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Any ideas welcome

(37 Posts)
Glenfinnan Tue 12-Sept-17 08:47:38

My Aunt who has similar symptoms likes colouring books. I get large one, not intricate and felt tip pens for her. Sometimes just a change of scene can be distressing and confusing but a warm welcome will relax her I'm sure. I also bought my Aunt a 'fidget' knitted comforter it has various things attached such as a small bell and other objects. Perhaps keep it at your home for future visits. You sound a good person!

kittylester Tue 12-Sept-17 08:28:15

Folding towels isn't such a bad one. Sometimes keeping the hands active is good. I heard of someone who picked fillings out of their teeth until they were given something more purposeful to do.

Another person was given endless amounts of small change to count.

An important thing to remember is that your friend might forget what she did but the happy feelings will last and will help her husband after they get home.

Imperfect27 Tue 12-Sept-17 08:15:18

Bluebelle, confession: I only skim read the beginning of that list before posting - it may not be as useful as first glance suggested! There are some nice ideas - also some odd ones - such as folding towels ... ! And obviously it is American - I suppose you could play 'Name that Prime Minister!' instead of 'president'!

With all the kind thought and preparation time you are giving to it, I feel in my bones that you and your friend will have a good evening.

BlueBelle Tue 12-Sept-17 08:05:17

The walk would be good but it ll be evening and it's pretty cold and windy here at the moment so no flowers or birds to see or listen to
I like the idea of 60 s music I hadn't thought of that and I have some old 60 s CDs
She wouldn't manage the numbers on dominos but I do think I should have a Jenga tucked away from the grandkids I ve got rid of most of the 'toys' now they are teens
Thanks for the link imperfect I ll go through that too
I have got an adult colouring book that I was doing myself I wonder if that would be a possibility I don't want to think I m babying her She's at an inbetween stage
If I could explain I would describe her as a 'proper' sort of lady not someone who would ever let her hair down she's a lady with never a hair out of place and although her conversational and abilities are limited I think she would still realise if I was to suggest too childish things
I do appreciate your ideas and help x

annsixty Tue 12-Sept-17 08:04:53

My H who is at a similar time scale ( over 5 years) would be happy to watch old comedies i.e. sky Gold for hours.
Conversation is a no no. We are always told to remember old days and show photographs, my H isn't interested at all and his memory isn't jogged.
I think you shouldn't try too hard, while you may be bored, she won't, and will have forgotten 10 minutes after her H has picked her up.
Just switch the box on, make a cup of tea and provide cake/ biscuits and she will probably be content.
Of course the obvious thing is to ask her H what she does in the evening when they are at home together.

silverlining48 Tue 12-Sept-17 08:01:32

Lots of helpful suggestions, but the main thing us that you are still there for your friend and haven't dropped her, as this often can happen. Her husband is probably on his knees and needs some time to himself, so well done. Whatever you do, music or manicure, walking or watching an old film, your friend will know on some level that she is loved and cared for.
Alzheimers is a frightening place to find oneself.

Nana3 Tue 12-Sept-17 07:50:59

A game of dominoes always goes down well at my Mum's care home.
They have a bit of pampering too, manicure, hand cream, foot massage that sort of thing.
A cd of songs from the musicals is a firm favourite.
Hope you have a good evening.

notnecessarilywiser Tue 12-Sept-17 06:59:28

Pop music from your schooldays might be fun to sing along with? You may both even feel like dancing!

Imperfect27 Tue 12-Sept-17 06:43:19

Bluebelle I was at a loss as to know what to suggest as this is beyond my experience. However, I found this list of suggested activities online and lots of them look fairly simple and inexpensive to attempt:

www.alz.org/living_with_alzheimers_101_activities.asp

Lovely that you are able to host your friend and that her DH can have a few hours break, knowing she is in a trusted and safe place. I hope all goes well.

kittylester Tue 12-Sept-17 06:40:07

Well done you for helping her husband. and allowing him the opportunity to have something of his own to do.

Does she enjoy watching television or films Eg musicals! Is there a particular type of music she enjoys?

JackyB Tue 12-Sept-17 06:38:20

You could go for a walk and point out flowers and listen to the birds (they are very loud at the moment as they gather to fly away for the winter.

Many ideas that would apply to young children could work here, such as preparing food together or doing something with your hands. Something to stimulate the senses.

Singing?

BlueBelle Tue 12-Sept-17 05:12:47

Tonight my school friend, who I lost touch with when we left school but picked up about ten years ago (I see her once a month on a school friends lunch ) is being dropped off whilst her husband goes to a meeting ... she is five years into Alzheimer's and got to the point where she can't be left alone He has done this once before and it was a long three and a half hours I am really happy to have her round and glad I can be trusted and help but have you any ideas what we can do She doesn't have much conversation apart from yeses and no s I got lots of photo albums out last time and school stuff to jog her memory but her interested was very limited we had something to eat and drink but there was still a lot of time left I want her to have a nice time
I just wondered if some of you had any thoughts other than photos ( I know nothing about her life between 16 and 60 so no memories other than school )
Thanks for reading