I know i've got to do it...and i want to......but

Yes get an automatic. There are cars that will park themselves if you are not confident.
Refresher lessons are a good idea; do you have a friend who drives to sit in with you while you drive around until you feel a bit better about it?
You could also ask your GP about hypnotherapy.

I sympathise with you - not a big fan of driving and only drive locally. At the moment, it still suits me to have a car but financially to have it sitting in the drive most of the time it doesn't. It would be financially a better option to use public transport when I can and when not (we live in a village with limited options here) to call a cab. I would say give some lessons a go but don't beat yourself up about it. It's all down to confidence really - good luck.

As others have said - yes to an automatic! Also get a sat nav, there is so much in the way of driving aids these days you will ( I hope) eventually come to enjoy driving. Best of luck! X

Definately Automatic with Satnav & a course of refresher driving lessons. Go for it & enjoy.

Why don't you find out about electric cars. There will be more and more on the roads in the coming years. You would have to have a charging point, but with luck and a nice smile you could get the agency to supply it as part of the deal. They're just like dodgems though you aren't encouraged to slam into other vehicles. Go on! Try one!

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I'm totally understanding you here bytheway!! I had a major operation on my foot 14 months ago - my foot was basically reconstructed and my ankle fused. Knew this was going to be a long recovery and quite life-changing but I then contracted sepsis - don't remember a lot but enough to say I am very lucky to be here. This has left me with many problems including concentration - awful!! I never liked driving much too but I did it when had to buy now I'm sort of feeling pressured to have a go again. My daughter is expecting first grandchild in August. My partner is supportive, has an automatic car and willing to take me somewhere quiet for first drive but so so anxious and full of self-doubt. I'm sorry for interrupting your post but it struck a chord so my thoughts are with you ?

I had a similar break from driving and when circumstances demanded I had to make the decision to take refresher lessons. Living in a rural location, buses are non-existent and taxis prohibitive.

I contacted the AA and the driving instructor took me right back to basics, gradually introducing me to driving to places I knew I would have to cope with. He said it was not an uncommon situation for people to have had a long break like this and he had taught many.

I understand how you feel as I felt the same but I do hope you give it a go if you are able.

I’d always driven but as I got older I got fed up with hearing remarks about older drivers. I googled confidence courses and found the AA do them. I filled in a questionnaire and got 2hours free with an AA instructor who actually taught driving instructors. He was great and gave me the confidence to continue. If you feel happier stick to local driving, no need to do motorways. But the AA would help you with that too. Good luck

Totally understand your fears! I learned to drive at 17 and was an anxious nervous driver from the very start! My DF had a serious car accident when I was a tiny baby and was a constant example to me of the damage cars could do! I avoided driving as much as I could and now am not driving at all. I am thinking of starting driving again too and have been recommended an automatic. It at least takes one stressful thing out of the equation

I have driven automatics for years & love them, I have problems with my left ankle so they are ideal, I can however drive a manual if I have to, you never forget. Confidence is a big thing, plan journeys, get a SatNav I hated them & I can map read .

I had to drive to DM's a few years ago, first time I had made the 300 mile journey on my own, mostly Motorway driving which I hate. I stopped half way for an overnigtht stay, I now do the journey in one with about 3 stops.

Find a good driving school & get back on he road before your DH has to give up driving. My DM was still driving in her 80s only giving up due to failing eyesight. My DH would drive all the time if I had let him but I used to take the keys off him & we often shared long journeys, I have been widowed 6 years so I'm glad I kept up my driving skills despite DVLA keeping me on an Annual Licence I live on the edge of a small Town & at 63 have over 2 years to get my Bus Pass. Taxis are expensive round here especially into larger Towns.

I think automatic is the way to go, don't have to worry about gears etc.

Certainly go for an automatic- they take so much of the hard work out of driving, particularly in towns, and why not have some refresher lessons? I am not one of life's keen drivers but it is a necessity at times. Good luck!

Another vote for an automatic.

You could also have parking sensors fitted, even on an older car. I haven't got them, but wish I had!

Definitely an automatic. Cars have come a long way since you last drove and are much easier to drive. Get one with Sat Nav, inbuilt phone, bleeps for when you get too close to anything. Power steering has made parking a doddle. Choose a white or bright coloured car so people can see you.

Find a driving instructor that is sympathetic and do the advanced driving course/test to give you confidence, it will also give you instruction to drive on motorways should you find the need to use them.

Good luck, hope it all works out.

Agree about automatic and buy a small car. Much easier to park. In our area there are Driving schools that just teach on automatics.
Good Luck! I got back into driving by going out very early on a Sunday morning when the roads are quiet and just drove to supermarket or local places I would need.

Not only does it have a reversing camera, and forward and back sensors but my car parks itself! Get some lessons under your belt and you will be fine. Sooner rather than later though.

I understand that "sick to the stomach feeling". I'm another one who can drive but really hates it! I can manage the actual driving but I am confused by traffic systems and don't trust other drivers to behave safely. I live in fear of being expected to drive back from wherever we go if my husband is taken ill. When my DH (who is an excellent and enthusiastic driver) can no longer drive (sight issues) I shall happily sell the car and spend all that money on taxis. Luckily we have a good bus service too. Coward? Moi?

Definitely a small automatic. Smarts are good but a bit pricey for what they are. They are so small that you can nearly reach out of the window and feel the car behind! Another good thing about Smarts is that they are tall; this makes them easy to get in and out of for someone who isn't very mobile. Also, the panels are plastic (they clip on, so you could even have a change of colour although I think you would have to advise the DVLA unless the car was registered as 'multi') and when I hit something with mine it just bounced off! I had Bluebell for seven years but had to get something a bit bigger when we went from two cars to one, but it was great fun and I miss it.

Can I ask how easy is it to change from manual to automatic? I have always driven manual cars but we want to buy a hybrid so would have to change to automatic. Any help gratefully received.

You can rent a dual control car very cheaply by the hour from large car rental firms. Your DH can take you somewhere quiet (deserted!) and let you take the wheel. After a few goes with DH then take some advanced driving lessons. The instructor will be used to your situation. If it does not go well at first remember that you learn a lot from mistakes and you need to keep going. It might all come back to you though. Good luck and update us.?

You might feel more confident with a female instructor?
I have tried both but found the female instructor calmer and without ego. The male instructor (whom admittedly I passed my test with) was constantly telling me what I had done wrong maybe five minutes after the wrong-doing. In the end I said "If you would just shut up for five minutes, I might be able to concentrate on what I am doing now". I had resolved that if I failed my test I would find a female instructor. As it turned out I passed 2nd time. But I really did not like him or his attitude.

Revis the first time I drove an automatic, I removed my left shoe and sort of tucked that foot out of the way of the pedals!

Definitely get an automatic, always have a Satnav on and have refresher lessons. I nearly gave up my car but my son and family moved to the country which was a nightmare for me as I only like driving in London. However, I do the country drive regularly now and I almost don’t mind it!

Ps - still won’t go on a motorway though!