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Are you a competitive grandparent?

(21 Posts)
LaraGransnet (GNHQ) Thu 05-Jul-18 12:11:45

We've been asked to speak on radio again today and the topic this time is school sports days. Having just had my daughter's yesterday I can definitely admit to a bit of competitiveness. But what do you class as getting carried away? Are you a very competitive grandparent? Is this actually a good thing? What's the most ridiculous behaviour you've seen at a sports day? Have you ever let your competitive nature get the better of you when it comes to your children or grandchildren?

kittylester Thu 05-Jul-18 12:18:15

I don't need to be competitive because, even if mine don't win, they are clearly the brightest, best looking and most talented children there!


gillybob Thu 05-Jul-18 12:39:38

My 3 eldest grandchildren (12,10 and 8) are all super sporty and excel at just about every sport they try . I rarely ever brag about their sporting achievments , but they do tend to win almost everything they enter. The most ridiculous thing I have ever seen ( or rather heard) at sports day was a parent asking my middle granddaughters’ teacher to not let her take part to give someone else a chance ! The teacher thankfully refused and said “one day when G is an Olympic sportswoman , you might laugh at your request” .

silverlining48 Thu 05-Jul-18 12:43:44

Parental competitiveness strong among parents. Sports day Tuesday, some parents brought high end running shoes to put on in order to have the best chance to win, which they did much to others amusement.

Grandparents don’t get a race, thank goodness, but my dgc both came second. I wasn’t there this time, but look forward to next year. I am not competitive so it doesn’t matter to me who wins, though was pleased mine did so well.

tanith Thu 05-Jul-18 13:01:05

My GD school don't have a competitive sports day they all take part in games instead. Never been competitive with any of mine.

Luckygirl Thu 05-Jul-18 13:04:04

It's the fathers' race you want to worry about when it comes to competitiveness!

Grandma70s Thu 05-Jul-18 13:09:57

I’ve never been to my grandchildren’s sports days, but I’m not at all competitive about sport, because I don’t think it matters one way or the other. It’s a different matter when it comes to anything academic or musical.

I was astonished, not to say shocked, when I saw the competitive behaviour of parents at my sons’ sport days in the 1970s. At my own ‘nice’ girls’ school polite applause was the most outrageous behaviour in evidence.

gillybob Thu 05-Jul-18 14:17:14

Shall we all tell gifted children, in whatever discipline, be it netball, running, maths, spelling, football etc. that perhaps they should lose just to save the feelings of those at the lower end ?

I’m loving the World Cup and wonder if perhaps we should throw the Sweden match just in case it hurts the feelings of the Swedes or the little boys who never quite made it ?

Eglantine21 Thu 05-Jul-18 14:28:01

Does it have to be compulsory for everyone to take part, whether they’re any good or not?

Can’t think of any other discipline (reading, art, music) where we insist that even the most untalented should publicly humiliate themselves.

Peep Thu 05-Jul-18 14:42:09

Very good point Eglantine21 .

PamelaJ1 Thu 05-Jul-18 16:07:13

It’s a shame that sports day is such a public thing. You are actually up there for all to see and some children feel humiliated. They certainly don’t need parents to take it so seriously.
Luckily neither of my children were bothered by not being athletically gifted. They had other strengths.
So no we have never been over the top. Just enjoying sport is more important. DD1 couldn’t run for her life but is a great sailor now. DD2 has continued not to have the slightest interest in sports.

petra Thu 05-Jul-18 19:37:10

We are competitive family in all things, from playing cards to cooking ( that would be my OH cooking, I don't)
My granddaughter is very competitive as I was in all sports.
She loves me on the sidelines screaming her on. She stands on that start line, looks at me and grins, and I know what's going through her head: "I'm going to win this"
My grandson is completely different. I think he's more concerned when standing on the start line that his hair looks ok and what girls are looking at him grin

grannyactivist Thu 05-Jul-18 19:44:28

One of my sons is competitive in that he's a team player and would hate to be the person to let the team down, but no, I encourage my children to do their best and enjoy a win, but don't take losing to heart.

Greyduster Thu 05-Jul-18 19:51:54

I have never been to GS’s sports day, though we support him at his football games and his cross country events, both of which he is good at, and his cricket which he is singularly rubbish at, but he tries very hard. I rather agree with eglantine. The way junior tournaments are organised these days, all players must bat, field and bowl. He cannot bowl for toffee, often to the detriment of his team, which I know is humiliating for him, but he does what he can with resignation, and we praise him for his resilience. The worst action I ever saw perpetrated by a parent was at a cross country meeting when a mother actually claimed a place at the front of the field for her daughter who was late turning up and actually moved other children out of the way to do it! A marshall took her to task and she argued with him. Only the fact that he threatened to disqualify the child shut her up! If I had been the child I would have wanted the ground to open up and swallow me!

BlueBelle Thu 05-Jul-18 19:52:09

I am the opposite to competitive whatever that word is Have no interest in ‘winning’ I d be the one at the back waiting for the ‘littlest’ to catch up I have two children who are extremely athletic and extremely competitive my eldest is like me and doesn’t have a competitive bone in her body although she started running at 50 but has never looked to be a winner but an enjoyer

blossom14 Thu 05-Jul-18 20:06:09

My GGCH are both competitive in gymnastics. Their parents are both competitive and sporty ranging from Iron Man, Cycling, Marathons and ski-ing.
They appear to be a very united family and both children seem to thrive in this atmosphere.
I am waiting to see what happens when the children hit their teens- if I live that long.

Deedaa Thu 05-Jul-18 20:36:07

I worried when DD told me she was going to win all the races at her first school sports day. I thought she would be so disappointed when she came last in everything like I used to. Of course she won all the races and continued to do so every year until they had trouble finding anyone who would race against her!

winterwhite Thu 05-Jul-18 20:41:21

Competition brings out the worst in people as well as the best. So I suppose the egg and spoon race is good preparation for life smile

M0nica Fri 06-Jul-18 19:44:45

I am not a competitive grandmother, until DGC win, which they do occasionally, in which case I am high fiving with the best of them.

agnurse Sun 08-Jul-18 22:51:24

I live in Canada so hockey is a big thing here. It can get very competitive. My uncle once told the following riddle:

What's the difference between a hockey mum and a pit bull?


Sad to say it's sometimes true!

Nannarose Mon 09-Jul-18 09:34:47

I brought up mine to be cooperative. Now that means they are well liked as team members, at work, in sporting activities, as friends and so on. So that means they win all round ;)