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Jumping the gun.

(13 Posts)
Nanawind Mon 05-Mar-18 21:55:39

My son went for an interview, at the moment he works 6.30am to 2.30pm so he is available to pick his DD up from school at 3.15pm. DiL works 9 to 5.
This new job is 9-5 also. He hasn't been told he's got the job but me and DH think that if he does we will be expected to pick said child up from school, we already have her during school holidays. She's only 10 so it could be a couple of years before she can go home on her own. She does have an older brother he's 13.
We have tried to say we don't want to be committed all the time but have not been firm. We are going to their house tomorrow as we are going on holiday and we will tell them both properly then. I hope it doesn't cause any problems between us.
He's not got the job yet but I'm already upset thinking about it.
What would you do if I'm asked.

Lynnebo Mon 05-Mar-18 22:01:07

Isn’t there an after school club at your GDs school? My DGS stays for the club after 3:30pm and is collected by his parents at 5.30pm. There is a charge but they get a snack and play games or make things. It’s the way of the world these days. I’m sure the parents will manage x

tanith Mon 05-Mar-18 22:04:09

Don't agree to do it , they will manage if you are firm.

sodapop Mon 05-Mar-18 22:07:40

Think you have to be firm and say you will help if there is a crisis but day to say they need to make their own arrangements. It seems that nowadays it's an expectation grandparents will take on a caring role. You have done your child care and now you can have time for yourselves.

MissAdventure Mon 05-Mar-18 22:07:40

Once you've said it, the worst is over with, (hopefully!)
Then its just a matter of standing firm, and not being drawn into comprising.
The school will have an after school club which almost all working parents use.
Its all a bit daft, being nervous of your own children, though I understand how it happens.

Nanawind Tue 06-Mar-18 19:14:05

We went to sons house and we had a good chat about childcare for DGD, it went so well. We have agreed to commit to holiday care as usual and will also have her if parents have meetings which could make them late. The meetings for DIL are once a month. So my worry was for nothing.
Thanks for your replies x

Jalima1108 Tue 06-Mar-18 19:21:40

and there will probably be an after-school club for those days where it is difficult; it could mean a long day for 4-5 year olds but a 10 year old will probably enjoy it.

Oopsadaisy12 Tue 06-Mar-18 19:24:09

I wouldn’t second guess him, they might have organised child care already.

Auntieflo Wed 07-Mar-18 14:21:32

Well done Nanwind, it's often the putting it off is worse than actually having the courage to say something outright.

OldMeg Wed 07-Mar-18 15:06:32

Is this new job prospect something you would like him to get? If so then he could well have extra cash to pay for after-school Care and have already have thoight this out.

Most primaries offer, or have access to wrap-around child care anyway.

gillybob Wed 07-Mar-18 15:12:55

Don't always assume there is after school care. My DGC's school doesn't have any.

I am fortunate (and happy) to be able to pick up and drop off a few days a week (to fit in with my DDiL's shift pattern) but I know that's not always possible for many grandparents. There is a (childminder) lady who picks up and drops off various children at my DGC's school everyday and she does school holiday care too, I know a few of the young parents use her.

Jalima1108 Wed 07-Mar-18 15:20:59

Don't always assume there is after school care
No, of course, there may not be and it may only be on certain days.

OldMeg Wed 07-Mar-18 16:07:49

Yes, it’s a pity that plans for all primaries to offer wrap-around care were shelved by Nicky Morgan when she was Conservative Secretary of State for Education.