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Awkward situation

(61 Posts)
Daisychain64 Tue 24-Jan-23 21:45:42

I wondered if that’s how she viewed sharing a room too Serendipity22 & NotSpaghetti as I recently had a spa day ... it doesn’t bother me at all what others choose to do I just prefer to get ready privately.
I was just interested in other people’s perspective as I feel really uncomfortable to bring it up with her & would rather avoid a similar scenario in future as she has been a good friend to me.

Wyllow3 Tue 24-Jan-23 21:45:20

I'd say I'd like come and say can we talk something over?

I'd admit I wasn't comfy with her doing that, would she prefer to have separate ensuite rooms so she can use facilities exactly when she wants?

then its open for her to say, "oh, thats not necessary, I'll wait till you've finished or take the option of facilities she can use anytime she wants.

BlueBelle Tue 24-Jan-23 21:44:59

Lock the door

Grandmadinosaur Tue 24-Jan-23 21:40:54

When ever I’ve gone away with a friend we usually say who is going or needs to go in the bathroom first and whenever I’m going in myself I always ask if they have finished in there. I would recommend that and saying something along the lines of checking that they don’t have any need to return in there. Also yes lock the door.

Doodledog Tue 24-Jan-23 21:38:56

I wouldn't have been happy either, but agree that it's probably a clash of expectations. Can you get separate rooms next time, or a serviced apartment instead of a hotel?

Failing that, when I wanted to get ready next time, I would just ask if she needed to use the bathroom for the next 15 minutes, as I was about to use the shower, and be sure to lock the door.

NotSpaghetti Tue 24-Jan-23 21:34:55

I suppose it's like the changing room at the gym. She probably just saw it like that as you were sharing a room. I'm not bothered at the gym and total strangers are sometimes naked there...

I'd not choose to share a room to be honest. Maybe you can suggest you each have a room if you like her company other than this?

Daisychain64 Tue 24-Jan-23 21:34:40

There was a lock but I honestly thought she wouldn’t come in ...it’s not something I’d personally ever do ... I’d have thought most people would know not to invade someone’s personal space ...

Kate1949 Tue 24-Jan-23 21:33:48

I would have locked the door.

Serendipity22 Tue 24-Jan-23 21:33:00

Ohhhh heck... errrr to be quite honest I wouldn't like that.... yes I would view it precisely the same as you BUT your friend obviously didn't see it posing a problem and that is not her fault.

We are allll different and what suits 1, doesn't suit another. I think that if there are going to be more breaks away, i would have to say something, not in a nasty way, not in a way to cause friction between you both BUT if it isn't addressed then its going to obviously continue where you are on edge and your friend is oblivious.....

😃

Ladyleftfieldlover Tue 24-Jan-23 21:29:08

Didn’t the en-suite have a lock? If it didn’t, can’t you simply ask your friend not to come in while you are are using the facilities? Actually, why would anyone be embarrassed to ask a friend not to barge in?

Daisychain64 Tue 24-Jan-23 21:23:35

I was asked last Summer if I’d be interested to go away on a City break by an old friend.
We rarely see one another due to our busy lives so it was lovely to catch up.
We had a lovely time, however on the second morning my friend entered the bathroom (shared a twin room with en-suite) without knocking & carried on getting ready whilst I was in the shower.
I felt quite shocked as it was overstepping boundaries & as I would never dream of doing this myself I felt embarrassed to bring it up with her.
She’s asked to go away again this Summer & as I feel uncomfortable I’m going to suggest meeting up for the day instead.
I don’t want to lose her friendship but equally don’t want to be put in an awkward situation again.
How would you deal with this situation?.