Excessively Pernickety Neighbours

I recently heard this behaviour being described as "Willy waving"."
Wonderful and just sums it up. Treat him with the contempt he deserves- selective hearing and leave him to the workmen to deal with. An old school bully, hopefully one of a dying breed

I think you’ll find Westerlywind has left the room.

A friend of mine lived in a flat with an indoor communal area shared with three other flats - two upstairs and two downstairs

It clearly said in the lease agreement that the communal areas had to be kept clear for access in case of a fire.

One resident used to leave her baby buggy, scooter etc in the communal area, despite knowing the rules.

This caused a bit of bother but eventually my friend contacted the management company and they went to speak to the other tenant. This was all done confidentially. My friend did not want any repercussions as the young woman was a bit stroppy

I would suggest checking out the lease and adhering to what it says. If Mr Hitler complains, point out the terms of the lease. He wouldn't have a leg to stand on.

If he carried on, I would make a complaint to the management company.

I find that a ‘I’m sorry could you repeat that please, I’m a little hard of hearing’ repeated every time he finishes his rant/ moan is great fun for you and highly irritating for him. He should eventually run out of breath

Great tactic with someone you wish to avoid. Nothing more irritating than having to ask someone to repeat every phrase 2/3 times because they arent wearing their hearing aid. It makes the other person feel very foolish without actually making an enemy of them. Chances are they will begin to avoid someone who is so difficult to communicate with.

First occasion: Yes, lovely, good day
Second occasion: good day
Third occasion: smile

I find that a ‘I’m sorry could you repeat that please, I’m a little hard of hearing’ repeated every time he finishes his rant/ moan is great fun for you and highly irritating for him. He should eventually run out of breath.

Ha ha! You will probably discover he has a soft-spot for donkeys!

Mumofmadboys Good one. I will remember that. Thank you

Could you say ignoring his complaints 'Im so glad to see you. I'm selling raffle tickets for the donkey sanctuary. Would you like to buy some?'

I wonder what Joeroot posted. I guess I will not know. Could it even have been Mrs Pernickety or her female sidekick? Or even the bossy one.

This carry on has caused me so much upset I hardly ever go out not even to the bins. This is not right. No-one should be interfering in peoples lives.

It certainly seems like the majority of people here will do anything for a quiet life including putting up with being bossed around by a pest who is full of his own importance.

Reported

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Maybe the other neighbours have just given in so as not to have to be confronted by these people.
I'd put my plants out, making sure they weren't in any way going to get in people's ways.
I'd hang my washing out to dry.
I'd tell Mr. Hitler & the other neighbour to keep their noses out of my business, and tell them I know my rights having gone over them time and time again while in lockdown so as not to upset anyone!
You may even find the other neighbours seeing you doing it and start doing it themselves.
Tell the busybodies to go to Mrs. 'Helen Bach' at management to put in their nonsense complaints!

If there was a hunting season for neighbours as there is for grouse and pheasants Id be out there with a gun!

Get the facts right about the communal areas before you tackle this issue...Most communal areas have spaces to put out your washing...Sounds like Mr Hitler thinks he rules the roost....Needs to be put in his place... Strange how other neighbours put up with his nonsense..

To be honest, if you were leaving stuff lying around a communal area it might have been nice to stick a notice up in the lobby explaining they would be moved tomorrow, and apologising. I used to live in a block of flats and some people treated communal areas like extra storage space. If your neighbours have had that type of experience they may be very much on guard for it when someone new moves in.

Doesn't excuse rudeness of course. They could have just checked with you that it was being moved ASAP.

As these people have no legal right to interfere in what you do, I would ignore them AND make a point of hanging out my washing Monday to Saturday as and when it pleased me to do so.

As for plants, as long as you tend them and do not plant them or place flower pots in other peoples' way, that too is surely up to you, unless there are any rules forbidding it in your lease.

If they complain, ask politely what right they have to do so.

If it's leased which it may not be!

It would be very unusual for lessees to have the right to put their own potted plants on a communal area. Their rights over communal areas would be clearly set out in the Lease.

My NDN was a whiner and a bully. Several times I said to her husband that I "understood" that his wife had mental health problems and he used to just nod and look resigned. I know she bullied him and her children. Unfortunately he died recently and now there is no one to keep her in check. However she seems to have quietened down and lost a lot of her confidence. Shes having to do a lot more of the jobs he used to do for herself.

Given that Mrs "little hitler" tried to excuse her husband's behaviour, you may actually be able to create an unlikely ally there. Be super-nice to her in a conspiratorial way.
She must be heartily sick of his complaining.

You may be able to say to her you hope that Mr. little hitler is feeling better after getting so distressed- (and not causing you upset at home).
Thank her for coming to explain how stressed he gets. You can remind her that you have twice tried to give him the contractors information if he would like to reassure himself that all is well. You could later pop round and give it to her...
I would try to take pity (quietly) on the wife. She may resolve things behind the scenes.

westerlywind

I am in the UK.
The plants would have been outside and not on the internal stairways.
The items are placed on an outside communal area .
This man has a reputation for butting into everything but so far has never been seen taking on a man.
The management company do not take anything to do with personal issues only deal with communal matters

It sounds as if your property is leasehold - are they flats? If they are on a lease go back and check the conditions. Other leaseholders can be inclined to imagine there are conditions that never existed. I assume the management are the freeholders?

I once worked on a chat line doing the S&M calls and have a tongue like a lash when needed.

A few years ago two "men" (actually teens or early 20s) wearings masks kicked my door in and demanded money. I called them "sonny" and told them scornfully that they had come to the wrong house. I never kept cash in the house, wore expensive jewelry or owned a smartphone. I was not going to beg and plead with scum. They left with nothing.

After that experience no shitty little neighbour dispute is going to scare me.

Personally I wouldn't go down the route of saying to the man that it was harassment.

Remember you have to live next to this person. People like that can very quickly escalate things and make your life a misery on a daily basis. They thrive on confrontation and are just looking for someone who will engage in a fight.
A friend of mine is now in this situation with a neighbour who is a bully. He throws his fag ends into her garden and spreads rumours about her to other neighbours and it VERY nasty to both her and her daughter. She has become the focus of all his anger and is an easy target.

I would be very polite and say you realise its unsightly and let him know you too find it unsightly but know it will be over soon. If you have proof in the title deeds, I would mention that calmly.
And smile sweetly and walk away.

I abide by the rules in the Title Deeds and while I (and others) are not allowed this or that some people such as the ones doing all the moaning disregard the rules.