DH holidaying in USA when I have been diagnosed with heart disease.

imaround

I am sorry about your recent diagnosis. It must feel very frustrating for your husband to choose now to travel.

I am happy to answer any questions or research concerns you may have with his being in the Southern US from my side of the pond if you would like. I know the US seems scary right now, but millions of people live here each day safely. You are welcome to PM me privately so as not to divulge personal travel information.

I am going to be blunt, so I apologize for my American bluntness, but is he white and does he speak English? If so, he won't have a problem as long as he has proper ID and travel documents and doesn't try to earn income while here.

Americans are a lovely people overall, and Southern hospitality is second to none. And the food is out of this world! I recommend a true Southern style biscuit and gravy (American biscuits, not English ones )

My bigger concern would be to have some type of emergency health insurance. If he gets sick or injured, medical treatment could bankrupt you. A single surgery can cost hundreds of thousands of dollars. If he needs simple medical care while here. Have him find an Urgent care vs going to an ER (A &E). Total cost would be an office visit (plus meds), which would be less than $200.

If he is coming in the summer. It will be hot and very humid based on location. We do make use of air conditioning as much as possible, especially in the South, so that helps.

I hope he has a wonderful time, I hope you get stabilized quickly and can't wait to hear how his US Southern experience went!

I don’t think Margomar is concerned about how her husband will fare in the USA, but rather part of her anxiety is how SHE will manage on her own.

What a reassuring, helpful post i’maround! 👍🏼

Let him go. Health Insurance must have cost him a fortune as well as it's a lot for US. Surely you are still able to do for yourself? Have you got family nearby or someone you can call if need be.

A straight answer to your question: Am I being unreasonable?
Yes I think you are.
Go to your medical practice and ask for information about your diagnosis, possible side effects and risks, and see if it is safe for you to be on your own.
Do you have a family member or friend who could stay for a time, or as someone suggested, hire care workers for a short period?
Would you really feel happy about depriving your husband of a long awaited trip?

butterandjam

@Eloethan

Is your heart condition being treated effectively? If so, and your GP confirmed it would be OK for you to go, and you are able to obtain full health insurance, I think it would be better if you went with him.

Why? She never wanted to go with him when she was well:

"I’m not keen on flying and when I was well I encouraged him to book this trip on his own."

Yes I agree, this is most definitely the DHs holiday, no reason for the OP to tag along when it probably isn’t her thing and she isn’t keen on flying, also she has just been diagnosed with a heart condition so I imagine, despite there being suitable if expensive insurance, that she wants to process what that condition means in terms of her quality of life.

I personally wouldn't go. But if you do go.
I would get these best, most comprehensive travel insurance you can find with no excess.

Medical bills in the States can run into hundreds of thousands of pounds.

@Eloethan

Is your heart condition being treated effectively? If so, and your GP confirmed it would be OK for you to go, and you are able to obtain full health insurance, I think it would be better if you went with him.

Why? She never wanted to go with him when she was well:

"I’m not keen on flying and when I was well I encouraged him to book this trip on his own."

What a wonderful trip for your husband, but what a potential worry for you. Could he perhaps shorten his trip by a week or so? That might make it less anxiety producing for you, 3 weeks is a long time and he will be a long way away.

On the other hand, according to the British Heart Foundation (BHF), 800,000 people in the UK have coronary or ischaemic heart disease, and I suspect quite a few of them have a husband, wife or partner who is away for a holiday or work travel at any one time with no unhappy consequences.

I think I would discuss my husbands trip with my GP and or cardiologist, who may have some very sensible suggestions but who may sit very firmly on the fence and not give any travel advice! And because I don’t really like being in our house on my own, I would anyway get someone to stay with me while my husband was away.

Hope it all goes well 🌷🌷🌷


www.bhf.org.uk/informationsupport/conditions/coronary-heart-disease

I certainly wouldn’t try and stop my DH from going on a trip that he’s always wanted to do, or even to shorten it. Some good advice here, particularly having a chat with your GP on what symptoms you may encounter.

I also would want to make sure he has adequate travel insurance. I hope he goes and has a wonderful time, and maybe you’ll enjoy being on your own for a short while doing exactly what you want!

My DH is planning a trip away. I may well have just had a joint replacement. I don’t want him to miss his longed for trip. I am thinking of employing home instead carers on a one off basis while he is away.

Basgetti

Macaydia

Please let him.There is no worry about ICE if you are not brown-skinnned. Doctors can take care of you. Your DH is not a doctor.

Whilst it’s extraordinarily unlikely that an 81 year old British tourist in Nashville would be at any risk, please don’t forget Renee Good.

My DH has longed to go to USA to visit great music venues in the South
Margomar's DH is planning to visit the South of the USA, far from Minneapolis.

If he stays in the tourist areas and, as I suggested, books tours rather than doing his own thing, I'm sure he will be fine.

A Po Boy is a great sandwich. New Orleans has amazing Cajun and Creole food! And the pastries!

Definitely sample some BBQ while here as well. American BBQ is like its own food class and it is different in every region of the US. BBQ you have in Louisiana will be much different than BBQ you have in Missouri.

