In August last year on my husband's birthday we invited our son and daughter-in-law, my mother and sister to our home for a Champagne High Tea. Our daughter-in-law was in the kitchen helping with the washing-up. My mother remarked that DIL was doing what comes naturally, to which our DIL took umbrage as it must have hit a raw nerve. Consequently, DIL asked my mother to apologise which she would not do, as she felt that there was nothing to apologise for, and I thought that was the end of it - particularly as DIL had completely forgotten about it.
The next family get-together was for a birthday party at my sister's house for her grand-daughter's birthday party in May of this year, which included our son and DIL plus mother and sister. We all thought that we had had a lovely afternoon.
We had totally forgotten about the incident from a year before until last Saturday when we went to my sister's house for her other granddaughter's birthday party. However, this time our son and DIL could not be there. My sister seemed very distant and edgy towards me during the afternoon - so I felt that maybe she was just busy.
However, as we were leaving my sister informed me that at the previous party in May my DIL totally ignored my mother (who is 94) and what's more prevented the 4-year old granddaughter going anywhere near my mother. I feel that what my sister said is a defamation of DIL's character, as she was not there to defend herself. My sister should have dealt with this at the party in May when they were all there and not put it on my shoulders on Saturday.
This was a total shock to me as we all had a lovely time together in May and I didn't see anything untoward. My DIL is a kind generous person and would be mortified to know that they were speaking about her behind her back about something that would appear to have never happened. When we looked at photos from that day in May we saw that the very opposite had occurred - for example my mother happily cuddling the great-granddaughter whom was said to be kept apart from.
I feel that my sister is abusing my mother and her granddaughter for her own ends. Can anybody give me some guidance as to where to go from here, as I would like to keep my DIL and son out of this, as they were innocent parties in all of this.
Thank you very much for any help you can give me.
CaroleAnne Mon 06-Aug-18 16:40:30
ContraryMary88 Mon 06-Aug-18 16:48:35
lemongrove Mon 06-Aug-18 16:49:09
Melanieeastanglia Mon 06-Aug-18 16:51:10
FlexibleFriend Mon 06-Aug-18 16:58:06
Bluegal Mon 06-Aug-18 17:37:16
Newmom101 Mon 06-Aug-18 18:07:07
Cold Mon 06-Aug-18 18:53:04
OldMeg Mon 06-Aug-18 19:54:44
Nannarose Mon 06-Aug-18 21:26:43
CaroleAnne Tue 07-Aug-18 15:11:34