Friend’s mystery ill health

I think that's a bit unfair Nannan2 the physical symptoms experienced by people with mental health problems are very real and should not be dismissed as
"all in her head"

A friend of a friends wife was really very poorly and they had no idea what it was(not old either, late 30's early 40-ish) they hinted it was all in her head, despite not even being able walk-& at one point her hubby was told to prepare for the worst- they never did find out what it really was, but thankfully she began to get better, now shes at home, still has a wheelchair, but is getting better each day.Drs seem to put everything on a psychological blame list when they don't know or can't be bothered to research what something is.

They check my vitamin D as ive to have blood tests every few months (missed some tests in covid times though) due to one of my tablets im on for life can effect levels- at one point i was found to be vitamin D deficient,& given supplements, then the extra was stopped, but then it was my thyroid that was low.so i was put on thyroid pills.But still i lose some hair, and am constantly tired, but my last blood tests were 'normal' i was told.makes no sense, and i doubt they can raise the thyroid dose anyway as I'm also on warfarin.?

I find it very strange that a psychiatrist has been recommended but your friend has refused this. If I were in the state you describe I would do anything. I’m sure most of us would. I’ve mentioned Munchausens already. Sufferers can make themselves physically ill and refuse the treatment which will help - from a psychiatrist. Why would she be so reluctant to try this when seemingly she has willingly seen numerous other medical professionals?

Thank you all for your input. A friend saw her recently and was shocked-from a smart elegant lady-she’s now lost weight and is “bedraggled “ and has lost all
Hope too. I keep asking her by text what the latest is; she’s had a blood test recently, don’t know what for. I asked if she has any further med appointments eg psychiatrist but friend who saw her said she’s lost faith in everything and now won’t see anyone or take any meds

Unfortunately, a good number of both physicians and surgeons do tend to suggest consulting a psychiatrist, which would obviously help if the symptoms are caused by a psychiatric problem, but do no good at all if making the suggestion is, as I suspect, a default setting when other consultants are stumped.

'Surely your friend can ask for and be given a copy of all her medical records showing which tests have been done and the results.

With this information her GP might be able to spot the one relevant test no-one has thought of.

Even the best of doctors may genuinely have forgotten a specific illness, or dismissed it because the patient is not exhibiting typical symptoms of it.

A neurologist told me my symptoms are caused by stress, but he has since been proved wrong.

So she refused to see a psychiatrist as had been recommended by a neurologist? If you really were this ill, and didn’t know why, wouldn’t you do anything in the hope of a cure? See whoever an ‘ologist’ recommended? This sounds extremely uncharitable but her symptoms are getting her a lot of attention from a lot of people - as is sought by Munchausens sufferers who would not want to see a psychiatrist for obvious reasons. Perhaps you might ask one of these retired medics about that. If she is getting private medical advice I’m sure it wouldn’t be difficult to get an ‘overall check’ from a private hospital, though you say she has had endless tests already. Presumably these retired medics will be able to understand what tests she has had and what further tests might be tried.

Sorry I mentioned Calendargirl in my post at 06.18
I wrongly thought that she was the original poster, not Newquay
Apologies to you both

Thank you for all your contributions. She is in a position to have private visits and scans etc but they don’t seem to be doing any good. After she’d seen a neurologist he suggested a psychiatrist as, as we all know, many of these psychical symptoms can follow trauma-she was not receptive to that sadly. She’s is such a bad way I don’t think she knows which way to turn. There’s a group of us concerned-including retired medics-and we all feel so helpless.
As I’ve said before i don’t know who you can go to to do overall checks eg specific bloods and for other diseases mentioned here.
They’re managing on ready meals now. She doesn’t want any of us to visit and she doesn’t want to even talk on the phone which is SO unlike her. She WhatsApp me every now and then which is how we keep in touch.

Sorry - Munchausen’s Syndrome, I should have said.
But again, absolutely nothing related to FND

OP, Calendargirl has posted at 10.21 that her friend has been diagnosed with Functional Neurological Disorder, which has nothing do to with Munchausen’s Disease.

I knew a young person who was also diagnosed with this, it mainly affected his movement and balance.
He had to be home schooled due to it. It was a very sad situation.

I don’t think OP will come back EP. Her friend has consulted numerous specialists, had scans and ‘endless tests’. Whether this has been done privately or on the NHS isn’t clear. We are simply told that the friend is able to pay. The only specific suggestion mentioned was seeing a psychiatrist. The friend is attracting much attention though, which is what sufferers of Munchausens seek. I have already put forward that suggestion, which would tie in with the psychiatric referral and we are not told if that has been acted upon. If my suggestion is correct, it wouldn’t have been as sufferers do not want to be ‘cured’. I must emphasise, before I am criticised, that I have no medical training. Also that I am not unsympathetic or unfeeling. But I have encountered this in the past, albeit the ‘by proxy’ variant.

Do you know what is your friend's diet?

Is she vegan?

