Are table manners important anymore?

Do we care? Does it matter? It is quite an interesting discussion.

Re driving. My driving instructor asked me when pedestrians have right of way. I replied’ When they have stepped on to a pedestrian crossing’.
He said, At all times! Do you intend to knock them down and kill them!’
I have never forgotten that wisdom, whatever the law says.

Re table manners- different countries have different customs. It is important to be polite, considerate and to fit in with your hosts. I am appalled by the behaviour of some children and blame their parents. I am glad my daughter has brought her children to be polite. They still ask to leave the table. The details may vary, but they will be good company in every sense at any table.

I agree.

Germanshepherdsmum

I would hate to think that OP was expecting a num. Does OP care/bother?

I’m a bit concerned OP is goading us!

lixy speechless. Can't imagine what university he attended that insisted on 'good, clear speech'.

Having just had GC's here for a few days, yes, (nonne) table manners do matter and that includes helping to lay and clear the table, taking a portion from serving dishes and pouring water from a jug.
We practised all of these daily when our Chn were at home and now with GC and I hope it will stand them in good stead.
(when it's just us we are more relaxed!)
When my DS went to University he thanked me for insisting that he spoke 'properly' at home - we always insisted on good, clear speech - as it helped him to fit in.

I would hate to think that OP was expecting a num. Does OP care/bother?

Yes?
No?

Long long ago I remember learning that those cunning Romans had different ways of starting a question, depending on whether a No or a Yes was expected. Somehow this thread brought that back to me
nōnne introduced a question expecting a “yes” answer
num introduced a question expecting a “no” answer.

So is this a nonne or a num ?
As soon as I read OP I also thought “This one will run and run”

I have had to tell one of my sons to be tighter with his young son's table manners.
I told him it will be important in later life, plus no one wants a messy playmate.

Reported [sigh]

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flappergirl

Mogsmaw

Germanshepherdsmum

No, it isn’t correct. Pedestrians don’t have the right to just cross the road wheresoever they wish.

Pedestrian priority

From January 2022 a pedestrian waiting to cross should be given priority. Previously, drivers were told to give way to pedestrians if they 'have started crossing and traffic wants to turn into the road'. The change also appears in the revised Rule 170.
This from the R A C site.
The law changed.
Pedestrian should be allowed to cross. They certainly should not be harassed off the road if a car turns onto the side road they are on. That was always the law.
“Ignorance of the law is no excuse” has always been a maxim.

OK, so we're talking about pedestrians waiting to cross a side road into which a car has begun to turn. In these circumstances I always stop if someone is already crossing (naturally!) but not usually if they are still on the pavement. I didn't know this had become law and judging by most other drivers in my busy city neither do they.

It has always been the law that pedestrians should be allowed to continue to cross, you were never allowed to mow them down but the excuse was always the pedestrian was at fault.
Now, from January 2022 you must allow a pedestrian to cross.
They have right of way. If you hit a pedestrian the car driver will be liable. They have an obligation to protect the more venerable road user.

Good manners in general are important. I was taught to say please and thank you and to ask to leave the table when everyone had finished eating . I was taught no elbows on the table and how to hold a knife and fork . Not to speak with mouth full nor chew with an open mouth and I’ve passed this on to my dc .
We took our dc to restaurants when they were small and got praised by the staff and other diners .
My ds worked in a pub/restaurant during uni and was appalled at the number of kids allowed to run around the place, getting in the way of staff carrying hot plates . And this was in a very yummy mummy area of south london .
Another thing on table manners my dd turned down a second date due to her dates appalling table manners .

Mogsmaw

Germanshepherdsmum

No, it isn’t correct. Pedestrians don’t have the right to just cross the road wheresoever they wish.

Pedestrian priority

From January 2022 a pedestrian waiting to cross should be given priority. Previously, drivers were told to give way to pedestrians if they 'have started crossing and traffic wants to turn into the road'. The change also appears in the revised Rule 170.
This from the R A C site.
The law changed.
Pedestrian should be allowed to cross. They certainly should not be harassed off the road if a car turns onto the side road they are on. That was always the law.
“Ignorance of the law is no excuse” has always been a maxim.

