Hospital visiting all hours (please be kind 😂 )

Its bad enough being in hospital without being disturbed by hordes of people. it was much better when it was an hour in the evenings with an extra hour on weekend afternoons. these days patients no matter how ill are made to dress everyday as well. to me hospital visiting is something to be dreaded you sit there and get stuck what to say so dont know how people want to spend a long time there!

I wholeheartedly agree! I was recently in hospital and they had 24 hour visiting hours. 😳

Our local hospital has visiting hours set as 1400 to 1600, then 1800 to 2000. However, they are flexible when necessary. Nice for the patients and staff alike as jobs have to be done and patients need rest.
When my husband was in hospital in Germany I was allowed to stay with him as long as I liked, and only had to leave at bedtime.

I couldn't agree more. In 1970, my mother had to go into hospital for the last two weeks of her pregnancy with my sister as she had high blood pressure. My paternal grandparents came to look after my brother and me as my dad had to work. We were five and two at the time. A mother's older children were only allowed to visit on Sunday afternoons at that time. In 1975, when I was ten, I had my first madtoidectomy (major ear surgery) and stayed for two weeks in an adults' ward because the operation was too big for the facilities at the children's hospital. Visiting was restricted to, l think, two hours in the afternoon and two in the evening. No visitors on the days of the operations (l had another smaller procedure on the ear the week after the first operation). Fast forward to 1991 when I had my first child and I spent nearly a week on the post natal ward (unimaginable nowadays but normal then). We had a ward sister of the old school who was very strict about visiting hours and after lunch bed rest. It made recovery much easier. In 1993, I was in a different post natal ward for two days after the birth of my second baby. It was totally different. The rules were not adhered to at all by the sister on that ward. The woman in the bed opposite me had visitors, including male visitors, all the time. This caused other problems, apart from not being able to get proper rest, because I was trying to establish breastfeeding and even going to the toilet with the heavy bleeding that is normal after giving birth became more embarrassing and stressful than it needed to be with strange men there at any time. By baby number three, the maternity department had been rebuilt and we had our own rooms. I was in for about 36 hours and it was so much better than the experience I had with baby number two.

Well Poppy, I quite agree. I recall being in hospital when I was little (tonsils?) and they had a matron who came round a couple of times a day, it was a bit like Hattie Jacques in a couple of Carry On films, she put the fear of god into lifelong atheists.

It sounds as if you needed something like that, if it was me being disturbed I might have had a couple of very loud conversations with a nurse, along the lines of "if I want to see chimps' feeding time, or a holiday camp canteen, I'll go to the zoo or Butlins" (apols if Butlins is no more!).

When I was a child and in hospital visiting was very limited and I was in a constant state of anxiety to see Mum and Dad. In my forties, in hospital for a couple of weeks, children running around the ward caused me was a different reason for constant anxiety as they often played tug, jumping on beds and bumping into trollies and lockers. Luckily, I had a pair of crutches and was able to use them as a barrier. Small children should not be on the wards unless they are being controlled or on a lead.

Visiting should be limited on wards . 2 per bed and for about an hour. Exceptions being the spouse or a parent. Sometimes patients can be loud and unruly too. My husband was in and very unwell , and two gentlemen were loud to the point that my husbands surgeon came back to ask them to" be quiet and consider others on the ward. I'm unable to hear my patients and they can't hear me" " if you feel the need to be so loud please go to the day room" he got a round of applause from other sufferers .

The last time I was really ill in hospital I was in a side room and slept most of the time. However, as I started to get better I was moved on to a ward and it was so exhausting I just wanted to go home for some peace and quiet. Though I have to say it was more the other patients than their visitors that was the problem; they had shouted conversations across the ward and the nurses were forever asking them to move to the day room, but many of them refused. I did end up crying in my bed one day just with the sheer frustration of needing some alone time.

It’s no longer practical for visitors to only be allowed to visit for a couple of hours a day because most people work long hours, and often there are very limited public transport options too.

So, bad luck for the patients who are supposed to be trying to rest and recover because the visitors' wishes are prioritised.

Visiting definitely needs some control. Two visitors max and respect for other patients. I spent weeks in total in hospital with our late son and until one doctor put her foot down we often had too many visitors, too much noise and even a sort of party for one child as it was her birthday. Often the children were not ill but kept in for obs, etc The curtain between beds was treated like a wall but with a seriously I'll child, it could be very stressful

I volunteered for 9 months as a Ward visitor very recently and was shocked at the behaviour of visitors on the ward. Quite a lot of patients were very seriously ill but there was no attempt to give them any privacy or peace and quiet. Visitors would crowd round the beds, roar with laughter, shout and talk on their mobiles very loudly whilst pacing up and down the centre of the ward. One poor patient had to use the commode next to his bed and kids who were visiting the neighbouring bed were holding their noses, shrieking with laughter and and making loud remarks about the smell. Totally unacceptable, but nobody did anything, least of all the nursing staff who behaved as if the visitors were invisible.

