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AIBU

Why do they do it?

(104 Posts)
kircubbin2000 Mon 11-Sept-23 12:32:26

I had to go to M and S first thing and it seems so did a lot of other old grans. I queued behind a nice lady of a similar age who only had a small shopping. What a mistake. She let it all pile up before searching for bags and slowly packing as she chatted to the lad on the till.Then she produced some papers and found money in an envelope which he dealt with. Next she wanted to pay by card for the rest but seemed unable to scan it. The boy did it for her after 3 tries.Then she had to rearrange the things in her handbag and finally put her shopping back in the trolley.
Why can't people be ready to pack as you go and have your card ready?Rant over.

dolphindaisy Tue 12-Sept-23 18:03:08

I didn't say it felt strongly about, I said I was amused by it. I don't think they are always trying to empty a heavy purse, more that they believe they are being helpful to the cashier, something I find endearing.

SueDonim Tue 12-Sept-23 17:43:50

dolphindaisy

One thing that always amuses me at checkouts is when the little old lady (always a little old lady) at the front packs her shopping, searches for her purse then insists on trying to count out the exact amount, searching through all her loose change down to the last penny. I feel like pointing out the checkout operator has a till full of change, they don't need the exact amount.

Why don’t you point it out to them, if you feel so strongly?

4allweknow Tue 12-Sept-23 17:40:19

I too cannot understand why it seems to come as a surprise to some shoppers that they have to pack and pay. In the stores where you are meant to just put shopping from the checkout back into your trolley then move to another area to pack but people choose to do their "pretty packing" instead really, really annoys me. They hold everyone up so infuriating when you only have a few items.

Milly12 Tue 12-Sept-23 17:30:57

When I was working full time and needed to get home to pick up kids from childminder, then I was impatient and would do anything to get through checkout quickly.
Now I am retired I am quite happy to wait while the customer in front of me faffs about. Often I use the opportunity to have a chat with the person behind me!!
Time means different things to different people.

Baggs Tue 12-Sept-23 17:30:13

Perhaps they have lots of coins in their purse and they want to lessen the weight

This is quite likely I think. I have a friend (not old and not particularly little) who does this.

GrannyGravy13 Tue 12-Sept-23 17:07:14

dolphindaisy

One thing that always amuses me at checkouts is when the little old lady (always a little old lady) at the front packs her shopping, searches for her purse then insists on trying to count out the exact amount, searching through all her loose change down to the last penny. I feel like pointing out the checkout operator has a till full of change, they don't need the exact amount.

Perhaps they have lots of coins in their purse and they want to lessen the weight, or maybe they just want to be helpful to the cashier…

dolphindaisy Tue 12-Sept-23 16:56:38

One thing that always amuses me at checkouts is when the little old lady (always a little old lady) at the front packs her shopping, searches for her purse then insists on trying to count out the exact amount, searching through all her loose change down to the last penny. I feel like pointing out the checkout operator has a till full of change, they don't need the exact amount.

GrannyGravy13 Tue 12-Sept-23 16:30:18

This thread has made me feel sad, so many posters without empathy for anyone slower than themselves.

A smile and a friendly word is far better than a huff and a puff…

ParlorGames Tue 12-Sept-23 16:15:03

I'm sure we have all stood behind that person in the supermarket queue.........I know I have.

But how many of us have offered to help them........I know I have.

It doesn't hurt to be kind to someone.........I know I have.

AGAA4 Tue 12-Sept-23 16:08:48

I always want to ask the huffers, puffers and sighers in queues what awful thing would happen to them if they are a few minutes later leaving the shop because someone in the queue is slow.

inishowen Tue 12-Sept-23 15:48:33

I was buying a lot at Iceland this morning. The elderly lady behind me had just a pint of milk. I offered to let her go first. She refused but chatted to me while my stuff went through. It occurred to me that she didn't want to be rushed through. She may have needed the chat! Be kind.

Baggs Tue 12-Sept-23 15:39:25

But, really, how likely is that?

Baggs Tue 12-Sept-23 15:36:08

lizzypopbottle

If it's perfectly acceptable for people to be slow, then it's perfectly acceptable for me to be in a hurry.