OK, so we're talking about pedestrians waiting to cross a side road into which a car has begun to turn. In these circumstances I always stop if someone is already crossing (naturally!) but not usually if they are still on the pavement. I didn't know this had become law and judging by most other drivers in my busy city neither do they.

that, i believe, is at junctions, not just anywhere on the highway ?

Waiting to cross, yes - not just darting across thinking they have the right of way.

Germanshepherdsmum

No, it isn’t correct. Pedestrians don’t have the right to just cross the road wheresoever they wish.

Pedestrian priority

From January 2022 a pedestrian waiting to cross should be given priority. Previously, drivers were told to give way to pedestrians if they 'have started crossing and traffic wants to turn into the road'. The change also appears in the revised Rule 170.
This from the R A C site.
The law changed.
Pedestrian should be allowed to cross. They certainly should not be harassed off the road if a car turns onto the side road they are on. That was always the law.
“Ignorance of the law is no excuse” has always been a maxim.

JaneJudge

I think table manners are important to a degree but I work and live in a multi cultural area and it is absolutely normal to eat with your hands and it doesn’t bother me at all 🤷‍♀️ Maybe it’s more complicated

I agree JJ but I can't bear eating with people who speak with their mouths full...

I think table manners are important to a degree but I work and live in a multi cultural area and it is absolutely normal to eat with your hands and it doesn’t bother me at all 🤷‍♀️ Maybe it’s more complicated

Pedestrians have the right to be on the road where there are no footpaths though and cars will have to stop if it isn’t safe to pass them

Norah

^Does anyone care any more?^

Yes.

People note when people eat quietly, don't shovel, don't chew with mouth open, sit with hands folded. Yes it matters.

I agree Norah. I do eat holding a fork in my right hand because I can’t use my left hand but the main thing is to be considerate of others.

No, it isn’t correct. Pedestrians don’t have the right to just cross the road wheresoever they wish.

Mogsmaw

I always thank car drivers who stop to let me across the road and grateful for any help
Sorry, this isn’t about manners. This is about the law!
You have a right to cross the road. Pedestrians have a right of way. The law was changed recently to emphasise this.
I am sick of crossing when a car just drives at me. I had to jump into a hedge last month when a car drove towards where I was crossing a car park and suddenly turned towards me. No indicators, no slowing down. I was “lucky” there was a hedge.
I was late for a class because I spent 10 minutes attempting to cross the road. I told the class why I was late and a driver said she’d never let a pedestrian cross because another car might run into her. I asked if she felt the same about roundabouts and. Red light, other places she was legally required to stop.
We must reign in some of the terrible attitudes that exist on the roads. And it starts with us all.

Do you mean that pedestrians have the right of way anywhere, not just on zebra crossings and other designated places? I am sure this isn't correct. It would be extremely dangerous for vehicles to stop randomly to let someone cross.

I agree with the person at your class. I always stop at zebra crossings and any other designated pedestrian crossings, but I wouldn't just suddenly stop my car in the middle of the road to facilitate a crossing.

The car behind could go into me as they would see no reason for my actions and additionally, the pedestrian could be hit by a car/motorbike coming in the other direction which I may not have seen and over which I have no control. It is dangerous to wave pedestrians into the road.

If was good for my son too. And he’s determined that his daughter will also go to the local school; his privately educated wife is in full agreement.

Germanshepherdsmum

As I said above FP, the public school boys - I don’t know about girls - did not generally do well in the lunch part of the interview. And of course they have to be able to perform well in front of clients not only in the office but in social situations. Young people ignore the importance of good manners at their peril - their potential employers are of a different generation to whom social niceties are important.

Our girls always said that going to the local school did they such a great service as they could handle anyone, in any situation. And being well spoken, good manners, etc- helped them so much in climbing the ladder.

Not my choice for the GCs schools.

I was taught good manners at both home and at school not just table manners but general good ones. "Manners maketh man". was constantly quoted.
As a student I was called over by a lecturer and told I was not at school now and did not have to hold the door open for men,it was ladies before gentlemen now.