Gransnet forums

Ask a gran

How do you fill your time?

(206 Posts)
Sadiesnan Sun 10-Jan-16 18:25:41

I've had a very busy life, what with work and raising children. Now I'm retired I'm finding filling my time difficult. I've never been a craft/hobby sort of person and I'm not into groups where you go and chat. I like talking and discussing things but it has to be something meaningful. I'm not good at small talk. Has anyone got any ideas to help me find something to fill my time. I get down this time of year and I need something to lift my spirits.

Mariamha968 Thu 14-Jan-16 15:19:56

I practice Tai Chi...and read políticas thrillers...(the latter because I was -before retirement- a teacher in polítical science in the University and those novels written by excellent authors approach me to a real world..more than any factual information one acquires from journalists.

Conni7 Thu 14-Jan-16 15:18:45

There are 87 groups within our U3A, and I belong to 4: Computer Users, Gardening, Collecting and Ambling. If you can't find a group which interests you, you can start one yourself. Our annual fee is £10 for new members and £8 for existing members, which hardly breaks the bank. People are retired or semi-retired, and all very pleasant and welcoming. If you Google U3A, you should be able to find one near to you. Give it a try - it changed my life.

nanakate Thu 14-Jan-16 15:03:19

U3A is the University of the Third Age, a voluntary network of people who offer courses to small groups of fellow over-60s, sometimes in their own homes. u3a.org.uk/

nanakate Thu 14-Jan-16 15:01:25

Hi Sadiesnan,
I'm interested that your local U3A is all about coffee because where I live there are loads of course groups - everything from rambling to philosophy - and some of them are so serious that some people are put off! So clearly they are not the same all over.

I have found some really interesting courses on offer on futurelearn - it's a consortium of universities that presents free online taster courses. I have had a go at fiction-writing, marketing and learning how to read medieval music manuscripts. There are thousands of people all over the world learning on futurelearn, all ages and all walks of life. Definitely worth a look.

HannahLoisLuke Thu 14-Jan-16 14:52:12

What is U3A? I'm a new gransnetter and can't find this in the list of acronyms. Sorry for being thick.

Revis Thu 14-Jan-16 14:40:33

I was very much like you Sadiesnan when I retired from running a busy school office. I was aware I had a lot of computer skills that I could share with others. I went to the local U3A and just went to the main meetings once a month and listened to the speaker and came home. Then someone asked for help as he was running a beginners computer group. Four courses later I had made a number of friends who encouraged me to join other interest groups. I'm now out most days of the week and have 3 very special friends with whom I play cards and meet regularly. So start very slowly and things will get better over time

cikada Thu 14-Jan-16 14:19:34

I find Future Learn provides a great opportunity to pick up a new skill, study some subject that always interested me but I never found the time to realy get into. It's run by global universities, have a look on their site, you might find something to fill some of your time.

Having my dog who requires daily walks also occupies my time and provides the daily exercise.

witsyl Thu 14-Jan-16 14:17:21

If you are at home a lot have you tried doing crosswords and sudoku? I find cryptic crosswords are usually quite challenging and you soon get into the way of doing them? Also how about knitting or doing crochet? If you don't know how I am sure you could soon learn. Doing competitions online is also an option.

Retrolady Thu 14-Jan-16 14:12:43

That's my achievement for today - working out how to do a symbol on Gransnet!

Retrolady Thu 14-Jan-16 14:12:11

It's just occurred to me, having spent the morning doing 'something useful' i.e. making a cake for my grandson's birthday, that the problem with retirement can be worrying about doing things just because we want to, rather than because we have to as we're being paid.
I hadn't thought about it before - maybe some of us need to be kinder to ourselves and just have fun, or maybe (shock horror!) just do nothing - especially at this time of the year. hmm

baNANAGran3 Thu 14-Jan-16 14:10:26

Sadiesnan, I know exactly what you mean about small talk - please see below!

maryrose54, please don't feel guilty about retiring before your husband, you are your own person! I did just that, a couple of years before and thoroughly enjoyed them. I've read negative comments here about U3A - we moved a long way after both retired and the U3A has been invaluable in being the place to meet new and interesting people, not aways easy at our age. We have (jointly and separately) taken up new things, both sporty and educational and thoroughly enjoy life. Just saying.

lefthanded Thu 14-Jan-16 14:08:40

If you enjoy getting out and about, have you thought about geocaching (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Geocaching) ? It is a highly customizable hobby that can be as easy or as difficult as you like. Rural or urban. Solitary or in a group. Hi-tech or old-school.

bonji Thu 14-Jan-16 13:56:17

Hi everyone and especially Sadiesnan. Sounds like the suggestions have really helped and you are going to try lots of new ideas so do hope at least some of them work well for you. With my DH I was lucky enough to be able to retire at 55 and for various reasons we decided to move to a different county. Not knowing anyone and still being relatively young I was looking for something to do. I am not someone who likes to just sit and chat so I became a volunteer adviser at the Citizens Advice Bureau. This is a big commitment and takes quite a lot of work to become an adviser but I really enjoyed the satisfaction of helping people. After 10 years I decided to leave as I wanted more time just to be retired but would recommend giving it a try.

