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Best place to live

(24 Posts)
Ellen80 Thu 11-Apr-19 10:17:26

I've a lovely house, near lovely Bury St Edmunds, every convenience ( doctor,dentist,supermarket and hospital but the Close where I LIVE is too quiet. Everyone goes to work! I do get out to clubs( my H pleased to have time on his own as he's an academic) but after two years here I've only one friend and feel there could be a better place to live which still offers more than I have here. I know it sounds pathetic but at 80 I want to make the most of the rest of my life. Volunteering is not on at the moment, but is a possibility after my knee replacement surgery. Are you very pleased with where you live I would love to hear from you. Our family live in Holland (possibility but we would rather stay UK) My H does not want retirement home yet!!.

Nonnie Thu 11-Apr-19 10:48:26

When we are older we have to make the first move as we found out. We invited the neighbours for an 'At Home' which was wonderful and we found out just how lovely they all are.

I think you have to find something for yourself and not expect people to come to you. Usually people suggest U3A but of course there are many other things like WI and knit and natter groups. Go to your local library to see what is on near you. Maybe even find something on Google.

Why would an academic prefer to be on his own?

craftyone Thu 11-Apr-19 10:54:13

There is a fine line between making `friends` and having people pop in. I personally do not want people to pop in, I will join things, will take be friendly to my new neighbours, will be that person that people can turn to but will not be taken forgranted with an ever open door.

Ellen it sounds as though you have that yearning feeling inside of you, the one we all had when we were younger, striving for something unknown and ethereal. You need to have something concrete to be working on, with aims and rewards for succeeding and guess what, I think open university would be ideal

Riverwalk Thu 11-Apr-19 11:19:30

To answer your question, yes I'm very pleased with where I live - inner London, next to the river and near all facilities and activities.

You say you live near Bury St Edmunds - sounds like you'd prefer to live in the centre in one of those lovely town houses! But wherever you live it won't guarantee you more friends.

You don't sound pathetic to want to make the most of your life and for wanting to live somewhere livelier, if I've got your drift. I like peace and quiet as much as the next person but would hate to live in suburbia.

Riverwalk Thu 11-Apr-19 11:25:04

.......yearning feeling inside of you, the one we all had when we were younger, striving for something unknown and ethereal

Spot on Crafty - I suspect most of us have those feelings at times.

FountainPen Thu 11-Apr-19 11:41:07

The more vibrant a place the more likely it is that people will be younger and therefore out working most of the day. There’s a lot to be said for living somewhere quiet.

Maybe lack of mobility is getting you down right now but once your knee is fixed you can start looking for new things to do to get you motivated again.

Bury St Edmunds is a lovely town with plenty going on culturally. Lots on at the Theatre Royal and The Apex and I’m sure many more things to do and get involved in than you imagine. You have the festival coming up next month too.

Scribbles Thu 11-Apr-19 11:47:16

I love where I live! Like the OP's, it's a quiet road and many of the residents are out all day. Sometimes, it seems like I'm taker-in of parcels for the street grin.

I'm one of those bods who enjoys being at home, alone or with my OH and, since we came here, I've developed an interest in gardening (never thought that would happen!). The gardener does the hard work and the boring bits while I enjoy planning and planting and encouraging my little plants to grow.

I tried joining National Women's Register and met some friendly people, although the general set up wasn't really for me. OH and I both have an interest in vintage vehicles and do some volunteering in various capacities at the local transport museum; we've recently joined U3A for the first time so we can go on outings and visits with the Transport & Industry group.

OH enjoys male bonding on a regular basis with friends he's made in our local hostelry and I've met some interesting new friends via GN meets.

At home, I knit a bit when the mood takes me and I write, mostly for fun but sometimes for profit. I'm learning a new language and I'm planning some house refurbishment and sleep late when I want to. I left full time work 11 years ago and did wonder briefly how I would fill my days but they seem to have filled themselves. Just try your hand at anything which interests you or follow up on an earlier interest you didn't used to have time for. Summer's coming and that should help to get your mojo back in gear. flowers

lovebeigecardigans1955 Thu 11-Apr-19 11:58:22

It's getting the balance right isn't it? In the centre of a large town you'd have lots of facilities, transport links but also the noise, crowds, etc to go with it.
In the middle of nowhere it's quiet, no facilities and little in the way of public transport.
Suburbia is a middle way- I have a good bus service, GP and shops within walking distance. A short bus ride away there's a hospital and shopping centres. It lacks beauty though - you can't have everything.

