70th Birthday Party

I’m a bit surprised you would break friendships over this, Hippie20, unless there were other issues and this was a final straw. I get a bit overwhelmed by organising stuff sometimes and as a result have double-booked things, which is mortifying! Maybe one or both of your errant friends did this.
It really does depend on their circumstances, as others have said. Maybe they didn’t have a choice about holiday dates for some reason. I expect they felt sad about missing your party, but perhaps had other people in the mix. It’s not easy when things clash.
If you’ve ditched your friends of 20 years just over this, it does rather seem to be cutting off your nose to spite your face. Friends are precious even if they disappoint us sometimes. I just hope my lovely friends will forgive me if I slip up somehow- we can all do it! It will be sad if you have regrets further down the line. Time passes & perceived slights don’t matter so much. All the best.

Although I was very lucky that my family and friends made a big fuss for my 90th birthday, I really don't understand why there is so much angst when family/friends do not make a fuss, it is only another day!!

I'm not sure if I would be disgruntled about it or not. I would certainly be disappointed.

For me, it would be more important to have my family there - and, of course, I would like to see all my friends but understand that sometimes it is not possible.

I also turn 70 next month😱. Where has the time gone! Personally I want nothing.. Had my family warned...no surprise party!!!! I don't need anything either... I think you are being a bit unreasonable....enjoy your party with who you've got coming to it.

My thoughts exactly Witzend.
I would imagine that's the source of the reason for celebrating 70.

Did you send an invitation to your 70th birthday celebration before they booked the holiday Hippie20?

Aldom

*4allweknow*. It's very common for people to make a special occasion of a 70th birthday. I know lots of people who have had big parties for their 70th. It's considered a milestone I think.

Yes, because of the ‘three score years and ten’ in the Bible - whether anyone’s remotely religious or not.

Unless they have deliberately booked the holidays after receiving your party invitation then I think you are being rather over sensitive about this.
Move on, don’t fallout with people simply because their values don’t measure up to yours …. That’s simply childish.
Have your party, enjoy yourself but don’t cut off your nose to spite your face.

Should add I don’t want a 70th..so many loved friends and family have passed .. would rather go away for a short break if possible with heath issues

Outcast52

I think some posters on here are being rather unfair in their comments. OP is having a 70th birthday party, which is rather different to simply celebrating it as any other birthday might be. A party inevitably takes much more organisation, is usually planned well in advance and is almost certain to be more expensive than an ordinary birthday celebration. I don't think you are being unreasonable in feeling hurt, but you are by falling out permanently with them. I hope you have a lovely time anyway.

Could be a "bring a bottle" party in her kitchen for all we know. Often the best kind.

Am not going to celebrate my 70th next year with a party… have learned from previous parties.. it’s now considered an ‘old tired tradition’

I think some posters on here are being rather unfair in their comments. OP is having a 70th birthday party, which is rather different to simply celebrating it as any other birthday might be. A party inevitably takes much more organisation, is usually planned well in advance and is almost certain to be more expensive than an ordinary birthday celebration. I don't think you are being unreasonable in feeling hurt, but you are by falling out permanently with them. I hope you have a lovely time anyway.

Perhaps you’re being a little oversensative? There may be other reasons why they have booked their holiday at this time.Please draw a line under it and move on. Enjoy celebrating with everyone who joins you. My 70 th was during lockdown 😔

Make the most of it. I had to cancel my 80th altogether, even though everything was bought and ordered, due to covid!

I would only be upset if two friends went away together to specifically avoid my birthday event!

People usually go on holiday with family or friends at a time that suits the majority, their purses and availability of the venue, tickets etc.

I certainly wouldn’t feel slighted if people were inadvertently on holiday when I planned a party.

Can you have a separate lunch or similar with the two friends who can’t come to your 70th, unless they are actually trying to avoid you?

😎

4allweknow. It's very common for people to make a special occasion of a 70th birthday. I know lots of people who have had big parties for their 70th. It's considered a milestone I think.

Strangely, in a hotel with brother this week having coffee and cake. We noticed a van arriving in car park and a couple unloading balloons on strings, including a large 7 and 0. Commented probably a 70th birthday celebration. Both of us thought it unusual to have a special celebration for a 70th. Tried to think of what is significant about 70 but otger than living past 69 couldn't think of anything. However, if you had issued invitations to your friends and they had accepted then can understand your disappointment. Perhaps they are going with family who have made the arrangements not knowing about your invitation.

I should add that we don't necessarily celebrate on the day, it's often not convenient for those who are still working.

My daughter remembers our birthdays and always encourages us to do something, often just a family meal. Recently we had a large lunch party in a restaurant for our neighbours, we did enjoy it but I doubt if we'd have done it without her gentle pushing.

I have never celebrated my birthday with friends just family on the actual day or any other day we can make it. I recently had my 80 birthday and did not even see my family on the day itself. You can celebrate together any time if you wish. I am never too bothered I think you are being extrenely unreasonable

Family meal out for 70th here, not mine but his. Special cake and that’s it! No expectations of anyone else.

Hippie 20
Least you are having a celebration. It’s my 70th birthday in a few days and the only thing planned is that I’m going to a concert alone. Family birthday planned anything. Not self pitying, just the way it is but yes, I do feel a little hurt. Nevermind.

Yes, YABU. Lots of different factors are at play when booking a holiday and if these 2 friends aren't a couple then the number of factors increases. Very different if say a wedding was booked and you'd sent out save the date cards but this is just a b'day albeit important to you.
Wish them a great holiday and enjoy your party!

Ziggy62 I agree with you.

Hippie20

Interesting. My own view is 70th is an important milestone and true friends would prioritise it over a a holiday with casual friends. And in my case those long term friends are no longer friends as they did not value our friendship..

How childish. I think this is about not getting your own way. I came to the conclusion a long time ago, that it's not all about me.
A holiday to them is important, they can celebrate with you another time.