Cremation that no-one attends

My body is donated to science. I’ve been told that the family can have the body back after 3 years.
I asked my daughter if she wanted the body back. The answer was, Nooooo!!!!!!

A couple of years ago our neighbour died. He had left instructions that no one should attend his cremation apart from the vicar. So the hearse arrived outside his house and in hopped the vicar. In the meantime his wife and family had gone to the local pub to celebrate his life.

We have Parsee friends in India (well, just one now, since his wife died.). Their bodies go on a very high platform for birds and Nature to see to. IIRC the places are called, ‘Palace of the Winds’ - we saw the Mumbai one from a distance while we were there some years ago - quiet place, surrounded by trees.

Obviously not practical for many millions, but seemed like a nice idea to me.

Posted too soon. I've known of one direct cremation, but the ashes were scattered by family in a place of significance to them, followed by a respectful lunch and visit down memory lane.

My feeling is that funerals are for the living, not the dead. While I'd always respect and uphold the type of funeral someone had personally wanted, I would hope they would give some thought to the impact it might make on those left behind. For many, the grieving process could be hampered by the lack of any "marking" of the dead person's life.

Yep ?

A friend chose this, and for there to be no service / funeral tea / celebration either. This was pre-Covid, and I found it very awkward.
Although he was a close friend, he told no-one but his wife, as he knew we would tell him that WE would want to attend and celebrate in some way. Actually, his wife also found it awkward - she would have wanted a small celebration of his life. Instead, she began to arrange lunches & dinners with friends as a sort of marker, then Covid got in the way.

I don't have strong feelings about cremation alone, but I have realised that I do have strong feelings about some sort of marking of a life. We lined our main village street a few times during Covid, and at least that represented something.

A Tibetan funeral Baggs! ?

I'm up for this. Thank you for starting the thread, Athenia, as I wasn't aware of this possibility before today.

Mind you, if my offspring want to feed me to vultures after any useful bits (if any!) have been donated to people who need them, that's fine too.

Me. I have chosen this. My sons know the details.

A friend of mine had this. There wasn't even a memorial service. It was what he wanted.

I arranged this for our auntie two years ago. She died peacefully in the nursing home I arranged for her to be taken away by private ambulance. The funeral directors arranged the cremation at the local crematorium. I was given her ashes and I chose one of my favourite places to disperse them. Every time I go there I think of our auntie we were very close.
It was what she wanted it was less costly than a usual cremation or burial. I thought it was perfect actually no bothering with long lost relatives or arranging food etc. It’s what I would want for my family to carry on with theirs lives.

My parents have both signed up for this, Pure cremation. No one present. It's their wishes so I respect that. As a family they want us to get together after at some point to scatter their ashes.

Actually, nobody except the crematorium workers are present when the body is cremated. It doesn’t happen at the service at the crematorium when relatives are there, but hours or even a couple of days after.

My Aunt aged 92 has announced that this is how she wants to shuffle off.

This seems quite widespread now, certainly pleased its an option, I'm not bothered about a funeral.

We were more or less forced into Direct Cremation with MIL during Covid last year, as most of her elderly ACs were shielding, so were some of the GCs.
We have seriously thought about it, but at the end of the day it’s really up to the ones who are left to do what they want to isnt it?
Apart from stipulating a cremation with Family only attending, we will leave it up to them I think.

I think it's an excellent idea.

Not quite the same i know, but it had become increasingly common, pre- covid, to have a church service after the burial or cremation. Then it can be more of a celebration of a life.

I think these funerals are a good idea. When my BIL died in Germany he was cremated privately, not sure the crematorium even had public access. Ashes were released to the family and it was up to them as to what kind of commemoration they had.

I would opt for this, too. I simply don't want my loved ones be present at this moment and I don't want them having memories like this, so it looks like a perfect arrangement to me.

Similar to KatyJ my mum had a Mass at her church but stipulated that no one go to the cremation, the Priest went and then joined us back at Mum’s for a wake which was full of chat and laughter about a lovely, funny lady.

Yes. It’s becoming more popular it’s what my dad had 10 years ago, my mum also wants the same and me. We had a knees up at home afterwards.

Hello Athenia I have just seen your post and thought you might be interested in the thread on the Bereavement forum. There are 42 posts available on the subject of direct cremation. Hope you find this useful.

It’s called “simple cremation”. Personally, that’s what I would opt for and then have a memorial service & great party afterwards…. But since I’ll be dead, I really don’t care.