I am having my first child soon and my mum will be a granny for the first time. When DP and I decided to try for a baby I knew we would have issues with my mum as she is highly strung and can be smothering at times. Well she was thrilled at first but she’s started to become very anxious about how often she will see her GC as she lives 2hrs away. As I near the end of my pregnancy she has been getting more and more worked up, lately in tears about it. I’ve tried to suggest that she comes up once a week to stay with us overnight and that we will visit her once a month on the weekend, but it doesn’t seem to have helped. I also feel strange having to arrange visitation with my own mother, I had thought that things would be more natural than this and that she’d just come up to visit when we were both free, but she was so worked up I felt I had to give her a schedule just to keep her calm. She now wants to move house to be closer to us but I don’t want her to move her whole life just to be near us. I feel like we would end up feeling obligated to see her daily and I’m not sure that would be healthy. I feel like I need to protect my time with my DP and something inside me doesn’t want to see her more often than I’ve suggested. Please be honest - I feel so confused because I hate seeing her so upset but I don’t feel like I can give her what she wants without sacrificing the family life I’d envisioned. Should I throw the schedule out the window? Should I calm down and let her move here? Should I stick to what my intuition is telling me?
