Awkward situation

Didn’t the en-suite have a lock? If it didn’t, can’t you simply ask your friend not to come in while you are are using the facilities? Actually, why would anyone be embarrassed to ask a friend not to barge in?

Ohhhh heck... errrr to be quite honest I wouldn't like that.... yes I would view it precisely the same as you BUT your friend obviously didn't see it posing a problem and that is not her fault.

We are allll different and what suits 1, doesn't suit another. I think that if there are going to be more breaks away, i would have to say something, not in a nasty way, not in a way to cause friction between you both BUT if it isn't addressed then its going to obviously continue where you are on edge and your friend is oblivious.....

😃

I would have locked the door.

There was a lock but I honestly thought she wouldn’t come in ...it’s not something I’d personally ever do ... I’d have thought most people would know not to invade someone’s personal space ...

I suppose it's like the changing room at the gym. She probably just saw it like that as you were sharing a room. I'm not bothered at the gym and total strangers are sometimes naked there...

I'd not choose to share a room to be honest. Maybe you can suggest you each have a room if you like her company other than this?

I wouldn't have been happy either, but agree that it's probably a clash of expectations. Can you get separate rooms next time, or a serviced apartment instead of a hotel?

Failing that, when I wanted to get ready next time, I would just ask if she needed to use the bathroom for the next 15 minutes, as I was about to use the shower, and be sure to lock the door.

When ever I’ve gone away with a friend we usually say who is going or needs to go in the bathroom first and whenever I’m going in myself I always ask if they have finished in there. I would recommend that and saying something along the lines of checking that they don’t have any need to return in there. Also yes lock the door.

Lock the door

I'd say I'd like come and say can we talk something over?

I'd admit I wasn't comfy with her doing that, would she prefer to have separate ensuite rooms so she can use facilities exactly when she wants?

then its open for her to say, "oh, thats not necessary, I'll wait till you've finished or take the option of facilities she can use anytime she wants.

I wondered if that’s how she viewed sharing a room too Serendipity22 & NotSpaghetti as I recently had a spa day ... it doesn’t bother me at all what others choose to do I just prefer to get ready privately.
I was just interested in other people’s perspective as I feel really uncomfortable to bring it up with her & would rather avoid a similar scenario in future as she has been a good friend to me.

I asked if she would like to use the bathroom before I went in which is why it was a surprise when she walked in soon afterwards Grandmaddinosaur & Wyllow3 ... super awkward!

Thanks very much for everyone’s suggestions ... I wish I was a more outspoken person in this type of situation! ...

Just get separate rooms. Problem solved. I prefer my own space.

I would always get a single room. would never share!

Yes it must have been a shock. It's a strange thing to do.

I'm sure you can still have a nice break without sharing a room or simply by locking the bathroom...

I'm think she will understand if you discuss it with her - but if you really can't bring the subject up you could call the suggested hotel and ask if they have locks on the en-suite bathroom doors?
If they don't, maybe you will have to say you aren't sleeping very well and need your own space?
I do understand you are finding this awkward.
Good luck.

Daisychain64, I wouldn't have been bothered at all as I'm quite ok with washing/dressing alongside friends. Having a large family, we'd share the bathroom - or we'd never have all got to school and work on time.

Therefore, what seems odd to you could be perfectly normal for her. I wouldn't bring up the subject right now with her, though - just lock the door next time - or tell her when necessary (if you take a shower in her presence) that you'd like some privacy.

But just walking in, well you might be sat on the toilet...

Hetty58 I completely understand if you grew up as part of a large family ...
Wyllow3 that’s my point ... it felt like an invasion of privacy in the context of a friendship ...

Don’t bring up the subject - it would put a dampener on your friendship. Just lock the bathroom door when you’re using it.

Because she gave me an appraisal afterwards I think I’m going to suggest days out & not put myself in that situation in future ... you’re right crazyH as she is an outspoken person I’m uncertain how she’d respond.

Why can’t you lock the bathroom door it’s just so simple you don’t have to explain anything or tackle her surely everyone locks the bathroom when not in their home situation

Usually I do lock the door BlueBelle ... I guess I felt there was no need on that occasion as it’s never been an issue with other friends but certainly will do so in future.

Could you not use the very polite English phrase: "Would you mind very much if I used the bathroom myself while you waited till your turn? I tend to like my own space when showering ." Sounds to me as if she is one of those ladies who is not embarrassed by crossing certain boundaries. I am like you and like to be private.