Losing confidence in driving

Great post, feetle

Brilliant NanKate. !!!

Can hear the positivity in your post NanKate its great feeling when you start to conquer a fear , well done and good luck tomorrow.

Thanks Jayh I managed to get onto the M4 today in a positive manner and it was tipping down with rain. Trying out the M40 again tomorrow. After about a month of practise the instructor is taking me onto the M25

Congratulations NanKate on tackling your confidence issue so positively. I too am beginning to think twice about motorway driving but this thread has given me a boost because it is so supportive and informative. I will do what you did and get some refresher lessons if I need to.
Gransnet at its very best!
Enjoy your drive to Windsor.

I'm glad you enjoy driving so much Feetlebaum.

I have never heard a man say he has lost confidence in driving I wonder why.

I am taking DH on the M4 today to Windsor as part of my 'little and often' recommendation from my driving instructor. Still feeling nervous but will do it.

@Granjura -- "Personally I love driving, and living in mountains would just hate to have an automatic- I like to decide when and how softly/hard to break and when to change gear!"

Braking has nothing to do with the auto-transmission! Gearbox braking is frowned on these days, as being expensive in terms of wear - we no longer use wooden brake-blocks, you know...

"Brakes to slow - gears to go" - slow using the brake pedal, until you reach a suitable speed for exit from whatever hazard you are negotiating - only THEN select the appropriate gear and accelerate. That's the way it's taught nowadays. (It's only THEN that you really know which gear you'll want.)

My auto has four gears, and I will often lock down into D3 to negotiate a 30 mph stretch, although the transmission is quite capable of handling it in top.

Well done, NanKate! Just reading that put the wind up me. I really must get my head out of my backside and follow your good example!

Well done, NanKate Your confidence will build as you get more practice.

Thanks Tanith and Nana I am determined to drive for at least another 10 years and so must upskill myself.

Well done indeed [NanKate] a well earned pat on the back.

Well done NanKate a result indeed.

Well slowly but surely I am regaining my driving confidence on the motorway.

Had my first lesson with a mature driving instructor who gave me good advice on how to get onto the motorway and overtake on the motorway. Much to my surprise he said that I needed to drive faster.

He explained that most drivers who drive in lane one are going between 50 and 55 miles an hour. Lorries should not exceed about 55 miles an hour so when I am coming down the slip road I need to accelerate to about 55 and then fit in on the motorway by accelerating or de-accelerating accordingly. Instead of my usual dithering I followed this advice and got onto the motorway relatively easily.

He said if I wanted to stay in Lane one I should drive at about 55 mph to match the lorries. When the lorries go uphill they slow down so I have to decide whether to slow down with them or accelerate and overtake if safe to do so,

I am going to practise locally going on and off the motorway on my own for a week or so and then book a lesson to go onto the notorious M25.

I came home took a paracetamol, had a cup of strong coffee and a biscuit and recovered from the lesson.

It was well worthwhile it and I am determined to become a competent motorway driver.

Oh by the way before the lesson we chatted about my concerns and then at the end talked through how it had gone. I was surprised to hear that he thought I was a good driver and only needed tips on motorway driving - A RESULT !

Thanks shysal.

A Satnav is not a panacea - a few weeks I was driving home in the dark from a town that I am not familiar with. Mrs Satnav told me to move into the R hand lane and turn R. I could not do that as there was a large artic in that lane to my right followed by a string of cars, so I had to go straight on. The Satnav tried to retrieve me, but would say things like "Turn left into Faircombe Avenue" - since it was pitch dark and I was also trying to negotiate a one way system in the rush hour, I could not see the street names. So round and round I went for a very long time before I was able to escape.

Charleygirl, Halfords will help you to set up a sat nav and teach you the basics.
I have a Tom Tom, which is simple to operate, especially if you use post codes.

Thanks Tanith I may take a trip to the local Halfords and see if they have something suitable.

I do not call myself a driver but if I did I am definitely a town rather than a country or mountain one. I like street lights for one thing- not that I am able to drive in the dusk or dark any longer.

So important to drvie regularly to keep skills up. I find it sad to see that most older couples in cars have man at the wheel all the time. Must say I think it is really dangerous to keep driving licence but without regular practice in all conditions, rural, dual, towns, Mway, parking, etc.

Women are so often expected to drive in an emergency, or late at night when DH has been drinking a bit too much, etc... which is a recipe for disaster. Tell your DH you'd like to drive and not always default to him driving.

Personally I love driving, and living in mountains would just hate to have an automatic- I like to decide when and how softly/hard to break and when to change gear!

NanKate I will! I can't afford not to drive. I am in Cornwall and driving is really essential. Good luck you, let me know how you get on.

I rely on my sat nav which really helps and also tells me the speed restrictions in the area.

Christingle a neighbour recommended a good driving instructor to me, why don't you ask around as I did ? I am so relieved I have taken the first step to regaining my confidence.

I do understand your fear.

Charleygirl as far as I remember it was a TomTom my car has a built in satnav that has lane guidance on motorways which comes in handy if I'm on a motorway I'm not familiar with.

Thanks Tanith I will give that a try, I have a sat Nav on my kindle. I do make a plan in my head that I will manage a drive to the next town but always talk myself out of it, I literally feel sick at the thought. Last year I had to do it as a friends husband was in hospital, it was terrible and I was in a real state once I got home!
I really am ashamed at being so pathetic.

tanith do you know what make she bought?

Christingle do you have a satnav? a friend of mine who is a nervous driver always puts her satnav on even on a journey she knows well, she says it helps her enormously with things like roundabouts and tells her which lane to be in when approaching junctions, dual carriageways etc. Worth a try , I think some driving lessons will also help.