Christmas running total and would DH have a clue?

We have just returned from buying our Christmas tree. We used to have two real ones, one in the big bay window in the study at the front of the house and another in the living room. But getting the one in the bay window in and out of the house without still finding little heaps of pine needles in corners in July has got so irritating (and expensive) that this year we have invested in a really nice artifical tree for the study but still got the real one for the living room where it stands in front of the French windows and can be got in and out without fuss or mess.

My dear OH has virtually no input in to Christmas on either the money or time front and probably has no idea what it costs either. I reckon I spend about the same as Coolgran65 on the family who remain to us: my mother, sister, BIL, three nieces, a son and a daughter. My husband and I have an agreement from when the children were small and we were skint that we don't do presents for each other but his birthday is two days after Christmas so a big fuss is made there with lots spent.

We also buy cheap Champagne and fizz on offer as there are always massive bargains to be had at Christmas. Recently we bought Champagne at £7.50 a bottle which is unbeatable. While this is meant to last throughout the year it's an extra expense.

I buy food ahead and store it. I have the turkey crown (frozen), stuffing, Christmas pudding and cheese biscuits. Nevertheless, the Christmas week's shop always costs double the normal amount and I think that it's because the shops put the prices up.

Goodness knows what we will do when the OH retires! By the way, I love Christmas because that's when I see my lovely family all together.

DH is generous to a fault, although he loves a bargain. He always buys too large a tree, and would like to be able to do all prep. on Christmas morning like Scrooge.

I wouldn't dare say as it includes me taking myself on a cruise. ( well it leaves darling daughter and her DH free to go to his family on the other side of the country and not have to worry about me! Well, that's my excuse!)

Aldi have teeny ones for£11:99 and larger for £19:99 they are Nordmann fir which I hope means they won't drop.!!

DH more or less leaves me to it. He does occasionally make small 'tutting' noises when he sees something else coming into the house, but it's easy to ignore that!
We'll be three on Christmas day, four for Boxing day, and just us two for the rest of the holidays, so I've cut back a lot on food this year. I've had enough of still wading through the Christmas goodies at Easter!!!

I only want a teeny tiny one ....

I am getting a real tree this year hooray, the one out of the loft has gone to the tip hooray again. It was bought in 1984 so deserved an honourable end (it didn't get one, it was an ignominious one).

M0nica you sound very well organised!!

The only thing DH moans about, I must admit, is when I wail every year like a child: 'but I want a real Christmas tree, not that one out of the attic

I am like Maggiemaybe. I have several spreadsheets! One the overall Christmas Plan, which includes, this years presents, shopping and cooking schedules and menus, budget and expenditure and another which is an archive of what we have given people in previous years so that I do not give anyone the same thing three years running. I do not bargain hunt over Christmas buying, at least no more than usual but I always ask for present wish lists so that money isn't wasted on unwanted gifts. There is no guarantee that items on the list will be given but it does at worst give a guide to what would be acceptable

My budget is around £750 for everything including presents, food and anything else that can be described as a Christmas expense and I usually stay within it. DH does pick up some expenses randomly. He usually buys any beer, wine or spirits, we are not a family where any of us drink much so this bill is not enormous, and he usually pays for the Christmas tree.

Thank you so much for this thread it has cheered me up no end. I have been married 33yrs and either paid for everything or asked for a 'bung'.

My DH has no idea of day to day costs let alone Christmas? I did 'suggest' any spare dosh he may have this month to field it my way and ...... Low and behold £200 arrived in my account. With alcohol, food, small gifts etc etc this is already gone. I think he thought it would 'cover Christmas' entirely feeding 6 adults, 2 children, gifts, fuel and everything else.

Brick wall and head me thinks!

I save my tesco club card vouchers all year, and it usually adds up to about £100. We use this for additional festive food and drink shopping. I save each month through the year for gifts, and we have a set spending amount, and amounts of gifts(!) to buy each other, plus the gifts for OH's family. I budget all year so that a little unexpected splurge in December is do-able, and OH has no real idea of what it costs, just knows we can afford it, and that's all that matters to him!

