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AIBU

Letting a delivery driver use your loo

(132 Posts)
62Granny Tue 15-Aug-23 16:15:22

Just had my supermarket shopping delivered and the driver ( not one I have seen before) asked me if there was any public toilets in our village, I pointed him in the direction of the library and the community centre both within a few yards of each other. Hubby said I should have offered him to use ours ?
What do you think ? AIBU?

MayBee70 Sun 01-Oct-23 02:35:27

Not just pubs. Hotels, too.My partner told me that. I didn’t believe him but were in Dublin and we went into Bono’s hotel. Just walked in. Mind you, it was over 16 years ago, maybe things have changed. I once travelled home by train and realised I’d have to wait an hour for the bus and my bladder wasn’t up to that. I couldn’t go to the loo in the station because it was on a different platform and I couldn’t re enter the station to get to it so I walked into the posh hotel next to the station and went there. I’ll always remember going to a loo somewhere in Italy ( or it might have been Germany or Austria…it was when we used to drive round Europe every summer). I had to ask the barman for a key. When I took the key back a group of elderly gentleman said to me ‘better now’. I don’t remember much about the rest of that holiday, just that.

Elrel Sat 30-Sept-23 21:02:36

One of the useful things my mother (very proper and rarely drank) taught me when I left home was ‘you can always go in a pub’. I was always surprised that she did this herself when desperate. I was nervous the first time but she was right. If I don’t buy a drink (which would start the cycle off again!) I offer 50p change for any charity box on the bar. Some shops, even small ones, are obliging, especially for a child.
Re bus drivers on long routes, I once heard that they carry McDonald’s milkshake containers, oh dear!
My only loo is at the top of the stairs, I do tend to hover at the bottom, near the front door, if a driver I don't know asks to use it.

Witzend Sun 24-Sept-23 15:41:24

I let tradesmen and a regular delivery driver use our downstairs loo. TBH it’s never occurred to me not to - especially lately, when I seem to be in an almost semi-permanent state of wanting the loo for one thing or the other.

Katmandolino Tue 29-Aug-23 16:58:48

I usually say that it's not working and I'm waiting for the plumber, but they're welcome to pee in my garden, or spider infested cludgie (Scottish for outside lavatory).
I do feel mean, but serial killers don't have it stamped on their forehead, and it only takes one mistake.

Grammaretto Sat 26-Aug-23 12:15:02

For years when my DC were growing up there were public toilets in our town centre open during the daytime and with a caretaker. They were always clean.

Now with all the council cutbacks the first thing to go are the toilets, followed by libraries. There are other less visible closures .

The supermarkets have customer toilets and the cafes and pubs I guess.

It's very unwelcoming. If I'm out and about I like to know there are loos. Essential I would say

lemsip Sat 26-Aug-23 09:06:53

I have a loo by the front door so would allow it as front door would be open.... I can understand a 'no' if it meant going upstairs.

Franbern Sat 26-Aug-23 08:32:46

mabon1

Not if I was alone - no way.

Why , on earth, not? Do you think they are going to attack you? ransack yourhome? hold you to hostage? These are people doing a difficult, job, very time restricted.

I am quite astonished that people are so very scared of anyone they do not know. How do you all manage when needing to have builder or repair people coming into your homes? They are strangers also.

mumofmadboys Fri 25-Aug-23 19:06:44

Of course I would let a delivery driver use the loo. Not a problem.

mabon1 Fri 25-Aug-23 19:02:39

Not if I was alone - no way.

Elusivebutterfly Fri 25-Aug-23 18:57:55

This is all made worse by the disappearance of public loos. Public loos disappeared years ago. Since covid the local supermarkets have closed their toilets. . The library has no customer toilets. Large shopping centres are the only places with public loos but are often in hard to find out of the way places.
When I travel outside London, stations have toilets but none in the london suburbs except for a few large stations like East Croydon.
I sometimes resort to buying a tea or coffee in a cafe so I can use the loo.

Germanshepherdsmum Fri 25-Aug-23 18:26:30

Sadly, so many public loos are vandalised. It’s been a problem in my nearest town, visited by many holidaymakers.

DiamondLily Fri 25-Aug-23 18:18:53

My late DH was an insurance inspector (back when they had them), and told me how desperate he used to get.

So, yes, I do let people like that use the loo.

I've never had a problem with doing that.🙂

Doodledog Fri 25-Aug-23 16:05:06

My home town has lost three sets of public loos recently. One in the bus station, which is a real loss for people making long journeys, one because they were demolished to create a car park, and the other because the Town Hall foyer is no longer kept open.

When the shops are closed the only loos are in pubs, and even when the shops are open it's only M&S that has ones that are open to passers by - the rest are all 'customers only'.

LovesBach Fri 25-Aug-23 15:05:12

Why do we not have enough public lavatories? Is it due entirely to lack of funds for provision and maintenance, or perhaps under use has prompted local authorities to close the facilities. There were several public lavatories in the local town, but a department store with spotlessly clean and very smart cloakrooms has closed, and the council are allegedly 'upgrading' the ones near the town centre. They have been closed for so long that people suspect they may never open again .

