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What lifted you

(14 Posts)
Serkeen Thu 02-Nov-17 15:50:44

Am a little bruised and feel trooden down, feel I am in mud and am trying to climb out of it, Just need that turn around moment to get me back on that horse.

What has helped you back up ..

Coolgran65 Thu 02-Nov-17 16:19:57

A call from an offspring on the other side of the world.
(but that makes me sometimes feel needy)

Deciding that I matter and don't have to be perfect. And we don't have to be the Waltons.
Also realising that if a family member is in the hump about something it doesn't mean that it's personally at me. (this can be hard to do)

I keep reading about living in the moment, yesterday is past and we don't know about tomorrow !! That can be hard also.

It is horrible to feel like this and I hope your spirits lift a little.

Day6 Thu 02-Nov-17 16:42:21

Serkeen, is that just a general down mood, or has something happened which has left you feeling this way?

I suspect most of us have times when we feel this way but if it lasts and you can't lift your mood or rid yourself of that feeling, do go and see if your GP can suggest something.

I have lots of days lately where I don't feel so lively or upbeat or positive, and that's quite unusual for me. I try to be cheery and positive - not in a sickly Pollyanna way but I try to make the best of things. I don't seem able to shake myself out of a getting old and slowing down mood of late and inaction seems to beget inaction. It isn't nice, especially in the evenings when I feel I have achieved very little.

If positive self talk is your thing then keep plugging away at that or try to do some small task and keep busy. I always find music can lift me. I know too that getting out in the fresh air and having a walk is a great tonic but there are days when I cannot even force myself to do that. I tell myself to do little and remain content is a luxury I can afford now I am retired.

I am not being much of a help I know, sorry, but sometimes give in to the low mood and go with it for a day or two, do very little, indulge the feelings then plan a day where you are nice to yourself. Style your hair, use make up, wear perfume (if that's something you do) and wear those good clothes and take yourself out for a coffee. I have to fake it until I make it more and more these days! smile Hope you're back in the saddle soon!

loopyloo Thu 02-Nov-17 16:52:41

I don't think the hour going back has helped. I just want to sit and eat something, then go to sleep.
Day6, I so agree. Must make an effort to smarten myself up and go out somewhere.
Serkeen, perhaps a light machine might help.
Something that cheers me up is having something to look forward to.

cornergran Thu 02-Nov-17 17:01:32

That’s a horrid feeling, serkeen. When it hits me, as it has recently, I know that being outside, walking within my limits, gardening (pruning in particular), noticing natural things like a sunset, the waves on the beach, the birds in the garden lifts me for just a little while. I can read and ‘forget’, sometimes music helps. Watching tv I find I can still think, not such a good thing for me. The right friends help, pick which ones you see or chat to carefully though. Now and again loud music and a good scream helps.

The main thing is don’t push yourself too much. Tiny steps, be as kind to yourself as you would to another person

I hope the world seems brighter very soon, for us both and anyone else trying to climb out of a stuck place.

Serkeen Thu 02-Nov-17 17:13:17

Thank you for your reply's x

A few things have happened recently that have knocked me Having to travel to a new place of work that was very far and I got lost regularly..Not getting any kind of back up or support from my husband, just generally feel stuff piling on and on Been told by the Doctor that I need a second blood test as thae last was high and showing possible diabetes

And then I feel terrible because if I do have diabetes it is my own fault because my friend told me many times that if I did not separate from my husband that I would become ill

Just all piling up really

Thirdinline Thu 02-Nov-17 17:24:25

Gosh Serkeen, if you really feel that your husband is the part of the problem, is there any way you can get some space between you, at least until you have worked out your new commute? Could you buy/borrow a satnav? As you can see, my way of dealing with negative feelings is to work out what's causing them and try to remedy that! Have you tried telling your husband that you need him to be more supportive?

I agree with cornergran, getting out into nature and going for a walk usually helps lift my mood. Listening to music I like, meeting up with a friend for coffee and a chat, or phoning if it's not possible to meet.

Thirdinline Thu 02-Nov-17 17:27:37

Sorry to hear about the second blood test. As a Christian, I "cast my cares on the cross", which I take to mean pray about them and let God deal with them, or let me know how to.

loopyloo Thu 02-Nov-17 17:38:26

Dear Serkeen,
Ah yes being told about the possible diabetes is enough to feel down. I felt personally responsible as I had let the weight creep on. Eating for comfort.
I find it helps to write down the various different problems and also possible solutions.
Frankly, I have learnt not to look for support from DH and to paddle my own canoe.

If your Hbaic was raised you can get it down. There is a very good thread on GN about low carbs.
Also you can't just leave your husband easily so don't feel guilty about that. She is not living your life.

Perhaps take one problem at a time.
Wishing you all the best.

Nelliemoser Thu 02-Nov-17 17:48:01

Getting out into the garden but the winter is upon us now.

loopyloo Thu 02-Nov-17 19:25:51

What about staying at a travelodge one night so you have a break from your journey and also your husband. Have a little treat?

lemongrove Thu 02-Nov-17 19:32:22

Serkeen ?
A bit of time to yourself, after work, don’t try and do too much.Some good advice on here.

Serkeen Fri 03-Nov-17 10:18:01

I actually do love the winter love the snow and the autumn leaves

Am feeling better now don't mind saying that I clled Samaritans because I was feeling over whelmed withno one to talk to

It really helped me having someone happy listen and make small suggestions about my situations that really helped

Samaritans number is 116123

Thank you for your interest in my situation and your advice x x

Thirdinline Wed 08-Nov-17 17:31:13

Glad you turned it around Serkeen. Have you had that 2nd blood test yet? Xx