Being last in a taxi

Agree with Pheebee, I would mention your concerns to your friend, don't fall out because if it, but it's only fair to find out cost including tip, divided by how many and sort it out before.

Hi if I need to use a taxi or Uber when out with a friend we have an arrangement of the first one to be dropped off makes sure to take photo of number plate and the last person to be dropped off txts or rings once safely inside their house.
I prefer Uber as the cost is already paid through the App and there’s no holdup then one can get straight out the vehicle.

It would be a shame to mar a friendship without really knowing why I agree AreWeThereYet.

Why don't you ask her why she doesn't like to be last in the taxi?

If it is about being alone with a male taxi driver it might be possible to ask if there is a female taxi driver available, if you book in advance. My brother is a taxi driver and their firm has four or five female drivers.

It could be to do with money but it might be something totally different. It would be a shame to mar a friendship without really knowing why.

I have rarely felt unsafe in a taxi. If it’s booked in advance you can ask for a woman driver. The company I use most often will try to oblige with that if they can.

Surely taxis are safe if you book them through a reputable firm. You get a text telling you what sort of car and the number plate, so they are easily traceable.
I do always sit in the back and try to keep conversation to the minimum.

Aldom

Ourkidl OP's husband gives several of the ladies a lift to the venue. As stated by the OP, they all return by taxi, driven by a taxi driver. Not the husband of the OP.

Oh yes, sorry - I must have been having a senior moment!

I don’t blame her to be nervous. When I was in my 30s & 40s, on two separate occasions I was assaulted by Asian taxi drivers- think because I sat in the front & last to be dropped off. Probably thought because I had a drink (not drunk) I was fair game.

People are odd ! I met up with a friend on condition we pay our own bills
One morning she insisted on paying , sprinted to the till in fact ! , next time I returned the compliment , she was very annoyed and has avoided me since , I miss the chat !
What did I do wrong ?

Smileless2012

Why not ask the total cost once the taxi driver knows where all the drop off points are going to be, and then divide the cost equally between the number of passengers?

Why is it being assumed that this is a ploy to make a smaller contribution? Just because she confidently takes holidays abroad on her own, doesn't mean she takes taxis on her own.

I wouldn't take a taxi on my own at night unless I knew the taxi firm and the driver.

My youngest daughter has been abroad on her own a fair few times and is perfectly confident in lots of situations but she gets scared of being driven in a taxi alone at night and I can understand this! I once took a taxi home late from work dark winter evening and the driver ranted the whole way about his ex girl friend and wound up the tale with how he and some friends had gone round to her house to verbally abuse her. To be fair I was very scared as he seemed extremely volatile and potentially aggressive!

It's one of those awkward social situations that someone else has instigated but you feel you should deal with it! Some people seem to blithely take it for granted that the rest of the world should accommodate them. Not so - but they also don't seem to know when to take a diplomatic hint.

Ourkidl OP's husband gives several of the ladies a lift to the venue. As stated by the OP, they all return by taxi, driven by a taxi driver. Not the husband of the OP.

I'm confused ... is your husband the taxi driver?

Why don't you just tell her how you are feeling and ask a direct question? If she was a long standing friend of mine I'd give her the chance to explain. She might have a real phobia of being in a taxi alone at night or she might have real money worries and if she was my friend I'd want to know that. If she's just mean with money surely after many years you'd know that? It's obviously bothering you enough to post about it, just ask her and put your POV.

You should just ask her if it is unreasonable to ask her for additional fare in exchange for you taking the extended trip to see she is home safely. I am surprised she hasn't offered this. She said it was a taxi fear; not a money issue. You are kind to accommodate thus far. What if you were afraid to be the last one in the taxi? Then what?

You might be right Welbeck. That's why it's been praying on my mind. I don't wish to be unkind or thoughtless but I would also like a bit of consideration

taking buses or trains is quite different from riding alone in a taxi with a male driver.
the first is more public and seems safer.
i can understand having reservations about the taxi.
also why assume she is mean; perhaps she has much less money than the rest of you, and it is gradually running down.
she might have been living on dwindling savings, esp as a single person, one can feel quite vulnerable.
and however well you think you know her, such people often will hide the reality of their circumstances, esp from friends, and like to keep up routines socialising.
i know whereof i speak.

Macadia

Keys poked through fingers. I remember, too.

Wouldn't it be nice if there was a woman-driver&passenger only, taxi service? Some countries have women-only trains. What a relief that would be for me. (no offence intended to any men on this forum - I know that over 99% of men are kind - it's the 1% that I try to avoid.)

I would welcome a woman only taxi service and I'm amazed there isn't one. I catch taxis fairly frequently for work meetings (parking is a nightmare in Bristol) and there have been a few times I've felt uneasy. I'm very far from nervous or paranoid but you are effectively locked in a strange man's car.

I don't know why, but I'm taxi-phobic. Love travelling on trains & buses & not phobic about airports although I get nervous. I have no idea why this is, but rather than be on my own in the taxi I would get out and walk home. At one time I wouldn't use them at all, even with someone else, but I had to for one job I had & now I am tense but tolerable if someone else is with me.
Having said all that, your friend probably is just tight!

My friend is a single lady, which is why I'm happy to offer lifts. She often has days out by herself on the train or the bus which is why I'm skeptical about her being nervous about being in a taxi by herself. We always use the same local taxi company.

Keys poked through fingers. I remember, too.

Wouldn't it be nice if there was a woman-driver&passenger only, taxi service? Some countries have women-only trains. What a relief that would be for me. (no offence intended to any men on this forum - I know that over 99% of men are kind - it's the 1% that I try to avoid.)

I was about to say if she has a partner/husband could the men share the lifts to the venue .
I have a group of friends and when we go out the husbands drop us at the restaurant and we get an Uber back . The app gives the total which we divide amongst us and give cash to the person whose account it is . Unfortunately there’s always one woman who never has the cash and says I’ll give it to you when I see you next , but never does. All of us except her have the Uber app as she claims she can’t work it out !!! . So we take it in turns to order an Uber .
Back to your friend , I’m usually the last to get dropped off and sit there with my phone ready to call if a problem and my house keys poked through my fingers . A habit from my younger single days .
I also let me friends know when I’m home .

*Your

You're responsibility is to get yourself home. She can ride with you to your home and perhaps her husband can collect her at your home since she doesn't want to ride the remaining journey alone in a taxi. It really is her choice to go out and it is not your problem that her home is a bit further down the road. That is her decision if she wants to have a night out knowing that she must take a solo taxi trip home. She can chat on the phone with you during her ride if that makes her feel safer.

I wouldn't necessarily assume that her motives are financial. If she's normally the type to duck out of bills then maybe, but otherwise it could easily be that she just doesn't like being on her own in the taxi. People do get ideas about things like that, whether they seem reasonable to others or not. It wouldn't bother me, but there are other things I'd rather do or not do that others might find odd.

If you're not comfortable with being alone in the taxi either, however, then you need to find a way round it - maybe take turns, or see if you can get a firm that sends female drivers.

If she is the 'last to the bar and first out of the door' type, then you could ask for a fixed price taxi and get her to pay half when she gets in (or before you leave).

Also, does she have a husband who could take his turn in dropping you off? It doesn't seem fair that you organise the outward journey every time.