Fartooold Wed 23-Aug-23 18:58:04

A delivery driver asked every time he came to the house could he use the lavatory. Became rather concerned (prostate cancer) and asked if he had a problem (ex nurse) and he replied that my house was clean 🫢. Now a regular routine!

Dickens Fri 18-Aug-23 15:27:48

Auntieflo

I seem to remember seeing a programme about Taxi drivers, in London, and dotted about were little green painted huts? that the drivers could use.
Delivery drivers could do with a network of such facilities, but who would finance it?

... it could / should be financed jointly by those that employ them, or for whom they deliver?

Of course, it would eat into their profits, so they'd pass the cost on to the customer.

But it is unsafe, and unsanitary, for them to use plastic bags and hedgerows, and, I am informed by a Tesco driver - they are not supposed to request to use their customers' toilets. For legal reasons.

nothingsurprisesmeanymore Thu 17-Aug-23 20:48:55

I do let tradespeople on my premises use the bathroom when they ask but I'm always surprised when they query removing their workboots before going upstairs. I've noticed they rarely wash their hands and almost always leave the seat up! We once had a male/female decorator couple that used the bathroom first thing and always opened a window that we never used as it was hard to close (there was an alternative!). I wouldn't allow a random stranger in, but if they were genuine a delivery person would be allowed in. I would find it embarrassing to ask tbh so I imagine they'd feel the same.

jocork Thu 17-Aug-23 20:47:53

I have sympathy for anyone doing that sort of work. I worked on the census in 2021 and found going door to door for long periods a bit of a problem. There were a couple of places near my main area - Tesco and the railway station - but one day I was in a part of town I was unfamiliar with and suddenly needed to go. I was working with another person and had to make my excuses, dive back in the car and drive to the town centre Tesco. Thankfully I made it in time but in doing so I was concentrating so hard on getting there fast that I drove in a bus lane and got a ticket. I ended up spending rather more than a penny!

I have a downstairs cloakroom so would let a driver use that but I wouldn't want someone I didn't know going upstairs.

Auntieflo Thu 17-Aug-23 12:31:04

I seem to remember seeing a programme about Taxi drivers, in London, and dotted about were little green painted huts? that the drivers could use.
Delivery drivers could do with a network of such facilities, but who would finance it?

Grammaretto Thu 17-Aug-23 12:07:35

I remember asking at a petrol station in Germany if I could use the toilleten, bitte. I was given a key and long instructions which I barely understood. I must have found it and was grateful. 😀

MerylStreep Thu 17-Aug-23 11:52:12

JayDee60

I’m sorry but as much as I sympathise with drivers doing a great job delivering I would not let any use my toilet facilities. I wouldn’t feel comfortable knowing a perfect stranger had been in my bathroom.

What would you do if a plumber had to replace something in your bathroom, have the smelling salts handy?

bear1 Thu 17-Aug-23 11:29:01

if i had a house with downstairs toilet yes i would let them as i have a home thats one leval yes again i would let them but an up stairs loo then no

Dickens Thu 17-Aug-23 10:03:34

LizVck

I would rather they ask to use the loo than what happened to me. I used to own a small piece of woodland over the road from my home and a delivery driver needed to go and defecated in my wood he used some of his paperwork to wipe himself so I knew which company he came from I complained to no avail I was the one who had to go and dig a hole and bury it.

I think I'd have been tempted to take that story to the Daily Mail - they're quite good at naming-and-shaming. They're also quite good at campaigning for groups like veterans, pensioners, etc - they might have felt inclined to campaign on behalf of the drivers for regulated sanitary amenities!

We are a first-world nation - this is so damned primitive! There should be facilities along the routes, specifically for their use, where they can use soap and water.

On-the-road workers can, of course, use the facilities in supermarkets - as the man who came to read my electricity meter said, "no one checks on who is going to the loo". But it's all a bit hit and miss.

Dickens Thu 17-Aug-23 09:31:49

JackyB

As I have said before (sorry if it's too often) we don't have supermarket deliveries here in Germany.

That's interesting. How do disabled people and those who are housebound manage if they cannot get to the shops - do they have to rely on family or kindly neighbours?

As a 'medically vulnerable' person - during the Covid lockdown, the supermarket deliveries were an essential to people like us - no family in the UK... of course we have friends, but many were in the same boat, and anyway one doesn't like to impose on a regular basis.

Do you think it will 'catch-on' in Germany?

LizVck Thu 17-Aug-23 09:09:23

I would rather they ask to use the loo than what happened to me. I used to own a small piece of woodland over the road from my home and a delivery driver needed to go and defecated in my wood he used some of his paperwork to wipe himself so I knew which company he came from I complained to no avail I was the one who had to go and dig a hole and bury it.