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AIBU

Nasty neighbour.

(127 Posts)
kircubbin2000 Sat 08-Jun-24 20:23:11

He's very unfriendly. I said hallo today when I saw him in the garden and it was all he could do to answer before walking off.
When I came out again I see he has blocked the gap in my fence where all the local cats including mine go through on their route. My cat examined it and then jumped over the top which is quite high.Im tempted to unblock it but don't want a row.

Oreo Sat 08-Jun-24 20:31:00

Most people block holes in fences and very few want to encourage cats in their gardens, that doesn’t really make him a nasty neighbour does it?
He may be unfriendly or just doesn’t know how to respond socially to others.Just give him a wave when you see him if he doesn’t like talking, and if he doesn’t respond then don’t bother again.

winterwhite Sat 08-Jun-24 20:33:15

Has he recently moved in? Maybe dislikes cats or didn’t realise gap was a cat route. Maybe cats will push their way through.

M0nica Sat 08-Jun-24 20:34:24

He may just be socially uncomfortable and prefer to keep himself to himself.

Dingleberry Sat 08-Jun-24 20:39:28

I don't blame him for blocking the hole, cats are a darned nuisance, digging up everything in your garden to poo. People own cats but open their doors and let them out to do whatever damage they like.

crazyH Sat 08-Jun-24 20:45:57

He’s just socially awkward, I guess. Give him a wide berth.

Georgesgran Sat 08-Jun-24 21:01:25

It’s a shame when you get an unfriendly, anti-social neighbour - life’s too short. There’s a couple near me (not neighbours) who are awful - they have cctv and listening devices rigged up and she has the Police out a couple of times a month to make unfounded, downright false claims about her neighbours. She even called them out refused Openreach permission to lay a cable and abused a chap pruning his own tree!
I suppose you could continue to greet him kirkubbin or as suggested, give him a wide berth.

AreWeThereYet Sat 08-Jun-24 21:42:23

Is the gap between your garden and his garden? I'm a bit confused. Maybe he doesn't like cats in his garden and is grumpy because he thinks you're being cheeky letting them in.

If I was you I would just give a cheery wave when I see him to leave the door open for the possibility of future friendship.

Cossy Sat 08-Jun-24 21:50:00

Do you own the fence? If you do he shouldn’t be touching it!

Aldom Sat 08-Jun-24 21:52:34

Poor man, being branded as nasty. What has he done to deserve that? Nothing as far as I can see from your post OP. Perhaps he is someone who finds social interaction painfully difficult. It's unkind of you to refer to him as nasty simply because he was slow to respond and then walked away.
As for blocking the gap in the fence, I think that is a perfectly reasonable thing to do.

Ziplok Sat 08-Jun-24 21:55:41

Just say “hello” when you see him (if you feel inclined to do so), and leave it at that. Maybe he prefers to keep himself to himself, or perhaps he wasn’t having a very good morning when you said hello. Perhaps give him the benefit of the doubt, but maybe leave the ball in his court next time?
Was the gap in the fence that he has blocked up where you saw him to say hello? If so, then leave him to it, as if that’s the case, then he obviously doesn’t wish to interact, sad though it is.

kircubbin2000 Sat 08-Jun-24 22:18:11

I have known him for 30 years even before I moved in and he is a grumpy ex headmaster well known for being odd. My fence broke and when I fixed it I put one half slat for the cat to get through. All the local cats follow a route through my garden,over the fence and into the next street.One kitten broke his leg last year and I think the high fence is a dangerous jump. Nothing will stop cats if they want to go somewhere. I feel he is being mean a d petty as they are doing him no harm.

Theexwife Sat 08-Jun-24 22:23:44

Maybe he has had problems with your cat and didn’t want to be friendly.

I love cats but not everyone does so it is unfair to expect them to want them in their gardens.

Marydoll Sat 08-Jun-24 23:12:13

I have to agree with Aldom.
The poor man may find social interaction painful, that does not make him a nasty person.

I certainly wouldn't want a trail of cats going through my garden. The bonnet of a former car of mine was badly scratched by a wandering cat, which had a habit of jumping on it.

