How many Grandads do we have?

Piano lol

Candlesticks on side of the jeni

????????

Hatstands jeni always handy to hang discarded clothing when the atmosphere turns warm and fuggy

Today Isiah meets with his probation officer to decide how long he should keep his tag on for....at the interview he told Lil it was a BEN 10 watch specially designed because of his withered arm....it wasn't until later Lil realised that the proffered Limb wasn't in fact an arm...which is why she hired him on the spot to collect the jugs with handles thinking that in busy times the extra help would be cost effective..Lil has put him on a short term contract,in case he is recalled to the big house...

Don't forget to polish the brass candlesticks that swing out on either side! They remind me of something? I can't think what?

Lil is recruiting a person to play the ancient piano found under many dust sheets at the back of the coal cupboard,she is not sure if it should go into the public or the saloon it is a bit battle scarred like most of the instruments that pass through Lils hands and is wondering if you the regulars would take a vote on where it should go,the beer stains and burn marks should polish out nicely if not she will slap a bit of gloss paint on it and stress it and Flip Flop Flo has offered to do some decoupage on it....well think that's what she offered....and crochet a few beer mats to hide the worst...don't forget to add your suggestions .....

Hiya Frankel and Snapshot - Welcome to this zany other world! I started just after Lil's Bar opened, just over a year ago.I think I'm being "miss used" by some particularLadies here, but with my memory probs I always seem to forget the best bits! Only bloke till now is Pete, who is forever trying to keep me out of trouble!! Good bloke is Pete!

Nice to have you aboard Or "a broad" (these Gals!)

Isiah is a curmudgeonly old devil he keeps slipping of to the gents to powder his nose,and be found round the back by the bins having a crafty fag,and a swig from his hip flask that he fills up from the bar when Lil isn't looking,she is thinking of letting him go if he doesn't reach his full potential as pot man and sawdust operative...

nellie, I'm sure that between them, (back to back possibly?) Lil and Flip-Flop can render the place dust and cobweb-free for the odd discerning gentleman. They might even get Isiah to shovel in a new layer of sawdust!

Lil says she detects a naughtical flavour here,and started reminiscing about a close liaison she enjoyed with a matelot from Plymouth she misunderstood when invited to touch his dickie for luck,the swift right hook she gave him earned her a night in the cells and a stain on her character as she was bound over to keep the peace and pay a 15 bob fine...
Now as for I cal crisps she is unable to source these at the wholesaler but she is assured like most things if you don't enjoy it,it doesn't count as a sin.
Our Lil favours a man of class who prefers a G &T she feels it gives mooning on the square a touch of elegance and she is going to clear the saloon bar of cobwebs especially for you,and leave the public bar to the beer and ale drinkers....

Oh snapshot where's your sense of adventure? Sampling the Ample Bosom and exploring the Nun's Knickers might stir you into taking some vigorous exercise, which would burn lots of calories!

Nice one Frankel, I agree, I haven't spied a grump as yet, not that I wish to of course! .. Well, my boat is always ready to float, so let's weigh anchor and chart a course to brighter times .. do we have any ONE-CAL crisps on offer in this hostelry? .. I'm trying to lose a stone or two so no pork scratchings for me! .. and I'm not sure I could thoroughly investigate Ample Bosoms or Nuns Knickers without spilling my G&T so maybe they'll keep for another day ...

frankel we are pleased to have another grandad to frequent Lils,hopefully you are partial to some Ample Bosom or even Nuns knickers to tickle your fancy..whatever your pleasure Lil,Flo,and Isiah will give you a warm welcome as only they how ...

Frankel, I'm afraid you are under a misapprehension. There are no ladies in Grandad's Shed - perish the thought! If you are referring to the Meals on Wheels person who ministered to gramps during his time of affliction, that was Lil from the local pub, who can best be described as a Jill of All Trades - but certainly not a 'lady'!

Hello, Snapshot. I too am a recent joiner and a Grandan (X2). From what I have seen so far, Grandads are a small, but not a persecuted, minority. The ladies here do not seem like 'Grumpy Old Women', always blaming the admittedly grumpy, Old Men. I would say that the site has a nice feel but if I did, I think any innuendo that could be squeezed out of these innocent words, would be. I joined because Age UK put me in touch and I wanted signatures on an e-petition for an effective Telephone Preference Service. I am still here. I feel a little like a teenager again, not quite sure of the female company but, so far, they seem not too threatening and fun. There is talk of a Shed for Grandads but it seems heavily populated with ladies - and thank heavens for that. The idea of being locked in a shed with a load of old blokes would be a resignation issue. Welcome and good luck!

Yep, snapshot...life on GN is far from dull. Haven't giggled so much in years.

Thankyou also Soop .. I can see you all much prefer smilies to frownies .. way to go I say

No chance with you around, nellie

Aww shucks love you too greatnan hope you feel better now,and it was a passing cloud...and my lovely soop I hate my friends to be sadxxxxx

Greatnan - you cannot fail to be uplifted when you read Nellie's latest escapades. I think that she's been blest with a marvellous sense of humour. I love her too.

Working on a Shed extension as we speak......

Nellie - I love you! I was feeling a bit down until I read this thread.

snapshot Welcome to us lot. Naughty Nellie will be so good for your sanity. If anyone can resuscitate a 'poor, tired, damaged mind' ...or any other wilting body part, our Nell most surely can.

LIl can pull a good one she has a fine tuned right arm honed to perfection over her years as a landlady....she also had plenty of practice as she did a short stint in a garage as a petrol pump attendant she was very deft at wiping her nozzle and shaking off the drips.....