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AIBU

Mind her own...business...

(39 Posts)
GrannyOrNanny Mon 20-Jan-20 19:06:19

I work part time in an office (team of two) and the other team has recently lost a worker who has moved on leaving the other lady on her own. My colleague has suggested I work my Friday to help this lady....as I work part time (my colleague works nearly full time).

As much as I hate to see someone struggling...I very much like my Friday to myself. There is another team of six (slightly different job to us ) and they are always talking!

Am I being unreasonable?

Susan56 Mon 20-Jan-20 19:10:35

I would say stick to your guns.If there is too much work for this lady to cope with then another person should be employed to help her.If you like having your Friday to yourself you won’t be happy and would possibly resent this lady.Good luck💐

Namsnanny Mon 20-Jan-20 19:10:38

Well, it doesn't seem so from what you've said.

The point is can you realistically suggest others take over the Friday slot, without hurting anyone's feelings?
Or are you obliged to do as you have been asked?

love0c Mon 20-Jan-20 19:11:05

Difficult one! Do they mean every Friday or just one? If every Friday I would say sorry but you have other commitments. It saves any bad feeling, not that there should be any but I do so remember colleagues can be very jealous! You work part time, they don't! If they are short staffed it is up to the management to sort out anyway. it is not for you to sort out.

GrannyOrNanny Mon 20-Jan-20 19:16:08

Whilst there’s no obligation I’m miffed that it’s my colleague suggesting I do the extra hours! The management are dreadful and our Team Manager always seems to be off sick, on a course, at head office....not where she should be!

I agree love0c others can be jealous ...you are so right there...

Tedber Mon 20-Jan-20 19:22:08

You are absolutely not being unreasonable. From what you say you haven't been approached by managers even, just your colleague? How do you know they are planning on replacing the other person even?

I would say nothing. Carry on doing the hours you are contracted for and IF a senior manager asks if you would like extra hours just say no you are happy as you are.

As much as you might want to help colleagues, it really isn't your problem.

Namsnanny Mon 20-Jan-20 19:26:42

Oh! I see now. It's extra hours to your normal working week.

Stick with your original arrangements if you can. At least talk about it again.
If your colleague doesn't have seniority (just feels to her that she does because she works full time), it's a bit of a cheek her asking you, IMO isn't it?)

MawB Mon 20-Jan-20 19:29:50

Just smile and say you have other commitments on Fridays.
Presumably you have a contract which says which days you work.
If they want to change your conditions of employment you are not obliged to agree.

GrannyOrNanny Mon 20-Jan-20 19:36:45

I do believe they will be looking at replacing her but couldn’t agree more...it really isn’t my problem. Unfortunately my colleague seems to think she has some sort of seniority position being (nearly) full time. Bloody cheek!
Thanks for the support x

TrendyNannie6 Mon 20-Jan-20 19:44:17

It’s not up to you to sort out not your problem, you work part time you enjoy your fridays to yourself, I would say sorry I’m afraid I have other commitments for the foreseeable future

sodapop Mon 20-Jan-20 19:53:06

Spot on Trendynannie6

Tangerine Mon 20-Jan-20 19:53:18

I think it is for your Manager to suggest it if she would like you to increase your hours. It isn't for your colleague to ask you to do it.

You used the word "suggested". Was she maybe just suggesting and thinking you might like the extra hours?

If you don't want to work Fridays, wait until your Manager asks you and then say you have other commitments.

I'd try and avoid discussing the matter with people in the meantime.

Good luck.

52bright Mon 20-Jan-20 20:00:17

I would definitely not agree to doing an extra day's work a week because another member of staff has moved on. It is management's job to get a replacement, not yours and definitely not your colleague's job to 'manage' you into the vacant slot.
All I can say is that from past experience, if you step into the breach the 'temporary' solution is very likely to turn into a 'permanent' solution. You took on the hours which suited you and the Company in good faith if the situation has changed it is for the management to resolve it in ways which suit both them and staff. A change in your hours clearly doesn't suit you so stick to your guns or you may find yourself in an untenable position.

Nansnet Tue 21-Jan-20 04:52:15

When I used to work, I also had every Friday off ... I loved having a longer weekend! No way would I have given it up, unless to help out in an emergency. Stick with what you're happy doing.

annep1 Tue 21-Jan-20 05:29:14

YANBU. Definitely not. It is not your problem. Tell your colleague you don't want to work Fridays and if approached by management don't make excuses that you have other comnitnents. Just be assertive and say no thank you. No need to say sorry.

timetogo2016 Tue 21-Jan-20 08:29:45

Susan56 is spot on.

Hetty58 Tue 21-Jan-20 09:19:22

It's not your colleague's place to even suggest it. You work part time - on the days that you're available.

Madmaggie Tue 21-Jan-20 10:31:38

Grannyornanny I've been in similar situation myself when I was working. With the benefit of hindsight I would suggest - put yourself first because no one else is going to, in fact sounds like they're happy to take advantage of your good nature and that is usually the thin end of the wedge work wise. Work one or two Fridays 'to help out' and before you know it, it's become the norm. Having Fridays as your day off was always jealously guarded where I worked as everyone wanted it so it made a long weekend. And the backbiting was awful. If your colleague can't cope it's management's problem not yours - although I'm sure they'd happily 'permit' you to solve it for them!! Assert yourself or, throw in the towel. You do not have to explain to anyone how you spend your Fridays, it's your day off - end of. Wishing you well.

Callistemon Tue 21-Jan-20 10:36:29

Perhaps she thought she should offer you the opportunity first rather than you think 'why did she ask them and not me'.
Presumably you would be paid in full for the extra hours.

Perhaps she knows you will do a better job.

If you don't want to do it just say 'thank you for the opportunity, but I have other commitments and cannot do more than the hours I do at present'.

Callistemon Tue 21-Jan-20 10:37:29

They need to recruit someone else as one person is not a team!

Callistemon Tue 21-Jan-20 10:39:19

Sorry, I missed that she is your colleague not the manager.
It is not up to her.

Pantglas2 Tue 21-Jan-20 10:48:21

Madmaggie you are so right about the backbiting that goes on with full timers thinking that part timers should be doing more work! I kept having to point out that I earned half their wages but they refused to see it!

LuckyFour Tue 21-Jan-20 11:55:53

Could you offer to do the Friday slot for say a couple of months until someone else is found to fill it. Say you don't want it to be permanent but will do it till Easter (for instance).

sarahellenwhitney Tue 21-Jan-20 12:19:56

Granny or Nanny
I personally, at times, in my working life felt used and ceased being 'available'. Why should it be you who fills a gap ?.My attitude will without a doubt to some appear selfish, but I would want to know' What's in it for me'?

EthelJ Tue 21-Jan-20 12:32:59

Do you mean you have been asked to work an extra day? If you dont want to say no. You are under no obligation to do it.
As for people being jealous because you work part time. They shouldn't you work part time and get part time money. They work full time and get more salary. I used to work part time and it used to drive me crazy that people used to expect me to have a full time workload and do as much as someone working full time when I was being paid for part time!