Gransnet forums

Ask a gran

How old were you when your first grandchild was born?

(207 Posts)
Juno56 Mon 12-Aug-19 20:24:00

Hello, new member here. I joined because my first grandchild will be born in late November. I am 63 and hadn't thought I was particularly old to be a first time grandma. However, when I mentioned the baby to a (slightly older) acquaintance she said: "ooh that's very late; I was under 50. You might not see her grow up"!! I was so taken aback that I had no response. It set me wondering though, as young couples delay starting a family it inevitably means that grandparents are older than was the norm a few years ago. So if people don't mind sharing, how old were you when you became a grandparent?

Nannieh7 Fri 30-Aug-19 19:41:05

I was 39 when my first grandchild was born, she's 17 now, and my youngest GS is coming up 4, with 5 more born in between! I was only 18 when I had the first of my four boys, and 24 when the youngest was born and I can honestly say I wouldn't have had it any other way, I love it! ?

Sara65 Sat 24-Aug-19 21:50:23

I was 45 when the first one was born, 63 when the last one was born with four in between.

I’ve grown into the role, I didn’t really feel like a granny when I was 45, but i enjoy it a lot more now.

Deedi Sat 24-Aug-19 21:43:30

I was 49 when first granddaughter was born and 53 when second GD arrived. So two teenage granddaughters; 19 and 16 yrs old. I'm 68 and enjoy taking them for lunch some weekends (we live quite close), the odd girlie day out (shopping for them!) and best of all they're old enough for mum & dad to allow me to take them for a couple of nights stay in B&B and visit our other son who lives 2hr drive from us. They're often busy,busy,busy, but I get them to commit to a date and lo and behold it usually happens. It works for me smile

silverlining48 Wed 21-Aug-19 12:55:22

I have friends who were 79 and 80 when their first grandchild was born. A year later a second child was born. They dont do childcare, but are actively involved and see them both regularly.

When i first became a gran at 61 we were having some kitchen work done by a man a few years younger than me, and he had just become a great grandad.

Debyangel63 Sun 18-Aug-19 21:18:34

I was 53 turning 54 when my GS was born and 27 when his father, my son was born. My mother was also 27 when she had me and 54 when my son was born, then at 81 became a Great Granny! So if all goes well I might also be able to be a GG at 81. My Gran was 71 when I was born & we still had the best times with her.....So do not let other people’s fears affect you. It’s their issues not yours.

Tigertooth Sun 18-Aug-19 20:46:50

Actually mum had to retire at 65 even though she didn’t want to - dad had died 4 years before so she was dreading forced retirement as she was (and is) so active. Her first GC was born 2 months after she retired -perfect - she had him when I went back to work after 6 months. She had all 4 of mine whilst I worked part time so she really was a co-parent for mine.

Tigertooth Sun 18-Aug-19 20:39:35

My mums first was at 65. She was over the moon with her longed for first grandchild - he was 21 in April and she kept saying “I never thought I’d See them grow up” she has 3 others now around the same age and all at uni and two younger ones of 9 and 11.
My children adore her, she’s always been a second mum, lives around the corner, at 87 she still collects youngest GC from school 3times a week and my children definitely prefer her cooking to mine so they are always popping in to see what grandma has baked. They have an amazing relationship - your friend is rude btw.

harrigran Sat 17-Aug-19 08:58:25

I don't think you are the oldest Conni7, we have a Gran in her 90s who hasn't posted on this thread yet.

DanniRae Sat 17-Aug-19 08:06:27

I think you are Conni7 - isn't it exciting? I was 70 when my daughter (45!!) told me she was pregnant and I just sat there saying "I can't believe it........I can't believe it" smile

Conni7 Fri 16-Aug-19 17:33:46

76 - Am I the oldest?

Joplin Wed 14-Aug-19 23:17:57

71 - my granddaughter is now nearly 9.

Pome Wed 14-Aug-19 21:53:51

I have to admit to thinking that your friend's comment was totally uncalled for & rather unkind. I was 56 when my 1st grandchild was born
after years of thinking I was destined to not have any. Have many friends who can't be grandparents for lots of different reasons so my view is - I'm so grateful to uave them in my life , to enjoy each moment with them & forget about the future.

chezza1 Wed 14-Aug-19 21:50:45

I was 46. My OH was just 36.

narrowboatnan Wed 14-Aug-19 16:09:51

I was 48 and felt dismayed at the thought of being a grandparent so young! When my son told me that there was a baby on the way my initial response was “but I’m not old enough to be a gran!”

MissAdventure Wed 14-Aug-19 15:23:02

smile
Lovely that she had her mum to help out.

sodapop Wed 14-Aug-19 15:19:24

Yes I was too MissA but we worked things out between us. My daughter was widowed so needed extra help for a while. I think the fact that I worked meant she didn't become too dependent.

Bellanonna Wed 14-Aug-19 15:14:27

Thanks Danni, I’m glad to have some company!

MissAdventure Wed 14-Aug-19 15:00:43

There are down sides to being a young Nan.
I was always at work.

ILE35 Wed 14-Aug-19 14:33:23

Another plus to being a young gran is my mum who is great gran still has energy too and loves her GGD as much as her own grandchildren. She often helps out with having her if I need a break myself.

ILE35 Wed 14-Aug-19 14:31:10

I was 42 and never knew I was going to be a gran until weeks before my GD was born. At 45 now I'm her main carer. When out and about most folk assume she is mine as she happens to look so like me.

I don't mind being a young gran and enjoy being able to run around softplay/take her swimming etc and not be too out of puff.

I do wish I could enjoy her more as a granny though than as a "mum" however will do anything for her. She is my world! I'd def love more grandchildren. They are just so special!

Juno56 Wed 14-Aug-19 14:17:44

I'm so glad I posted this thread. It is lovely to read of your differing experiences and good advice. Thank you for sharing. X

GrannyBeek Wed 14-Aug-19 14:03:23

65 when elder stepson had his first boy. He, younger stepson and my son all had little boys last year. Son and DiL expecting again in November when I will be 69. We’re all late starters! DD (only girl in her and the next generation) hasn’t got a bf so I’ll be well into my 70s if she presents me with any.

DanniRae Wed 14-Aug-19 11:34:13

No Bellenonna I have seen a post from someone on here who was 73........and I was 70!

tanith Wed 14-Aug-19 10:41:16

That is the wonder of having GC young, I was only 38 and they’ve all grown up having trips, holidays, sleepovers at Nanny’s house.
Now they are having babies I’ve been renamed Granny as my daughters are now Nanny it’s wonderful that I still have the energy, I’m 71, and able to babysit and join them all on our annual typical British seaside caravan holiday.

Bellanonna Wed 14-Aug-19 09:38:31

I was 71, possibly the oldest first-time gran on here. Two others followed. I make them all laugh (probably just by being myself ?). I do wish I had more energy though.