Trans Teacher

No kicks for me. And I am not attacking, I am defending myself and others from your slurs. It's just as boring for me, but the alternative is to leave them there unanswered.

Would you prefer to be able to post 'I can see how that will be twisted' and have it left unopposed? Well, yes, I suppose you would, but in the interests of fairness I can't ignore it.

Do you get some sort of kick out of this ladies?

Start an argument with me, force me to defend myself, then on and on you go for days and then blame me for it...

Reams and reams of just unnecessary attacks

I am stronger than that and I see it for what it is

VioletSky

I've just seen how that will be twisted

*I like debate*

Another pass/agg dig . You are accusing people of twisting things (aggressive) without saying how the alleged twisting will be done, or who will do it (passive). Additionally, it gives the impression that you are pre-empting something after realising that your statement about personal comments and how Some People allow damaging behaviour is also passive aggressive, and are attempting to get in first with your accusations against those Some People. Any responses will, you hope, be interpreted as 'twisting'.

A personal dig is still personal whether the digger names the intended 'diggee' or not. You claim that you and Glorianny receive personal comments, but can't you see that this is a matter of your 'opponents' on these threads being honest about who and what they are addressing? Disagreement is not personal, and you (generic) can be personal without naming the accused.

Conversely, naming someone then saying something vague is equally PA. What have you actually said here, for instance:
Given comments I have read from you on other issues that are not trans related, and doodledog if she is interested... I genuinely never expected that comment to be an issue with either of you

But silencing different views is not healthy... it doesn't find a way forward that suits everyone. That shouldn't be the end goal in discussion... I can prove that too because over time I have listened to the needs of women and tried to accommodate them in any solutions or ideas I propose.. because I understand that while some things don't bother me, they bother others...

If I weren't more accepting of trans people than you two, we would probably get on

The post was addressed to Dickens, and named me, but you have not told us what we are supposed to have done - or not in any sort of meaningful way, at least (passive). How can either of us defend ourselves without knowing the charges? We can't, so have no right of reply (aggressive)

You have made digs (aggressive) that can't be answered because they are meaningless or implicit. You indirectly suggest that others are 'silencing views', unspecified comments are 'an issue', you imply that you are the only one who understands that the views of others are relevant - all of these are aggressive, but couched in a passive way.

You say you 'like debate', but don't engage in it. Why not look at what people are saying, and address their points, instead of claiming to have 'proved' things, and making digs at our characters?

VS again you post the truth. I agree that
it is your arguments that become damaged by behaviour you allow.

Doodledog had it right when she posted @10:39.

This thread has become all about VS, so I'm leaving it there.

I've just seen how that will be twisted

I like debate

I like people disagreeing with me, that's not the issue at all

Pretending all the personal comments against myself and other posters like glorianny didn't happen...

There is a word for that...

It's up to you guys being the majority how you run these discussions and as I said, it is your arguments that become damaged by behaviour you allow

You obviously don't know the right people on facebook

Not on mine either, but on FB I don’t see posts from people who think they are being persecuted or dismissed or who take offence and flounce off.

Glorianny

Mollygo

FenellaFootstrap

This seems like an appropriate place to leave this

I don’t know where you found that FenellaFootstrap,
but it’s very good.

It's been on facebook incessantly.

Not on mine

Mollygo

FenellaFootstrap

This seems like an appropriate place to leave this

I don’t know where you found that FenellaFootstrap,
but it’s very good.

It's been on facebook incessantly.

FenellaFootstrap

This seems like an appropriate place to leave this

Well said, FenellaFootstrap

Very good Fenella.

VioletSky

Ok

I tried

Not losing sleep over it

We are all trying, though. Dickens and I have tried as patiently as we can to explain passive aggression, that just saying something is not proving it and that phrases like 'for the benefit of anyone who doesn't understand it' sound condescending at best.

The response is to brush what we say aside - 'Oh, well I tried' -which is not helpful. It looked as though we might be getting somewhere earlier, but it's like banging your head against a wall.

I realise it is probably pointless to say this, but there is no persecution going on - if I agree with you (*VS*) I say so, and if I don't, I say so. Same as everyone else does. I don't know what you would consider to be a good idea? Should people pretend to agree when we don't?

Anyway, this thread has become all about VS, so I'm leaving it there.

Great meme, Fenella . I'm stealing that for future use.

FenellaFootstrap

This seems like an appropriate place to leave this

I don’t know where you found that FenellaFootstrap,
but it’s very good.

This seems like an appropriate place to leave this

Catching up and pondering the use of discussions in order to understand what passive aggressive behaviour is. Then acceptance by Violet that yes, she does react in a passive aggressive way and is working on it.
Otherwise, no change.
Thanks again to Doodle and Dickens for the feet on the floor approach

If a man wears a skirt and is a Mr isn't he still a man? How is a Trans man not a Mr, he is still biologically male even if he's had extensive surgery. He is not an inanimate object. What title should be used or do you drop Mr and just use their Christian name but wouldn't that also have to change? How are children in primary school supposed to understand.

Doodledog

I am not Dickens, and nor is my wife

... I am Spartacus, or hmm, well - maybe not...

nanna8 some people seem to think their presence on a thread is so all-consuming to others that we need to know they are leaving. The funny thing is they often come back to comment on a post 10 or 20 minutes later than their departure 🤣🤣

Really - who gives a rats whether people leave or stay on a thread ? It is not as though we are all sitting around at a tea dance.

VioletSky

For the benefit of anyone who doesn't understand it Dickens

Truly

Given comments I have read from you on other issues that are not trans related, and doodledog if she is interested... I genuinely never expected that comment to be an issue with either of you

But silencing different views is not healthy... it doesn't find a way forward that suits everyone. That shouldn't be the end goal in discussion... I can prove that too because over time I have listened to the needs of women and tried to accommodate them in any solutions or ideas I propose.. because I understand that while some things don't bother me, they bother others...

If I weren't more accepting of trans people than you two, we would probably get on

Thank you VS for responding directly to my post.

The comment is an "issue" because it's an accusation - one which implies lack of intelligence and insight. We didn't (and I still don't) know who it was directed towards, other than a collective "you".

Is anyone attempting to "silence" your view - or anyone else's? Opposing it is not an attempt to silence it. Not on GN anyway, and certainly not by me. As far as I am concerned, the more debate, the better. When someone criticises your view on trans women VS, I really don't believe there's any intention to silence it., just to question your belief, though you appear to think otherwise.

On other threads / topics I have, sometimes, given your comments a 'thumbs up' because they appear to be well-thought through, so I have no personal vendetta against you, I simply find it irksome the way you 'float in' your accusatory comments aimed at no one in particular but everyone in general, that's all.

People leave threads all the time. Most, realising GN is not an airport or train station, don't feel the need to announce their departure. Just saying

Ok

I tried

Not losing sleep over it

Again, that only proves that you left the thread. I’m honestly not being awkward here, but you don’t seem to understand what proving something involves.

And yes that is how I feel, that my views are being silenced..

Look how often I have left threads that have become much too personal for proof