I did a food shop yesterday and asked DH to guess what the total was, he said about £30. The total was £125.

We always laugh when everyone opens their presents because the DC and DGC give DH a big hug and say 'thank you, Dad or Grandad' (and thank you to me too).
It's usually the first time he has clapped eyes on any of it.

He very occasionally gets a bit anxious about how much I we spend but, although I like to spend I know our limits - and I do like a bargain and discounts!

In answer to the OP, 'no' and it's probably best kept that way!!

There are very few compensations for having a DH who is not with it but having complete control over financial matters is one. He neither knows nor cares where money goes or how much I spend and it is quite good to never hear again "HOW MUCH?" !!! Wish it were otherwise though.

DH doesn't want to know about the Christmas budget. He just sits back and waits for it all to happen.

I swear he still believes in Santa

Not a bit sad... brilliantly efficient.

I've got a spreadsheet for presents, and have done for the last 10 years. It tells me what I've we've spent and what I we would have spent if I'd we'd paid full price (I pride myself on getting bargains!). DH shows no interest at all, but I did tell him what the total spend was when I bought the last present the other day and he went a bit green round the edges. I then pointed out that we have spent 3 times as much in Christmases past when we were both working and also when we didn't have this year's system of Secret Santa presents for adults in the immediate family (each just buying for one person, up to a £35 limit).

I could easily tot up what cards/postage/tree/food etc have cost, so could quickly come up with a total. I am that sad.

We give one person a £50 present and a £5 limit per person on the rest. Our DC decided this a few years ago saying the present giving had got out of hand. It was a huge relief. Thank heaven for Aldi and food!!

This year as a family we have set a budget £10 per person, only grandchild is exempt from the limit. So far we have actually all had quite a lot of fun trying to buy for each other!

I know pretty much to the penny because i have a spreadsheet and have had one for 10 years. Up until last year when I took early retirement i paid for it all, and the spreadsheet was to ensure that all the children had roughly the same number of gifts for roughly the same amount of money and helped remind me what I bought the previous year.

Now my DH pays for everything because I have 7 years to go to pensionable age and I never had a work based pension for a number of reasons.

We certainly spend less than before because our income is reduced but I love Christmas, I love treating the kids and grand-kids and as I don't smoke, don't really drink etc I feel its my one guilty pleasure so I'm not sorry for what I spend. Its worth every last penny.

I agree with you Coolgran about it feeling too commercial and I do think children generally have far too much stuff and that's why I give them one thing and the rest is money - their parents can buy them something if they really need it, or put it in their savings account, I don't ask. I certainly wouldn't dream of engaging in any sort of competition with the other GPs about who gives the most.
I agree with you too about the decorations. Ours will go up about 5 days before Dec 25, my only worry is that the Xmas trees might have sold out as the fashion now seems to be to install them at the beginning of December!

Thank you all - it's interesting to learn how others work it.

When I told DH what we had spent so far this year (pretty much done now) which was well beyond what he guessed, he said, oh right....
Last year I convinced him to agree that we'd limit our gift/s to each other to a £50 cap. (Partly because he is so difficult to buy for).

For DSs and DILs I reckon on £40/50 per head but sometimes manage to get away with less by using TK Maxx..... this year we bought 4 of them theatre tickets. They don't get money.

I'm the one who would look for the best price and keep tabs, no doubt from my 22 years with an ex who didn't work and myself as breadwinner and then single parent of a ds at university.

To be honest, per head ... it's the dgc who benefit most and I do think that where they are concerned it's getting out of hand. But then perhaps I'm comparing it to the days when I was about 14 and got a new school blazer as my Christmas present.

DH knows that I am good with money and never questions the cash flow, it's myself - from some sort of a moral sense - that feels it's all too materialistic..... not sure if that's just the word I'm looking for.... maybe commercialised...
I don't have any decorations up yet and usually hold out until around the 17th, which means I haven't got tired of them and they are still 'fresh to the eye' when it's time to take them down, which is usually 2 Jan.