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Self improvement

(22 Posts)
Kswainson16 Tue 02-Feb-21 02:44:36

I've always enjoyed self improvement books ever since I fell upon one by chance in a library when I was 22. I remember being amazed that people would openly share they're secrets on how to achieve success ,and have been interested ever since. How do people here still look to self improve?

Lauren59 Tue 02-Feb-21 06:25:27

At the age of almost 62, I’ve given up a lot of self-improvement goals and instead focus on doing whatever makes me happy every single day. The self-improvement goals I do have are to lose weight, eat healthier food, and be debt-free. When I was young, I would strive to improve almost everything about myself each new year (never accomplished this) but in my retirement I’ve found comfort in self-acceptance. I love being older!

grandMattie Tue 02-Feb-21 06:31:53

I feel the same Lauren. I have spent my entire life trying to be the perfect whatever “they” wanted me to be. Now? I’m the me I’m happy to be. I no longer give a monkey’s.
Old is good for a lot of things...

FannyCornforth Tue 02-Feb-21 06:32:15

I was recently thinking about starting a thread about Self Improvement books.
I'd be interested to hear if anyone has read a decent one. I went through a stage about ten years ago when I read lots and lots of them. It's a huge business.
I think that some of the best advantage that I've had was from an old colleague. She said that instead of focusing on doing lots of things quite well, we should instead focus on getting better at what we are good at already.

FannyCornforth Tue 02-Feb-21 06:33:10

Advice, not advantage angry

Lucca Tue 02-Feb-21 06:45:28

Honestly ? I’m too lazy and cynical to read self improvement books.

The only book of that kind I read was one on giving up smoking, which worked.

FannyCornforth Tue 02-Feb-21 06:54:21

Oh Lucca, I agree that that they are a load of rubbish - and I should know, having read so many! They prey on the miserable and vulnerable. Not that I'm miserable and vulnerable... although, perhaps at the time...

Was it Allan Carr, the stop smoking book?

Dwmxwg Tue 02-Feb-21 07:07:32

I prefer motivational quotes (like yours Fanny)
My PT usually has one each week on the wall of his gym/garage
I like Dumbledore’s “Happiness can be found even in the darkest times, if one only remembers to turn on the light”

Kim19 Tue 02-Feb-21 07:21:33

I think for me improvement is recognising a particular personal flaw and trying to eliminate it. One at a time, of course. Way to go!

M0nica Tue 02-Feb-21 07:23:59

I have thumbed through self-improvement books over the years, but none have been motivating enough for me to bother to read them, still less, buy them.

I think I will always want to be a better person than I am, but I decided when I was very young that I am who I am, and there was no point in pretending to be someone different. Doing that causes more problems than it solves.

Lucca Tue 02-Feb-21 07:53:55


Oh Lucca, I agree that that they are a load of rubbish - and I should know, having read so many! They prey on the miserable and vulnerable. Not that I'm miserable and vulnerable... although, perhaps at the time...

Was it Allan Carr, the stop smoking book?

Yes it was. I didn’t read it cover to cover. But it had good simple ideas for example just pick a date to give up and do it. There’s no right or wrong time. Smoking doesn’t help stress it just makes your body anxious for the next cigarette. Cutting down is not the way forward etc etc,
Partner and I both quit a week before the start of a new school year, about twenty years ago

PECS Tue 02-Feb-21 09:46:17

I like to continue improve my knowledge & skills... in little ways...trying a new recipe , learning to grow a particular plant, a new craft.
During lockdown I have been on some virtual walking tours of cities , joined an Art History course & briefly, Joe Wickes grin

Blossoming Tue 02-Feb-21 10:22:35

I don’t think I’ve ever read a self improvement book, but I do like to challenge myself. I think that’s partly a result of my brain injury, having been given a very bad prognosis I wanted to prove it wrong. I find a lot of people who’ve been through a life threatening experience feel the same.

polomint Tue 02-Feb-21 10:39:54

Self improvement is a work in progress for me haha

Nanano Mon 08-Feb-21 09:16:38

I’ve been feeling very sad and overly emotional this past few days . Lost an uncle , a good friend and a neighbour in January. I cry at the least thing. I go to the loo in work and cry .
I have 4 daughters who work on the frontline of the NHS . I try to be strong for them as that share their work worries and stories. My youngest who works in a covid ward took an overdose early December. Thankfully she is doing well at the moment and has a new job to start in March .
I think I’m just overwhelmed and done in . I had covid over Christmas too and find I get so tired .

Kate54 Mon 08-Feb-21 09:22:54

I’ve improved my French no end during this lockdown by binge watching Call My Agent on Netflix, Highly recommended.

Susan56 Mon 08-Feb-21 10:07:55

I’m with Lauren and grandmattie!

Nanano, I’m sorry that you have been having such a sad and difficult time.There are some really supportive threads on gransnet.The Good morning thread,soops kitchen and the Black Dog gang where you will get support and advice from the lovely grans💐

Luckygirl Mon 08-Feb-21 10:12:38

Who defines success?

I cannot bear these sort of books.

Takes all sorts to make a world.

muse Mon 08-Feb-21 11:06:57

I had a friend years ago that bought masses of Happiness books. He was always very envious of people that made what he called, 'easy money' or 'too much money'. What he wanted was to earn a lots, without too much effort or stress. He thought the books would have the answer.

I did read half a book once, the contents of which I found common sense, I suppose and achievable for some. Think of your interests that make you happy and turn the interest into a job.

Tangerine Mon 08-Feb-21 11:10:42

I think they can be interesting to read but I wouldn't slavishly follow them.

You can pick up one or two tips.

I just try to approach each day as it comes, especially at the moment, and I try to be positive in life generally but it isn't always easy.

Casdon Mon 08-Feb-21 11:11:27

You’ve been through a really horrible time*Nanano*, the only self improvement you need at the moment is to look after yourself as well as you possibly can. Now’s the time to indulge yourself with lovely bath products, chocolate, fiction, and lighthearted films.

I have found some self improvement books etc. useful - if they are practically biased. I’m thinking of doing the OU course on how to manage your money, as investments, going for the best deals etc. bores me to death, but now I’m retired is a good time to do it. Also things like ‘Couch to 5k’ are surely a good thing?

M0nica Tue 09-Feb-21 06:31:53

Nanano, what a rotten time you are having. I would imagine that at a time like this, the last thing you need is a self-improvement book. Now is the time to reread well loved books with happy endings.