Mt61

When I was in hospital due to heart problem, it was the nurses on night shift that was the problem! talking so loud like it was 2 in the afternoon.. couldn’t sleep for the din. Nobody came to a poor woman across from me all night- had to get out of bed to see what she wanted, she was dying for a drink! Had to go & tell them that the woman wanted help. Poor woman was pissed up to the eyeballs by morning, I could hear day staff moaning.

Me & mum took it in turns to go & visit dad who has Alzheimer’s to feed him, we would go early to make sure he had his meals & drinks, nurses didnt seem to have time to feed him, they offered him a gastric feeding tube, we refused it POA.. anyway back home, up & dressed after months in the hospital for no good reason.

When I was in hospital due to heart problem, it was the nurses on night shift that was the problem! talking so loud like it was 2 in the afternoon.. couldn’t sleep for the din. Nobody came to a poor woman across from me all night- had to get out of bed to see what she wanted, she was dying for a drink! Had to go & tell them that the woman wanted help. Poor woman was pissed up to the eyeballs by morning, I could hear day staff moaning.

I agree with you - you aren’t grumpy at all.
I speak as a visitor recently, whilst my lovely Mum was poorly and sadly passed away in hospital.
Visiting hours were limited but were relaxed and we could, more or less, go anytime. But we were quiet - some people were very inconsiderate !
With some very poorly patients, staff should ‘have a word’ and visitors should respect staff and patients alike …

I've never really been onboard with the idea that someone in hospital must have someone with them at all times.
I mean, if you were poorly at home, you wouldnt have a constant stream of well wishers coming to sit with you.

If visiting is allowed all day when do the professional health workers actually visit a patient. Used to be Drs would try to see a patient sometime before afternoon visiting. The OPs ward sounds like mayhem. There have always been people who worked shifts, had children to be minded, difficulty with transport fitting in but they seemed to understand that a person in hospital is generally ill and does not need a circus to visit at all times. Seems even in hospitals people have no boundaries.

When I was in hospital once a nurse did that to me. It was a small hospital and not busy at all because it was on the verge of closing down.

She was easily 20 stones and in her 40s and would come puffing up the ward. Several of the beds were empty so she used to stop at mine, kick off her shoes and sit down saying her feet were killing her. We had some good chats but I did wonder how she managed her job carrying all that weight.

I was in hospital several times during Covid. I was put on any ward that had a bed often with elderly ladies with dementia. I’m 64. I also went in to hospital to have an hysterectomy due to aggressive sarcoma (cancer) and had to be dropped off outside the door and no visitors at all. The longest stay was 9 days, it was horrendous. Thank goodness for FaceTime with the family.

My daughter had some awful times in hospital.
There was a patient who kept coming and sitting on her bed, who obviously had mental health and drug problems, and if it wasnt her, there was a nurse who kept doing the same!!

Hospitals are horrible places
My husband was in for a chest infection late in 2022
The noise nearly drove him mad
The telly blaring patients hollering mentally ill inmates interfering with him personally
An absolute recipe for getting extremely ill and going crazy (I would’ve done)
He was so relieved when they moved him into the corridor
For me ( who need privacy) it would’ve been hell
I’m not sure exactly what has happened but when Matron ruled with an iron hand there was peace and cleanliness
I would not go to hospital if there was any possible way of avoiding it and to be honest if I had been my husband I would probably have walked out
Absolute disgrace

When my husband was in hospital I think that visiting was stopped sometime between 7 and 8 pm. Nobody was allowed more than a couple of visitors and I never saw children whizzing about.
I think that you should be entitled to a little peace and quiet in the late evening, particularly as it isn't easy to sleep in a hospital ward at night.

10pm really is very late - and I've never been very keen on other peoples' children!

I think it needs to be kept in mind that people often don't work neat, nine til five hours.

So, quiet visitors, and no more than two at a time (or even one?) could be accommodated, as long as they stick to the rules.

You are NOT being unreasonable! Hospitals are for sick and recovering people. There should be stricter visitation guidelines in ALL hospitals.

I’m surprised the facility you were in was very lax on allowing people all day and into late evening hours. That used to be the norm in old days. Did they not learn anything from the Covid years??

It’s about patients recovery and well-being. Plus the medical staff has their work in caring for you. Crowds, noise, kids get in the way.

Make sure, if you have the chance to fill out a patient survey, you let them know your dissatisfaction. Or write them a letter.
Most hospitals want to know how they can improve services.

No hospital wants a negative reputation for something like this.

My granddaughter (23) was recently in hospital for two weeks. She needed the ability to visit when ever people could because if she didn't her mental health began to degrade. Not everyone was able to visit every day and some days she had no one. I understand that sick people need to rest but restricted visiting is not the answer. Restricting the number and ages of visitors is the way. If someone has children they want to visit it should only be their own children and if possible visiting in a day room not in the ward with people who need to rest.