KatyK Thu 11-Apr-19 12:29:41

I love where I live. It's a suburb of a city. Good bus/train services, easy access to shops, cinemas, theatres, restaurants etc.

EllanVannin Thu 11-Apr-19 13:14:12

I love where I live too, very near the sea, promenade and park. Bus routes convenient as are shops,chemist and surgeries. A library not far away with another park adjoined by a large cemetery complete with a little chapel.
Where I am it's quiet in a vale tucked away from main roads but with an " established " neighbourhood, trouble-free I might add, so I feel lucky to live here 5mins from the sea.

humptydumpty Thu 11-Apr-19 13:22:10

EV that sounds really good! can I ask where it is?

EllanVannin Thu 11-Apr-19 13:24:50

It's New Brighton humptydumpty.

humptydumpty Thu 11-Apr-19 13:40:03

Thanks Ellen - I shall go and visit! Would have liked to retire to (old!) Brighton but too expensive..

Grammaretto Thu 11-Apr-19 14:06:10

Sometimes it takes another person to make you realise what you have!
I showed a visiting Italian girl around our little town. Now the natives constantly complain about it. It used to be so much better years ago etc.
True it's lost its major industries but there are some units housing small businesses
But she loved it. You've everything you need she told me.
I felt very proud!
It's a small town but within easy reach of the city and countryside. We still have a library. There are a few shops, a swimming pool, park, gym and 7 churches which are all attended.
Cafes and pubs galore. Hairdressers and estate agents and at least 4 charity shops and sadly a couple of food banks.
Schools, nurseries and clubs for all ages and interests.
We even have a community cinema which shows really good films once a week. There's a stately home nearby too and lots of good walks/cycles.
So all n all. Mustn''t grumble.

lemongrove Thu 11-Apr-19 14:24:36

I like where I live (near Oxford) and plan to stay here, we have all we need, and family close by too.
A good mix of countryside and towns nearby, regular buses, shops and clubs.
It’s quiet here, but neighbours are around ( mainly retired) and we all get on really well.
I used to prefer being somewhere really out in the countryside, but being older ( and retired) this suits me more now.

Lily65 Thu 11-Apr-19 14:30:41

I live in a slum in Salford. The roof leaks but it's handy enough for local amenities such as the pound shop and the off sales.

lemongrove Thu 11-Apr-19 14:35:29

Ellan80 was simply interested in what we like about where we live Lily65 so why the sarcastic post above?

Nonnie Thu 11-Apr-19 15:04:50

I have been happy in all the different places I have lived. Some of the moves were made reluctantly because of DH's job but I made a decision to not look back and make the most of it. What other choice is there? Yes, there are differences in people in different places but it is up to each person to adapt if they want to be part of the community. Be brave, speak to someone or join something, what is the worst that could happen? If you don't like it do something else. I used to find it hard to talk to people I didn't know but I worked on my shyness and now I can do it, possibly because I am old enough to know that if a stranger doesn't take to me it doesn't matter one bit.

KatyK Thu 11-Apr-19 15:18:19

We are in Birmingham but as I said above, everything is within reach and a canal runs along the back of our house so we have a bit of nature too. There is also a nature reserve with lakes within walk distance. Best of both worlds smile

KatyK Thu 11-Apr-19 15:18:47

walking not walk

Anniebach Thu 11-Apr-19 17:06:04

In a Mid Wales market town, surrounded by mountains and rivers, so beautiful

Callistemon Thu 11-Apr-19 17:31:00

It's New Brighton
I used to go there on school trips but haven't been back since primary school!

Callistemon Thu 11-Apr-19 17:32:49

The roof leaks but it's handy enough for local amenities such as the pound shop and the off sales.
I was surprised to have to pay £1.25 for something in our local £ shop yesterday Lily65 shock

I didn't think our town was that upmarket

Framilode Thu 11-Apr-19 18:12:53

In a village north of Oxford. Friendly neighbours, a mix of locals and people who tend to work in Oxford. We haven't been here long and I don't expect to make deep friendships but enough to get by.