Missed career choices

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At school, I wanted to be a social worker. But I wasn't academic and would never have got through the qualifications needed.

But I have kind of fallen into sort-of-social-work by accident. I have always done secretarial/admin type work. I ended up working as an administrator within Children's Services, and when the department was completely re-organised, those of us who were admin, found ourselves - almost overnight - acting as telephone social workers, taking referrals, working via telephone with families and recommending appropriate services/support/input.

So I have ended up doing almost the job I wanted to do, accidentally, 35 years after leaving school. And having seen what the social workers put up with, and what they go through with the families, I know I could never have done the role of a full-blown social worker.

I've always said that my dream job would be location scout for film/tv companies

I had wanted to be a pastry or cordon bleu chef. This was in the late 1960’s. However ‘career advice’ in my first year of sixth form informed me I should have left school at 16 to join the local technical college, so I was advised to complete my A Levels and apply for a hotel management course at a polytechnic, which I did. Another career adviser told me to train to be a teacher, but I didn’t enjoy school and was horrified at the thought of working in one!
I was never a hotel manager, ( very few women were in those days) but the qualification opened up lots of doors and I have had a varied career, mainly in marketing and public relations.
Oddly enough I did teach at further education colleges here and abroad for a few years which I loved, but I never became a pastry or cordon bleu chef!

I was lucky, trained as a Nursery Nurse, worked in a nursery school for two years, but the money was rubbish, after a few years in factories started at a major IT company as an operator. I ended up as a software project manager, lots of travel, excellent pension, ironically I employed a live in nanny for a few years.

I had NO career advice as I went to a secondary school and you were either considered only fit to be a cleaner or factory fodder, so I worked in a shop for years.

I was talking about this with a friend whose father and two brothers were all solicitors. I asked her if anyone had suggested that she should become a lawyer herself. "Of course not," she replied. That was back in the sixties. How times have changed: there are more young women lawyers than young men now - and I think it's the same for medicine.
By the way, my friend had a successful career in publishing.

Found out as an adult that my mother had been determined to stop me from going to university. She discouraged me from taking the subjects I would have needed and steered me down the dreaded teaching path. She thought that universities were dens of drugs and sex.

I wish now that I had been to university and had more career options.

A vet. Had the chance, too, but messed up in my late teens and went into a totally different career. I've ended up living just two miles from the veterinary school I'd always intended going to.

Yes, FannyCornforth, it is a sad thread. All these could-have-beens.

Just read your post CBBL so same sort of situation for you to

Glammanana could have written your thread myself,although in my case it was my mum, hairdressers in the 1960’s did a four year apprenticeship and wage was usually about £1.00 per week for most of that! I was the eldest and although lucky enough to go to a grammar school and stay on extra year to do exams I was needed to go and earn a wage.
I ended up doing office work mainly account which considering maths was one of my worst subjects in school was a bit of joke. Didn’t like working in an office at all.

This is such a sad thread isn't it

I wanted to be a sister Tutor (Teacher of Nursing) and even took a two year course - but at sixteen, my mother wanted me brining in money, and got me a job in a local woollen mill. After a few years, I paid for a typing course with a Recruitment Agency and they got me a job in an office. I worked mostly in Insurance, with a spell in Civil Service (Magistrate & Crown Courts) when made redundant. I enjoyed it but regret not being able to go into Nursing, due to lack of support. I also wanted to try Hairdressing at one point - but again, my mother felt this did not pay enough and wasn't prepared to support me through training.

I told the careers teacher at my all girl grammar school that I wanted to study agriculture. She looked horrified and advised me to enter the Civil Service. It took me 5 years to eventually achieve my wish to study agriculture. I eventually ended up having a long and fulfilling career as a software developer, which I have loved. It didn’t exist as a career when I left school. I happened to be working at a large food company in the early days of computerisation and most of the staff weren’t interested in getting involved.

I was a careers adviser for 30 years. I chose this profession as I was sure I would find something I wanted to do! I had been so let down by my own experience of advice that I was determined to do better for everyone I advised. It was a very satisfying career, seeing people find their dreams and make decisions that led them to the right path. My philosophy was to find out what really makes someone tick, often they don’t know themselves but you can help them uncover it.