nannienet Thu 14-Jan-16 13:42:16

I retired early 2years ago to help look after my Grandchildren while their parents worked, now I have 4 Grandchildren and will be looking after them 4 days out of 5 a week come March! I will be busy and love joining in Toddler Groups and the children enjoy it too, it saves watching BBC Cbeebies all day! Then on days when I don't have Childcare to do I will enjoy a rest.

karenc Thu 14-Jan-16 13:31:08

I retired nearly 3 years ago and did not really enjoy the first year. My Partner is also retired and we have a dog and that certainly helps. I read, walk the dog, visit friends and relatives, have long weekend breaks. Meeting the Grandchildren from school is great too. I am not one for joining clubs etc but I suppose you would meet people of a similar age group which would be nice. Volunteering is a really good idea, Good luck Sadiesnan xx

jinglbellsfrocks Thu 14-Jan-16 13:28:21

Right. She's sorted now. Ok? hmm

Sadiesnan Thu 14-Jan-16 13:26:08

Right, thanks again everyone for your brilliant suggestions. I've joined the local leisure centre and done my first aqua-fit class. I'm hobbling but I enjoyed it.

I've contacted my local Probus Club and spoken to a very nice lady who invited me to their next talk. www.probus.org/ProbusUK-Ladies.pdf

I've contacted the Townswomen's Guild and I have details of their next meeting. www.probus.org/ProbusUK-Ladies.pdf

I've also decided on a little hobby I'm going to do in my spare time at home. I'm going to take photos of every day that is special to me throughout the year, for whatever reason and do a little write up of why that day was special.

I love the wild birds, so I've been out this morning looking at bird tables. I'm going to get one and do all I can to encourage the wild birds into my garden.

I'm feeling very positive about all this. sunshinesunshinesunshine

LesleyC Thu 14-Jan-16 13:21:50

I sometimes think we feel we "ought" to get out and do things in our retirement. I am not a joiner of anything and am quite happy in my home, meeting friends for lunch every now and again. I did do some volunteering but became disillusioned with the charity sector and didn't really want the commitment at a certain time every week. I just see my family and grandchildren once a week as it is a 30 mile drive away, so there isn't the daily involvement with them. I am quite happy doing my own thing on the internet or reading and I have a Pilates class once a week. (The only thing I have joined!) It did take me a while after retirement to realise that I can do exactly what I want and if I don't do anything some days, that's fine too!

esjaybee Thu 14-Jan-16 13:20:28

Sadiesnan, do you take photos? I was bought a new camera for Xmas so am now beginning to take photos on this rather than on my phone. Although it seemed a little strange at first going out with the intention of taking photos rather than just taking snapshots to record what we are doing it's amazing what you see when out and about looking through a camera viewfinder. The photos that are posted on local Facebook groups provide excellent inspiration of places and things to photograph and it's amazing how much I have learnt about my local area since joining these Facebook group, for example the animals sculpures in our local park.

mischief Thu 14-Jan-16 13:16:50

Do you have a computer? Tracing my family history has been really exciting and rewarding for me.

weepam Thu 14-Jan-16 13:15:39

since my wife and I retired a few years ago we formed a 50's style skiffle band with fellow pensioners near brum and we play to raise money for our favourite charities.we also recorded a c.d last august and raised over £500 for the british lung foundation.we can be seen on youtube under our name 'the 6-5 specials skiffle band' and we,ve also been filmed recently for a coming bbc 4 series 'the people's history of pop' in april.

Jumbly01 Thu 14-Jan-16 13:09:50

There's a totally free on line learning environment called Future Learn with a vast portfolio of programmes which range from 3-8 weeks in duration. All are university attached. I have completed several now and found out about all sorts of things I have no previous knowledge of. There's university input at the commencement of each section with individuals contributing much like this forum. Lots of useful links are given for further research, there was so much info available on fracking that there was a real danger of not completing the course. I' try and enter each one with a completely open mind. Some learners are very knowledgeable and a real asset. One or two appear to be quite opinionated and I usually avoid dialogue there. Id say it's worth a look and maybe trying something outside of your comfort zone. U3A isn't for me either

ap123 Thu 14-Jan-16 12:59:18

Sadiesnan: I am a bit like you and I have pottered about a little aimlessly for about a year and the something one of my kids said got me writing. It's much harder than people think but it is a lot of fun. If you have spent a career in teaching you must have a ton of stories to tell and ideas about what works and what doesn't. Why not join a creative writing class and start on your memoirs? Between homework, research and writing time I hardly have time for grasnet smile

maryrose54 Thu 14-Jan-16 12:44:37

Am going to try gain. Found all comments interesting and can identify with those of you who say that you are not chatty, coffee morning type of people. I can't officially retire for another 3 years and OH another 7 years. Have worked as TA in infant school for over 20 years, but just recently it has become more pressurised. More and more expected of us. Love the children but feeling more stressed. A colleague of my age decided to give up work early for this reason and I am considering doing the same. The problems for me are guilt( OH still working full time) loss of salary and what my life would look like. We could cut back on outgoings of course. I would see more of daughter and small grandson who are local, with another on the way. Would need to keep busy because I find it difficult doing nothing constructive/useful. Don't expect anyone to have an answer but would welcome your thoughts.

NotSpaghetti Thu 14-Jan-16 12:40:54

University!
It worked for me!