True friend or not ?

CanadianGran

Moving can be a very stressful time. Perhaps she is focusing on the sometimes overwhelming task of settling into her new house, and hasn't really contacted anyone.

I would give her the benefit of the doubt. She may be thinking the same as you and wondering why you haven't contacted her asking how she is settling in.

It does sound as though she is a bit self centered though. I would wait a little bit before letting the friendship fizzle out.

She has been planning to move for the past 6 months , everything has been organised. I have been very poorly in hospital these past couple weeks so no, I’ve not contacted her to ask how she’s settling in as that’s been the last thing on my mind . She doesn’t know what’s been happening as she has not taken the least bit of notice .

Looks like she is a taker and you are a giver

Who would initiate a call and an interaction in the past?

NotTooOld

Hmm, it does sound as though you have been taken for granted, I'm afraid. Did you perhaps rather overwhelm this person with offers of friendship? Sorry if that is hurtful. Is she a rather private individual who prefers to keep it that way but did not know how to tell you? I too would feel hurt in your position but I think you should take the hint - she does not sound like the sort of friend you are looking for. I should look for a new friend if I were you and not someone who is planning on moving away. Hope you are soon out of hospital and feeling better.

No she is not a private individual who prefers to keep it that way , she more than welcomed our mutual friendship when we first met and enjoyed what we did together As to her plans to move away we had decided that we would keep in touch with one another and meet up for the occasional coffee/ lunch . But her lack of thought for me while I’ve been so very ill has made me question her friendship.

sorry, but she saw you coming.
next time, don't be so quick to offer lifts, or to put yourself out.
there was no mutuality in this association, but you didn't notice, until you were of no further use to her.
when i say next time, obviously i mean with someone else. she is toast.
hope you are feeling better.

Moving can be a very stressful time. Perhaps she is focusing on the sometimes overwhelming task of settling into her new house, and hasn't really contacted anyone.

I would give her the benefit of the doubt. She may be thinking the same as you and wondering why you haven't contacted her asking how she is settling in.

It does sound as though she is a bit self centered though. I would wait a little bit before letting the friendship fizzle out.

I'm sorry to hear that you have been so poorly and I hope that you are recovering well.
Sadly life is full of people like this - there are people who are givers and people who are takers.
The best people are the givers because they will give always give because they are generous of their time and willingness to help others but other people will take advantage of this generosity as it costs them nothing to be greedy and selfish.
You have done nothing wrong but quite rightly you are hurt by this person and her cavalier, unkind and thoughtless attitude towards you. She will miss you more than you will miss her because you were a means to an end with giving her lifts etc.
She was not a friend and you must (if you can) move on and expand your friendships with other ladies in the W.I. as well as the other lady that you lunched with.
I speak from experience and still try to hold onto the values that my mum taught me - that you do things because you want to for other people not for reward.
Unfortunately, over the years I have dropped a few people from my life - as being the taken the mick out of can be wearing at times and I deserve better than that!! As do you!!

Hmm, it does sound as though you have been taken for granted, I'm afraid. Did you perhaps rather overwhelm this person with offers of friendship? Sorry if that is hurtful. Is she a rather private individual who prefers to keep it that way but did not know how to tell you? I too would feel hurt in your position but I think you should take the hint - she does not sound like the sort of friend you are looking for. I should look for a new friend if I were you and not someone who is planning on moving away. Hope you are soon out of hospital and feeling better.