NotSpaghetti Sun 09-Jun-24 01:14:16

I would have blocked up the gap on my side too I'm afraid.

I am sick of trying to keep other people's pet cats out of my garden.
Just had 48 seedlings planted close together ready for potting on/planting and they were decimated just this morning.

A couple of weeks ago I uncovered my new wildflower area but they immediately dug everything up in there.

Don't judge us if we try to prevent it please!

BlueBelle Sun 09-Jun-24 05:26:30

All the local cats follow a route through my garden,over the fence and into the next street

You cannot be serious (In a John MacEnroe type voice)

Sorry but I m on the gents side I would immediately block up a hole in a fence and I would not be happy if I had a group of cats using my garden as an alleyway
I m with you ( and the gent) notspaggetti cats are a bxxxxx nuisance in my garden even pooping in a flowerpot
I don’t dislike cats at all just don’t want them rampaging in my garden thanks

Curtaintwitcher Sun 09-Jun-24 07:07:32

I like cats, but they can be a nuisance. Plugging a hole in the fence is a perfectly normal thing to do. Don't take his behaviour personally.
Just because people live next-door to each other doesn't mean they have to be friends.

LadyStardust Sun 09-Jun-24 07:18:06

I'd give anything for my neighbour to scuttle off when I'm in the garden. He hangs about and tries to chat He knows everything (nothing) about all subjects and is always right! I have to sneak out to the bin or to hang out washing. Once he starts its so hard to get away!
I always say hi to him and try to get on with my jobs, but its so difficult! Before anyone says he's just lonely, he has a wife and a son!
I agree about keeping cats out of the garden. Damn nuisances! Sorry!

Calendargirl Sun 09-Jun-24 07:20:38

Cossy

Do you own the fence? If you do he shouldn’t be touching it!

If by blocking the gap you mean he put something across the fence on his side, then why not?

I would hate cats coming across my garden. No wonder he doesn’t chat if you encourage all the local ones to use the space as a walkway.

HeavenLeigh Sun 09-Jun-24 07:37:51

I would have blocked up the gap too I wouldn’t want a trail of cats coming through to my garden pooing and digging up my plants. I love cats I own some but mine are indoor many ppl get very cross by having local cats digging up their gardens. He might be grumpy could have an illness that makes him that way. I don’t think he’s nasty blocking up a route for cats though.

Katie590 Sun 09-Jun-24 07:55:09

We dont have a cat problem, in the past we had a terrier he kept the cats away and I'd have another, it’s totally unreasonable for your cats or any other pet to damage someone’s else’s property.

OldFrill Sun 09-Jun-24 08:42:37

He probably doesn't like cars and isn't keen on their irresponsible owners. Tell your cat to stick to its own domain, or put a cat proof fence up round your garden.

Astitchintime Sun 09-Jun-24 08:45:43

I'm on the gentleman's side too and feel that he was perfectly entitled to try and stop cats roaming in his garden.
I also have a problem with cats and I confess that I detest the wretched creatures - just this morning I saw one trying to use my front garden as a toilet. There is nothing I hate more that having to pick up cat s**t from around my shrubs and flowers.
Our neighbourhood is plagued with cats and whenever I see one I shoo it away.

The OP claims the neighbour was nasty but has she considered that he might be unwell, developed a hearing problem? We none of us know what everyone else is going through, perhaps he was having a bad day, perhaps he was in pain, maybe he had received some bad news - the OP should cut him some slack, leave the blocked section of fence alone (he is within his rights to prevent access to his garden) and stop assuming that the whole population love cats.................we don't!

kircubbin2000 Sun 09-Jun-24 09:02:08

I hadn't realised gransnet was an anti cat zone. Sorry I posted.

AGAA4 Sun 09-Jun-24 09:08:21

If he has cats pooing in his garden I'm not surprised he's grumpy. At our old house we had two cats who used our lawn as a toilet.
He was right to block access to the cats. I think 'nasty' was a strong word to use about this man.