Adult daughter. AIBU?

Your daughter is neurodiverse so maybe being disorganised and forgetting things others consider important is part of who she is. Also the fall sounds nasty so maybe that should take priority right now.

Ziggy, many people nowadays don't bother with adults' birthdays. You daughter is remarkable for paying you such attentions as she does. You are indeed being unreasonable so don'i let this trivial matter trouble you any longer.

Mothers are allowed to send cards etc to daughters just because they want to , even when not reciprocated

YABVVU.

Don't be upset .
Have a good cry and then -think about it .
If your daughter is neurodiverse in some way then all is explained .
She couldn't get a card and presents organised and hurt herself .She did send you a photo of her badly bruised legs .
I'd be more concerned that she'd fallen .
So take a deep breath and send her a card and some flowers/chocolates .
Forget the wedding day upset and try to move on .....

I have a neurally diverse son. he has done wonderfully well following the profession he decided he wanted to follow when he was only 4.

I usually get a birthday card - sometime or another, and any present probably a month or two later ( he is a more efficient since he married), but to be honest I couldn't give toss. He is a loving son, who is there if really needed, a loving husband and father and highly regarded in his profession. What price a birthday card? - very little.

I wouldn’t give a toss whether I had any flowers for my birthday - I’d be more concerned about my daughter being injured. You pass over that as though it’s nothing and you really don’t care very much - you’re just upset that it prevented you from getting a present. You come across as very self-centred and unkind.

Have you asked how she is, how the fall happened, whether her injuries have been assessed, whether she needs help with anything?

What your background information has to do with anything I don’t know… maybe she was upset you didn’t talk to her very much. But what’s that got to do with the present issue?

Sorry, I think you are being very self -centered. She will be more concerned about her bad fall, and she did let you know that she couldn't find your present. You have had a long time to understand your daughter.

You posted some time ago about your loveless childhood and how it’s affected your life.
Now you’re more concerned about a birthday card than your daughter.
Maybe take a look in the mirror.

Yes, YABU! Have you even bothered to check in with her to see if she is ok?

How is she?
It sounds a nasty fall.

Afraid I agree with the last two posters
She had a nasty fall and you ve heard nothing since !!! And you’re more worried about a missing birthday card ?

What RosieandherMaw and tanith said

Personally I wouldn’t give the lack of birthday stuff another thought I’d want to know how and why she fell and if she was ok. Isn’t that what most Mums do!

Aren't you more worried that she hurt herself? I know I would be and I think most mums would too, whether our children are 5 or 35
As for the wedding day anecdote, you sound as if you just want to justify yourself.