I totally agree sodapop I think some posters are very quick to pick on ElderlyPersons posts when he is only offering ideas like we all are, he s made it very clear he’s has no professional qualifications but is trying to be helpful in thinking of things it could be.
I mentioned Thyroid problems, diabetes, and lymes disease
No one jumped on my ideas

I note that Germanshepherdmum suggested Munchausens syndrome but was not brought to task over it as Elderlyperson was.
Psychiatric illness can produce a whole raft of physical symptoms which are very real for the patient. A psychiatric consultation should not be ruled out.
I hope your friend gets help soon Newquay

I really empathise with your friend, I was sent away from GP and the hospital feeling like a hypochondriac. I was treated for mental health issues I didn't have which made everything so much worse!

I eventually got to the point where I was barely on my feet, anxious, paranoid, shaking continuously and just not fit for life in general but not really aware because they were treating me, I should have been getting better in my mind so I was just forcing myself to carry on!

I then went to the doctor for bursitis in my hips thinking, well, I have a previous diagnosis of this, they can't send me away, they will have to treat it. That is the point where the doctor decided to test my thyroid. No idea why she made that connection but it saved my life.

I had thyrotoxicosis and was diagnosed with Graves disease. I was in a life threatening situation with a heart rate over 200 at times and literally every symptom. Except luckily, no thyroid eye disease.

Tell her to keep fighting, just because they haven't found the cause doesn't mean her symptoms should be disregarded.

I've no idea, EP.

MissAdventure

I'm "guilty" of it, too.
Nothing to worry about, because it may just offer an avenue that hasn't been explored.

But it is not guilty, even with guilty expressed in quotes.

Do people really want a thread where the sound of silence prevails?

FannyCornforth

EP that ‘hysterical conversion’ that you mention, it sounds just like a natural reaction for many people. I thought that it was normal to feel sick, knots in stomach etc if you are distressed.

I am not a clinician and as far as I know 'yes'.

But I think that it can be more severe and long lasting as a result of extreme distress such as witnessing a bad road accident.

I saw a film once (documentary medical film, not a movie) on television about some American soldiers in World War 2 were so distressed at what they had seen that they could not walk, and in the film a doctor injects a man with something and he is then able to walk and he is amazed and is saying "I can walk, I can walk' as he slowly walks round the room while a doctor and a nurse watch.

I'm "guilty" of it, too.
Nothing to worry about, because it may just offer an avenue that hasn't been explored.

MayBeMaw

That is the second time you have said I am not a clinician but …..EP and have gone on to offer potential causes of physical conditions.
There are several doctors and other health professionals on GN and even they would hesitate to offer even an online suggested diagnosis to a total stranger (in fact “friend of a stranger”) in this way.
Yes, some of us can contribute opinions from our own shared experience and this can help OP to feel supported or even encouraged to seek further medical help.
But it can be extremely dangerous and is at best irrelevant to post anecdotal Dr Google- type diagnoses.

I have not purported to offer a diagnosis.

What I have done is state openly and clearly that I am not a clinician and then have written something about a medical condition or vitamins. So, most careful to not to seem to diagnose, most careful to not be telling anyone what to do,. but jjust suggesting things to consider doing, like askimg the doctor if the blood tests included vitamin B12 level. Pointimg out that I am not a clinician so it is just chat in a forum.

That seems a reasonable thing for me to have done given that the thread has been added to Gransnet.

It is entirely up to the lady as to whether she asks her doctor that question. I do not need to know whether the lady does that or not, nor the answer if she does ask.

But, if the question is asked, then the answer could be 'yes' and it is fine, or it could be 'no' and a B12 test be done, the result obtained and either it comes back as fine or indicates that the level is very low, in which case action can be taken, which could be an injection.

Some people have a vitamin B12 injection every three months/

So, I mentioned vitamin B12. If the test has been done the question to the doctor and the answer could take less than a minute.

So a list of questions about vitamin B12, vitamin D, and coeliac disease to consider asking the doctor. Nobody here is purporting to diagnose the lady's issues, would you rather that nobody in this forum mentioned such things based just on their own personal experiences, the experiences of friends, people at work years ago and so on?

EP that ‘hysterical conversion’ that you mention, it sounds just like a natural reaction for many people. I thought that it was normal to feel sick, knots in stomach etc if you are distressed.

That is the second time you have said I am not a clinician but …..EP and have gone on to offer potential causes of physical conditions.
There are several doctors and other health professionals on GN and even they would hesitate to offer even an online suggested diagnosis to a total stranger (in fact “friend of a stranger”) in this way.
Yes, some of us can contribute opinions from our own shared experience and this can help OP to feel supported or even encouraged to seek further medical help.
But it can be extremely dangerous and is at best irrelevant to post anecdotal Dr Google- type diagnoses.

It might be worth checking how M.E. (CFS) and fibromyalgia or other autoimmune illnesses affect people to see if your friend's symptoms are similar. I've had both for years. Annoyingly most of my family think its in my head.