Code of cooking when having guests.

Thanks for your messages and thoughts. Much appreciated. I may have sounded peeved at the time when I wrote it - I wasn't really thinking logically nor did I have time to cool down and think things through!

True, next time I'll do something that can have meat added or not. So extra veggies in the one to compensate no meat.

I do eat fish and chicken in between other times, so maybe a fish dish might also be an option as some vegetarians do eat fish.

Thanks again.

Yes I would always cook a seperate veggie meal for a vegetarian. But sometimes it doesn't work out...

The last time we had friends round for a BBQ, there was 6 of us in total, one of whom was vegetarian.

I did chicken and chorizo kebabs and sausages, and for the vegetarian, vegetable kebabs and lots of different salads. The vegetarian ate the chicken kebabs and swerved the veggie ones! And ate sausages!
I did say... I thought you were vegetarian? (I probably hadn't made enough meat kebabs) and she said... I am 99% of the time! ?

I’ve seen that happen justme !
I can understand some would find it very difficult/impossible to cook meat dishes twinlolly and so that’s where meat eaters lose out. I know someone who struggles with the majority of vegetables and so struggles with various dishes on menus (and in days of old, at friends houses) which include vegetables because of that. If only there was a nice name for it - it would help their problem to cause less anxiety at gatherings. Before anyone says meat-eater or fussy eater, it really is not that simple .

Sorry, I just do not get it, why does eating meat preclude you from also eating meals which do not include meat and why are these meals considered odd?

I am an omnivore I eat a wide range of different foods and put them together in a wide variation of ways. I regularly eat meals that contain meat, fish and dairy products. I also regularly eat meals based entirely based on vegetables, beans, nuts etc etc.

My solution if I have people for a meal with different food eating patterns is a cold buffet or pick and mix meal, like a curry, or pasta and a selection of sauces, one of which would contain meat, for those who eat it.

I do not think any one set of foods or eating patterns is any better or taster than any other. There are thousands, possible tens of thousands of different animals, insect, vegetables, fruit and grains and other feedstuffs in this world. All of us eat only a limited selection of these and what we eat is governed by culture, availability, taste and principle.

I find all this poncing around by people choosing different eating patterns and thinking this represents some form of virtue in them, whether vegan, vegetarian or carnivore, quite ridiculous. We all have guilding principles that govern how we eat. I try and eat environmentally and there are a list of foodstuffs that I avoid when eating in restaurants, unless I know their provenance. To which my response to myself, as to others, is, so what.

You seem to resent these people so I wouldn't invite them tbh.

Lollin

I’ve seen that happen justme !
I can understand some would find it very difficult/impossible to cook meat dishes twinlolly and so that’s where meat eaters lose out. I know someone who struggles with the majority of vegetables and so struggles with various dishes on menus (and in days of old, at friends houses) which include vegetables because of that. If only there was a nice name for it - it would help their problem to cause less anxiety at gatherings. Before anyone says meat-eater or fussy eater, it really is not that simple .

But vegetarian meals aren’t about vegetables anymore than meat based meals are about vegetables. It’s such a shame that there is still this outmoded view of vegetarian cooking. People are really missing out on a whole world of culinary delights. Honestly ?

I don’t think DH will ever be able to eat other people’s cooking again. He has great difficulty swallowing, so everything has to be cooked to a mush. He does enjoy a roast dinner but it takes him an hour to eat it.
So cooking for others has more snags that just vegetarian or not. If a guest thinks the cook won’t be able to cater to their needs, they won’t accept the invitation.
Something to be said for lockdown after all!

Cabbie21

I don’t think DH will ever be able to eat other people’s cooking again. He has great difficulty swallowing, so everything has to be cooked to a mush. He does enjoy a roast dinner but it takes him an hour to eat it.
So cooking for others has more snags that just vegetarian or not. If a guest thinks the cook won’t be able to cater to their needs, they won’t accept the invitation.
Something to be said for lockdown after all!

That’s sad

JustMe I did chicken and chorizo kebabs and sausages, and for the vegetarian, vegetable kebabs and lots of different salads. The vegetarian ate the chicken kebabs and swerved the veggie ones! And ate sausages!

Sometimes a good meaty bbq is too much to miss! My mum was like that, eating everything on offer! ?

As someone else mentioned - I would provide a buffet. Lots of different salads, cheeses, cold cuts, fish, flat breads, baguettes. Jacket potatoes/new potatoes etc.
Everyone can then help themselves.. easy peasy!