Agreed.

But what's not acceptable is being pushy because you're in a hurry. Your being in a hurry is your responsibility.

Being slow at a checkout might have (probably does have) a multitude of causes, most of which are not controllable by the slow person.

Reading this thread I'm beginning to hope that there exist people who are slow on purpose at checkouts just to annoy all the harried hares.

lizzypopbottle Tue 12-Sept-23 15:12:38

If it's perfectly acceptable for people to be slow, then it's perfectly acceptable for me to be in a hurry.

Gundy Tue 12-Sept-23 14:40:09

In regards to self-checkouts and those that feel stressed by people in line behind you because you’re not moving fast enough… do what I do - ignore them. Then when I’m all set to walk out the door, I turn and give everyone a big grin. Thank you!

Ailidh Tue 12-Sept-23 14:06:34

I always use self checkouts, if available. Not so much because of being impatient with slower people in front of me but because I want long enough not to fiddle but to pack my bag with the heaviest items on the bottom, scan my points card, scan my payment option without fear of disrupting others.

jenpax Tue 12-Sept-23 14:04:44

I think the idea of a slow lane and maybe an express check out is a good one. I dont want to get impatient with anyone (and I never say anything or sigh etc) but I do shopping for 2 households and often have small children in tow so am desperate to get out of the supermarket asap!

welbeck Tue 12-Sept-23 14:04:39

life does seem more complicated than the days of walking to the local sainsburys, with its marble slabs on each counter, beautiful mosaic floor, expert helpful assistants who served you, and then you took your bills to the cashier in the little booth at the far end to pay.
and knew you by name, and had the lost handbag, after carefully asking what was in it....
i. feel. old.

silverlining48 Tue 12-Sept-23 14:01:27

Once in a supermarket queue the lady in front wanted to dance with me and give me a hug, we danced and we hugged.
Her daughter was embarrassed, there was no need. My mum had dementia too and I understood.

welbeck Tue 12-Sept-23 13:59:14

i tell people the more they haff and puff the longer i will take.
it's not a threat, just the truth.
i am not confident with numbers, and having to do 2 transactions, remember 2 pins, remember car reg and scan receipt before leaving, lift heavy bags, return trolley and leave car park before getting another £90 fine for being 8 minutes over...

silverlining48 Tue 12-Sept-23 13:59:12

Someone being impatient behind a person who is slow could very well stop that person going out in future because of their embarrassment.
It might be their only opportunity to speak to someone/anyone. Please those always busy people, think about what might be going on in that persons life. A few seconds longer, does that really matter? No, it doesn’t.

jenpax Tue 12-Sept-23 13:51:53

I get irritated too as I am always in a tearing hurry and really cannot afford to be standing around waiting while someone carefully puts their card away and neatly arranges their shopping in their trolley. I know this is unreasonable and more a me problem than a their problem though.
What happened to the express checkouts they used to have 🤔

silverlining48 Tue 12-Sept-23 13:51:17

I agree, what is the rush. It could have been my mum, it’s someone’s mum, it might well be me a few years hence.
So be patient and kind. It costs little and means such a lot.

grandtanteJE65 Tue 12-Sept-23 13:50:30

Life is too short to be grumpy about this sort of thing.

The woman ahead of you in the queue probably lives alone and savours every minute of conversation she can get, irrespective of with whom.

The lad on the cash-desk had the manners to chat to her and help her scan her card and pay in cash for some of the shopping. Good for him.

This woman who annoys you so much has long since realised that flapping around in a hurry only makes one feel stressed, or she has rheumatism in her hands and can't pack things fast, or is slightly senile, or is lonely.

In a few years' time you and I may be in her place, and I do hope no-one with your unkind attitude will be behind us in the queue at the cash-desk, or anywhere else for that matter.

Aveline Tue 12-Sept-23 13:42:44

What is the rush anyway? How does an extra five minutes waiting for the customer in front to pay and pack impinge on your precious time? If you're so efficient how come you've not allowed enough time to get through a busy shop?
Life can be hard enough for elderly and disabled people without impatient people making them feel worse about it.