I wanted to be a journalist (loved writing) but careers advisor threw up his hands and told me I wasn't tough enough (how did he know - or was it because I was a girl??) He offered me 3 choices - secretary, nurse or teacher. Because I was very bright I became a teacher but loathed it. How limited things were back in the early 70's.

*swanning not swimming!

I remember telling our careers advisor I wanted to be a comedian or an actress, she laughed and said I should do a normal job like a normal person do I trained as a nurse and later, a social worker! I would still love to be an actress and truly believe I could do stand up. Still, I am happy working in my husband’s factory, swimming about as I please most the time!

I was quite good at Art at school, and into crafts as well. I have a practical streak so loved to make useful stuff. I did a college course and went into window display which I loved but that was cut short by an accident and lengthy hospital/rehab. There I learned about Occupational therapy. How I loved that, combining craft and helping people. If I'd known about it then I would have stuck in at science at school. As it was I wandered into Office Admin. I still love my crafts tho.

I would love to have gone into nursing in fact I looked at joining the army and doing nursing with them but my mum discouraged me. She wanted me to do something like hairdressing or anything that I could do at home while bringing up children. I was only 16 with no thought of marriage.

I am lucky enough to have been able to follow my dreams into my career. I have taught music all along and hope l have been able to encourage many people to further enjoyment of music. The only thing l regret is that l did not have the courage at the time to apply to one of the top music colleges as l think l would have been capable looking back. However, the smaller one l went to, which was just below the top tier, suited me very well and I made several lifelong friends.

Careers advice in the sixties was dreadful. It happened in the sixth form ,after you had made your subject choices. If you didn’t want to be teacher then the only choice a secretary. I wanted to be a vet but was told I should have done chemistry at o level. (Which I didn’t do!) Ended up teaching.

I left school at 15 got a job in a photographic lab and moved to a studio after 2 years .I was running a department by 19 and by 21 had my own business with my new husband.We've been forced into retirement by Covid,the industry is on its kneees ,but we've had 44 great years meeting lovely people and doing interesting jobs .Every day was different.I wouldn't change a thing well maybe how its ended .We had planned next year to retire .

I bitterly regret not doing medicine. I’ve been so envious of my cousin who has a brilliant career and is now a professor. It wasn’t to be. My parents just wanted me earning at the earliest opportunity. They told me to forget university as they couldn’t afford it as my DF’s income was too high for me to go for free. I wish I’d stood up to them, but we didn’t back then.

Careers advice in the 60s was rubbish for most of us, I think. I was good at acting in school, in local theatre productions and later, college plays - but my mother was always totally discouraging and dismissive of these minor achievements. I think the idea then - if you got any advice at all - was that 'you have to pick a career that will last you for the next forty years and fit in with family life' .

I made sure my own children had access to a lot more information and advice. I never became an actor - it is still a slight regret that I never tried! However, I still gained a lot of satisfaction doing other things - and both my son and my daughter could see from my own job pattern that it was possible to retrain and do something different at whatever age.

But I do think that life is now very hard indeed for young people trying to get work at all, let alone have a career. Example: the 23 year old daughter of a friend who is bilingual and techno-savvy - as well as very well qualified - and with good social skills - is still looking for permanent work a year after graduation. She has 2 part-time jobs and has had to go back home to live as she does not earn enough this way to pay rent in the private sector.

Tempest Sun 20-Dec-20 12:22:55

But be careful what you wish for, filming in exotic locations is not always compatible with family life. 5am start times does not allow for school drop off and pick ups.

From a distance, a job that entails travel and foreign locations does seem exotic and appealing. But it doesn't take long before the words of the song: "Homeward Bound," resonate.

Granny23 Sun 20-Dec-20 12:28:39

Meanwhile a guy who had competed with me for the original apprenticeship but failed the exam, had secured an apprenticeship with another Bank, was a Branch Manager by 30 and an Area Manager by 40. It still rankles to this day.

Who can blame you? Looking back at the treatment of women, it not only shames me but it baffles me too. Just who kept the country running throughout two world wars? The ladies did it all, from making the armaments to driving the public transport. From flying the aircraft from factory to airfields to supporting the armed forces. Then, post war, they were all suddenly deemed incapable.