Sometimes I despair.

I have often told my children how cross I'm was about money I wasted on an "educational" toy from Tupperware which was a set of increasingly smaller pots to stack one inside the other*. My DH doesn't seem to understand the concept of stacking smaller things on top of larger things either.

* This was a little tongue-in-cheek, though.

Why didn't you just ask her where she had put them? She probably didn't realise that she had put them in the wrong place when she was trying to help you by clearing up afterwards!!

All the best crockery should be out on display. Don't you have one of those Welsh dressers?
Personally, I don't think they are anything special, but then we all have different tastes.

Best to check on the stacking of all the china.
A friend's mother had 12 of everything in her china cupboards; when she died and the relatives came to share it out many items of all sizes, unused for many years at the bottom of the pile, were cracked or broken because of the weight of the stack.

I am quietly despairing too...but not about plates.

Some usual suspects if course.

Your post might not be unkind, petra, but some, I’m afraid, come across as such in my opinion.

Yes, of course there are dreadful things going on in this world of ours so that it might seem as if a worry about the positioning of plates is not something to get upset about; but the point is, for the OP, it was something to get upset about, and for all we know, it might have been the last straw for her, as we don’t know what she is coping with in her life. For goodness sake, a little kindness wouldn’t go amiss, surely, and if all you can think of is a reply along the lines of a fuss about nothing, or there are worse things in the world to worry about, then perhaps it might be kinder to keep those remarks to yourself, because for that OP, it is something to worry about.

I think Monica has summed it up well.

Are you being unreasonable? Well not to think it strange that DD couldn't recognise your favourite plates and to treat them with respect!

I have something slightly similar happening here .
My DS and his DP are at long last clearing their possessions from my attic.
Half of these are going to charity, the rest to the tip apart from a few treasures they will take to NZ with them or have them sent out.
It is an emotional journey for them and DS gets quite grumpy.

I was asked if I wanted to keep their trunks for my own storage and when I said no that was definitely the wrong answer!

Photos of the trunks have now been sent to other family members who are telling me to keep them.
Life is hard enough without being told by my DC what I should keep.

I may keep them but honestly I have my own decluttering to do without having to think about theirs.

I have another 2 trunks incidentally, which do mean something to me.

I know these are only "things" but the memories they can evoke are overwhelming.

MOnica
This thread is headed AIBU. That is a question, is it not?
Some of us think the op was being unreasonable.
When posting under AIBU you should surely expect that some posters will think, yes, YABU.

Oh what a lot of virtue signalling is going on on this thread.

The little irritations of life are the ones that bother us most and the OPs frustration is entirely understandable. When you have something precious, whether a set of plates, a ring or a book. The last thing you want is someone doing something that might damage them.

Of course there are far worse problems in the world, we are not stupid and uncaring, but there is very little I can do about the conflict in Gaza, beyond donate money. Nor is it happening in my back yard. But DS dropping his socks randomly round the house when he visits, so that I can find them after he has gone home, infuriates me because it effects me directly, here and now.

kircubbin2000 I am entirely on your side.

Ziplok

It’s sad to see so much unkindness on this thread. So, some of you don’t see the plates as important, the OP obviously does. There’s no need to be unkind about it to her.

Some comments ( including mine) are not meant to be unkind.
It’s just a fact that some of us can’t get in a state of despair over some side plates so therefore disagreed with the op.
I would say the same ( but be more honest) with friends and family.

👏👏👏

People are dying, people are starving in the world, does it really matter whether the plates are on top. on the bottom or in another room of course it doesn’t

Germanshepherdsmum

What a huge fuss over absolutely nothing.

Oh the times I say that 🤦🏼‍♀️

Germanshepherdsmum

What a huge fuss over absolutely nothing.

I do not think it is a fuss about nothing. The last thing you need after being ill is to have to sort through your cupboards and have to put things back where they belong.

Surely it must be easier to return items to the place you took them from than find another place to put them.

It’s sad to see so much unkindness on this thread. So, some of you don’t see the plates as important, the OP obviously does. There’s no need to be unkind about it to her.

Lively plates, but what the heck!

My crockery cupboard looks like the Leaning Tower of Pisa with small, large, medium plates and bowls balancing precariously.

I annoy myself when I put things back like this, normally during a lazy spell - occasionally I sort it all out nicely then it gradually goes back.

As it's now confirmed this is a 'lighthearted' post can one assume describing the plates as 'lovely' is included in the lightheartedness.

Germanshepherdsmum

Your daughter looked after you following an op and you’re complaining about where she put your ‘lovely’ plates?

I agree with the sentiment of this post but not the way it was expressed. Or the inverted commas …

I agree.

I agree Baggs. If the OP was meant to be lighthearted, the initial poster could have have given an indication that it was. Then perhaps we wouldn't have wasted time responding, or responded differently.

Once one knows exactly what was meant, the title wordking isn't a problem but I have to admit my very first reaction was Gosh! what a fuss about some plates.

They weren't "squashed" either.

I have actually "squashed" a plate or two in my time with careless putting away – my own thankfully.

"Despair" is a very strong word. Recent wider family suicide to cope with.

Maybe add LH (light-hearted) to the title so that there is no misunderstanding. People cannot 'hear' tone on the printed page.

I honestly did not think the OP was upset or complaining, just bemused that the heavy plates were stacked on top of those small one's.
I have a lovely partner who tells me I do things left handed, and he does it this way. I am never offended, I seize the moment and say oh OK you had better do it then. Win Win.
Oh just to add I am right handed. I would not want to offend people who are left handed.