Distant grandkids

Don’t despair! My youngest grandchild who lives the other side of the world refused to have anything to do with me each time I visited. I was a stranger who took up residence every so often. On my most recent visit I found a totally changed child. Chatty, animated, happy to play games, paint with me & read to me. It took 9 years but was worth the wait. I’m sure your grandson will learn to love and accept you as he grows older especially if you manage regular Facetime or Zoom chats. (I hope it doesn’t take 9 years tho’ !?)

During lockdown I was anxious about coping on my own in isolation etc My daughter purchased me a Facebook Portal and we used that. It meant we could both get a coffee made then call each other up for a video chat. Saw my two grandchildren and heard their news too. This might be something for you as a family moving forward.

Don’t try too hard we watched our auntie do that with her long distant grandson. Just be yourself and let him get used to you at his pace. You have waited long enough for this so just enjoy it.

Enjoy the time you have left and do not obsess with bonding with him

Thanks for the advice I'm sure you're right. I just wanted it to be perfect I suppose and am old enough to know its not always like that.
Your words have made me feel easier so thank you

He’s only 3 and honestly you can’t force something like this he doesn’t know you if it’s the first time he’s met you he will come round in time as he gets older. It’s not going to happen after one visit. My relationship with my abroad GC will never be as close as that with GC that live close by. Keep in touch with him by FaceTime and sending him cards or small gifts/books/games from time to time and build the relationship with him slowly.

Just enjoy his company and don't expect "bonding" - however you might define this. I am not really sure what is meant by this. What exactly is it that you are wanting from him?

I honestly think you are expecting too much. You are a virtual stranger to him, and it is inevitable that you will get more out of the relationship than he will.

Take joy in his company and what you do have - do not expect anything from him in return. I am so glad that you are finally able to be with him, but do not spoil the experience with unrealistic expectations. Do not go home feeling it has failed, when it might simply be that you had set your sights unrealistically high.

Children bond with their parents; with others they hopefully have friendly relationships and that is fine and that is all.