I am well thank you! Keeping my head down and trying to maintain my sanity in this world as long as possible. It is almost time to start my vegetables garden, so I am trying to stay absorbed with that.

Hope you all are well where you are!

Macaydia

Please let him.There is no worry about ICE if you are not brown-skinnned. Doctors can take care of you. Your DH is not a doctor.

Whilst it’s extraordinarily unlikely that an 81 year old British tourist in Nashville would be at any risk, please don’t forget Renee Good.

It’s his dream. Send him off with a smile and find someone to support you. It is a few weeks. Maybe you need to pay for someone to call in twice day.

Very kind of you imaround.
On our visits to the US we have never gone to the Southern States, have been to California - North and South, Washington DC, NYC where we lived for a brief time many moons ago, Connecticut and Maine, Boston and Chicago.
I believe - if the OPs DH visits New Orleans which we always wanted to do, he should try a sandwich called Po Boys. Have heard a lot about it but never had one.
Hope you and yours are ok atm.

I would let him go. Presumably you are being treated for your condition and you haven’t mentioned needing help with any daily tasks such as getting in and out of bed, showering or climbing stairs?

Order groceries in if necessary and buy some nice ready meals so that you don’t have to bother much. If you’re not able to keep the house clean, get an agency involved for a once only clean?

I am sorry about your recent diagnosis. It must feel very frustrating for your husband to choose now to travel.

I am happy to answer any questions or research concerns you may have with his being in the Southern US from my side of the pond if you would like. I know the US seems scary right now, but millions of people live here each day safely. You are welcome to PM me privately so as not to divulge personal travel information.

I am going to be blunt, so I apologize for my American bluntness, but is he white and does he speak English? If so, he won't have a problem as long as he has proper ID and travel documents and doesn't try to earn income while here.

Americans are a lovely people overall, and Southern hospitality is second to none. And the food is out of this world! I recommend a true Southern style biscuit and gravy (American biscuits, not English ones )

My bigger concern would be to have some type of emergency health insurance. If he gets sick or injured, medical treatment could bankrupt you. A single surgery can cost hundreds of thousands of dollars. If he needs simple medical care while here. Have him find an Urgent care vs going to an ER (A &E). Total cost would be an office visit (plus meds), which would be less than $200.

If he is coming in the summer. It will be hot and very humid based on location. We do make use of air conditioning as much as possible, especially in the South, so that helps.

I hope he has a wonderful time, I hope you get stabilized quickly and can't wait to hear how his US Southern experience went!

V3ra

^It didn’t affect me getting insurance, but it stated that in the event of something happening to her due to the condition, we weren’t covered, (I assume flying back early etc), as V3ra says.^

Indeed. And potentially more of a consideration for a spouse than a daughter-in-law 😕

We were covered, never even thought about checking if we were covered for MIL, who was elderly and had been unwell for years. We had to cancel a few days before a long haul flight and we did get our money back for flights and hotel bookings (eventually from the airline!).

It didn’t affect me getting insurance, but it stated that in the event of something happening to her due to the condition, we weren’t covered, (I assume flying back early etc), as V3ra says.

Indeed. And potentially more of a consideration for a spouse than a daughter-in-law 😕

Details of travel requirements
www.gov.uk/foreign-travel-advice/usa/entry-requirements

Tell him to try to avoid any World Cup venues if possible!

I am getting more and more anxious about him going partly due to the actions of ICE in the states, and also because I am scared stiff that I won’t manage on my own because of my newly diagnosed ischaemic heart disease

I wouldn't worry about ICE, just make sure he has the right documentation for his visit, which I believe is an ESTA for UK passport holders. Is he going on an organised trip when he gets there or doing his own thing? An organised tour of the venues might be a good idea.
Travel insurance is essential and you should both read the small print.

I hope by then you will feel less anxious and more able to see how well you can manage; follow medical advice and make sure you have someone you can call on should you feel unwell at all.

V3ra

BlueBelle

Isn’t that only if you are genetically related to them Calandergirl? How could Margonas health effect her husbands insurance they are not genetically related

It could be that he would need to cancel or cut short his trip, if something happened to her that meant he had to change his plans.

My DIL has a chronic health condition, when I completed my travel insurance questionnaire, it asked about any health issues of family members. So I put it down.

It didn’t affect me getting insurance, but it stated that in the event of something happening to her due to the condition, we weren’t covered, (I assume flying back early etc), as V3ra says.

BlueBelle

Isn’t that only if you are genetically related to them Calandergirl? How could Margonas health effect her husbands insurance they are not genetically related

It could be that he would need to cancel or cut short his trip, if something happened to her that meant he had to change his plans.

I think that I'd wouldn't any pressure on him to cancel or shorten his trip.
You hopefully have family and friends to support you .

My father wanted to go on a trip to Canada and planned it and my mother absolutely refused to go and wouldn't even discuss it .
He cancelled his much longed for trip and said nothing .
Looking back ,I recall that she'd decided to go out as little as possible.
She refused to go out in the evenings as well.

But what is "recent" anyway?
That was my point earlier - I suggested speaking to her GP (about being safe whilst he was away).

It wasn't me who suggested taking the trip with him - but if her medical team and insurance company thinks it is acceptable then the sailing idea isn't unreasonable in my opinion.