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My very frail MiL has been evicted from her residentional home

(12 Posts)
morethan2 Sun 22-Jan-17 13:25:43

My MiL dementia is getting worse and for some months the residentional home has been saying they can't cope and she'll have to be moved. Her health has been failing for a while and for the third time in a month she's been admitted to hospital. On Friday the residentional home rang and asked us to come and collect her things as they wouldn't be allowing her back once she was discharged from hospital. We live 200 miles away,her daughters partner is seriously ill and anyway her home wouldn't be suitable for someone so frail to live there and that's the same for her other two sons. So poor mum is homeless and bed-blocking. Can they do this with no notice to a frail 86 year old. Surely not?

Fairydoll2030 Sun 22-Jan-17 13:32:50

Oh dear, what an awful thing to happen. I don't profess to know anything about this type of situation, but it seems unlikely that the home can refuse to take her back as this would effectively make her homeless. Contact Social Services first thing tomorrow and also her GP.

Jane10 Sun 22-Jan-17 13:39:33

Social services will have to deal with this. The residential home may well just plain not be registered or staffed for care of people with dementia. Its not their fault. They have said they can't cope with her. Until the family of Social Services find somewhere more appropriate for her she'll have to stay in hospital. This is the sort of thing that all the concerns about bed blocking and social care are all about.

stayanotherday Sun 22-Jan-17 13:52:39

I agree. Please contact her GP and social services for an assessment. At least the hospital can look after her for now, it's not ideal but at least your MIL is getting appropriate care in the meantime.

Cold Sun 22-Jan-17 14:13:12

I feel so sorry for you. It sounds as though she needs a proper nursing home and not a basic residential home

Many residential homes do not offer full-time nursing care as they are staffed by carers and not nurses and they are not equipped to deal with medical/nursing needs although the district nurse will come in.

We were almost faced with this issue with my mother when she became very ill and frail and needed a nurse available and some days 1:1 care. We were worried that they would ask her to leave although in the end it didn't happen as she died unexpectedly.

You need to contact social services and request their help

Luckygirl Sun 22-Jan-17 14:48:10

The home is not breaking any law by refusing to have her back - in fact they may have been in breach of their registration for keeping her as long as they have done.

The hospital cannot discharge her until a suitable care plan has been organised. Contact SSD or the hospital attached SW and they will take it from there. Don't panic!!

morethan2 Sun 22-Jan-17 15:11:15

Thanks for the information especially yours Luckygirl as upsetting as it is it's best to know the facts. At least now we won't get into a argument with the home. I will pass on the information to the family who live locally.

MissAdventure Sun 22-Jan-17 15:32:14

The hospital should have a social worker assigned to your mum in law, and also a discharge nurse. I picked up a leaflet from the hospital when my mum was in there just before Christmas. Your relatives could phone and ask to speak to one or the other. Good luck: hope she is happy and cared for when she does get settled.

Jalima Sun 22-Jan-17 15:36:33

The residential home should have called the family in for a meeting and told them that she will have to be moved. This happened to an elderly aunt in law and her family had to make alternative arrangements for her rapidly - she could not be discharged from hospital until somewhere else was found. She had dementia.

The thing is that a residential home is not a nursing home. Nurses have to be further qualified in dementia care before the home can take dementia patients, both for the sake of the staff but also the elderly person.

Jalima Sun 22-Jan-17 15:37:23

and also not but also
Essential for both.

Jalima Sun 22-Jan-17 15:41:34

I don't know why they took her back if they cannot take dementia patients.

If she had remained in hospital and they refused to have her back, even though that may seem unkind it would speed things up and help to find somewhere where her care will be more suitable.

I hope you can find somewhere soon, perhaps nearer to family.

BlueBelle Sun 22-Jan-17 16:07:14

The same happened to mum she had a fall was taken to hospital with a suspected hip fracture was not broken just bruised but she had to stay for over five weeks as the home refused to have her back and it took me and the social worker that length of time to find a residential to accommodate her The one she ended up in was actually not as well equipped as the first one but they accepted her I was not told by the home but only by the social worker The home she ended up in did take dementia patients but was manned by totally untrained workers kind but of no specific dementia training standards this was 10 years ago so things may have tightened up since then