I’m a meat eater but a vegetable lover especially. A vegan friend cooks lovely tasty meals without meat and I enjoy trying them. Just last week she cooked a vegetable chilli and savoury potato wedges (we ate in the garden) and it was delicious. Didn’t miss the meat at all.
I wouldn’t expect a vegan friend to prepare meat for me - conversely if a vegan friend came to lunch and I was doing a roast for example, I would expect them to load the plate with veg and gravy and just swerve the meat. With seasonings, herbs and stuffings it is still a tasty meal.

Yes I agree its not difficult to produce veggie alternatives ( not that I do the cooking) for non meat eaters and its only an occasional thing Twinlolly. I do find that vegetarians tend to be a bit evangelical about it, I choose to eat meat at times and don't think I should be criticised for this.

Hear hear Monica. Look at me, look at me!!!

I don’t really understand your attitude twinlolly don’t you want to accommodate your friends choices if someone comes round (I don’t have a circle of friends that do meal invites we usually meet at coffee shops or cafes, restaurants) but when I did I wanted to cater to make everyone happy I notoriously remember many years ago hosting some overseas university mature students for Christmas I was sent two Muslims no pork a Buddhist who was vegetarian and an African meat eater I made all the adjustments necessary to keep everyone happy and it’s the best Christmas I ve ever had and will stay in my memory for ever

Surely hosting is about trying to make people feel welcome wanted and understood a much bigger investment than cooking a meal

sodapop

Yes I agree its not difficult to produce veggie alternatives ( not that I do the cooking) for non meat eaters and its only an occasional thing Twinlolly. I do find that vegetarians tend to be a bit evangelical about it, I choose to eat meat at times and don't think I should be criticised for this.

I have two vegetarian friends that I cook for relatively regularly - they’ve been vegetarian all their adult lives and it’s never mentioned at all, it’s just part of who they are. Actually I have a lot of sympathy with the vegetarian viewpoint - they’re right imo

What does hosting lockdown friends mean ???

I am not a vegetarian but I often eat vegetarian as there are some lovely meals out there and if I was cooking for vegetarian friends I would certainly choose one of them. There’s aubergine parmigiana, chilli beans with rice, mushroom risotto, aubergine and red lentil lasagna to name but a few. All delicious and substantial.

I have a friend who chooses not to eat meat, and is also a fussy eater with a long list of things she thinks she might not like because name puts her off, many times have walked length of a high street searching for somewhere she will settle for if we are out or in holiday, pandemic has broken the habit now I am not in a rush to start the situation over again.
She even fusses about the coffee temperature, it would be nice for my preferences to be taken into account for once, but being easy to please I just grit my teeth and go along with it, her list of cant , will not eats has grown over the 40 years we have been friends, I love her really though

When I got together with my husband, 36 years ago, his two children from his first marriage were quite new to vegetarianism, so it was a learning curve for all of us, I enjoyed experimenting with vegetarian cooking and we had some great meals together. I did ask his daughter way back then what sort of things she was eating more of now she was a vegetarian, her reply "sweets and chocolate" so she wasn't too difficult to please, she is still a committed vegetarian, dropped the sweets and chocolate a while back. I've always found it relatively easy to cater for non meat eaters, an alternative main course to go with what ever vegetables we are eating if it's a sit down meal or several vegetarian choices with buffets. Vegetarianism is pretty mainstream these days.

I’m rather struggling to understand the issue here. It’s not the matter of differing dietary needs and preferences that I’m questioning but the circumstances of the past year when the majority of us have been sacrificing so much by not entertaining or being entertained.
My take on this is, once we are able to responsibly socialise with family and friends again, let’s help the hospitality sector get back on its feet be eating out. Group members can then eat whatever they like and concentrate on enjoying the company of others again.

I am a Vegetarian and would be perfectly happy to be served a shop bought Vegetarian meal if I were the odd one out at a friend's house. I have taken along my own food at a Christmas meal.I'm not trying to be awkward by being Veggie I just can't stand the thought of eating an animal.

It does seem a bit of a one way street sometimes. I was at a convention where self catering accommodation was shared and the six of us agreed to do one meal each for the week.

The meat eaters were happy to cater for the veggies, but when I told the veggies that I couldn’t have nuts or pulses (allergies/intolerance) they both said you’ll have to get your own dinner then.

?

Vegetarianism is pretty mainstream these days.

Yes, resulting in so much choice in the shops nowadays.

Many years ago I made a nut roast from a pack from a health food shop for a vegetarian DD at Christmas and although I followed the instructions it was dreadful!

I would cook a dish of pasta,thats easy enough.

timetogo2016

I would cook a dish of pasta,thats easy enough.

My DH hates pasta

You can please some of the people all of the time etc