DIL insults our heritage

As a fellow northener and proud of the fact I think advice from Monica is spot on. Turn the tables on her (nicely of course) and see how she reacts.

Smile

Does she have a sense of humour? Could it be that she doesn't actually have a sense of humour herself, but has heard people make jokes about 'Northerners' or Southerners' and seen people laugh once.

So now, she keeps repeating these offensive remarks thinking that they are funny, not understanding that they are hurtful?

We have a name for those sorts where I’m from Lady Muck from Turd Hill. I think this is more about her insecurities than anything. I would be vocalising the Lady Muck quote but I am not terribly good at masking 😂

Your SON needs to handle this.

I'd just totally ignore the comments - as pride would prevent me from revealing that they upset me at all. It's just sticks and stones, after all.

My parents came from up North and moved the family down South when I was little. I suppose I am quite well spoken but would love to have a Northern accent! Don’t people from Somerset talk like pirates? I have a brother who mocks our Northern relatives on Facebook and it makes me cringe. I think he is secretly jealous that he never got to be a Northerner! I don’t understand what there is to mock, to be honest. It must be nice to be a perfect Somersetion if that’s even a word! Incidentally I am proud of all my ancestors who worked in cotton mills and mines. They were the life blood of the country.

Low contact

I don't think you can do anything about it. She is insecure and is unlikely to change - but your grandson can learn the truth. His father should really speak up more I feel - and explain to him that good and not so good is everywhere including Somerset!
I'd hope your son tries to make sure they travel a bit.

She’s very rude and must be unhappy. I would arrange to meet with her somewhere neutral and try to sort it out, say how her remarks hurt you as you really want to get on with her. Find out why she want to belittle her husbands family. If you are met with hostility though, from now on I would have as little contact as I could and you both need distance but if you have to meet, agree no more put downs and snide remarks.

I have a short wick and this would really set me off. Sometimes it’s necessary to almost scare someone with your temper to set things straight and up with this I would not put! Bad language, derision? Are you man (woman) or mouse?

My late MIL was a bully, but when she saw me fired up, she soon backed off.
(I grew up in inner city Liverpool BTW 👍)

She obviously feels inferior to her well-educated, up-together in-laws. Her people may be middle-class but it from what you say, she herself has become déclassée. It happens. Hard on your son.
She is being defensive - and offensive.
Can you talk to your son? Your DGC should not have to hear their grandparents' heritage being insulted.

When I went south to London, very many years ago as a student, I said at first that I came from Liverpool, because I thought it the nearest place anyone would have heard of. I found I got a negative response, almost pity. This annoyed me, so I started to say I came from Cheshire, which was actually the truth. The response was quite different. Cheshire, it seems, was considered OK.

How horrible. I would be extremely offended if anyone dared to mock my accent or my hometown. I have several towns that I have called home and liked them all.
I can only think she finds it amusing to taunt you like this. But to include her child is unforgivable.
I love Yorkshire and have lived there and have a DiL from there.
I know little about Somerset apart from the cider. Hereford cider is rather good too!

Downright rude isn't she. I would try hard to ignore her remarks, but if she kept on I would fail spectacularly!

Anniebach

The O/P opinion of her daughter in law shows the dislike is both sides

There's no love lost, is there!

I used to live on the Wirral and absolutely loved Liverpool and the accent, in fact I like most accents and especially northern ones.. your DIL sounds rather ignorant and untravelled.. I would have definitely not tolerate such lack of respect

She sounds rather insecure

I'd just ignore her when she starts with the daft comments

BigLoius I think Liverpool is one of the most wonderful cities i have ever had the pleasure to visit.

I simple " i am so surprised you married a man from a place you despise so much"

The O/P opinion of her daughter in law shows the dislike is both sides

Redhead56

She does not have the confidence to be rude she is just clearly ignorant. If she made remarks like that in Liverpool or surrounding area she would be put in her place and quite rightly so.

Your DIL would certainly be put straight in Liverpool/Wirral we take no prisoners when it comes to our heritage.
Does she say this sort of thing to your son ?

Somerset? She must be joking. Surely. We used to laugh at people from there in the bad old days when I lived in London. Maybe that’s her problem- inferiority complex.

It was hurtful and out of order bringing your GS into it Grannypalmtree and as you say she likes attention and getting a reaction, ignoring her does seem the best way to go.

Is she from Somerset? Plenty of jokes and stereotypes also. Try a few in 'retaliation' with a smile, and if she says something- just tell her what is good for the goose, etc- and laugh and just tell her her constant digs are a bit much and can be hurtful.