Just feeling low

I understand as my GCs are grown up now.
It is hard after so much time caring for them but you have helped to make them the independent people they are.
I hope you feel better soon 💐

I miss my son, who hasn't lived locally to me for a number of years. At one time he needed a lot of support but now he phones regularly for a chat.

I also miss my GD with whom I spent quite a bit of time when she was small. I see her less often, but we have a good relationship. She's old enough now to contact me independently and when she sends me a picture of something she's made I know that she's done it because she wants to and because she knows I'll be interested.

I've cried at times about missing them both, but those small contacts bring me joy because it means they're remembering me.

Thank you so much to all of you for positive and kind comments which I shall take on board.

I can relate to this feeling, Skydancer. I agree with the suggestions that you talk to your GP, or find a counsellor. I'm wondering if you are feeling as if you are of no use to anyone any more; that can bring you down a lot. Remember YOU STILL MATTER AND YOU STILL HAVE VALUE, even if you children and grandchildren no more need the same kind of care.

Everyone's different, but I have found recently that I've become a bit more 'okay' about myself, and all I've done over the last months is so write in a notebook every day three things that I am grateful for and three things I've achieved the day before. Often they are tiny things, but sitting with a pen and notebook and trying to think of things helps (I think!). Also I am listening to a short guided meditation each morning.

Basically I wasn't expecting much to improve, but I'm delighted to say it has! And at no cost (free app Insight Timer for the meditations).

Sending a BIG hug and

Oh I’m sorry, can’t offer anything just a cyberhug.
I’m lucky I’m generally upbeat but do get anxious occasionally and worry about the what ifs and my whole family bubble bursting.
Meanwhile I just count the blessings.
I think you are correct we are all made differently.

Skydancer, I ' feel' for you and am so sorry you are feeling so low. I haven't been in your situation so can't really advise. You obviously know where this feeling of loss has come from , have you had any professional support to help you ? You are very courageous to keep this from your children. Couldn't not respond to your post ! Today everyone has Coronation Fever and are out and about having a great time so I really understand how bad you feel today.
Please try and access some help - GP?
Of course I don't know where you are but the 🌞is shining here so I send you some happy sunshine and I think the sun will shine again for you. 💐💐

I don't know what to say Skydancer accept that depression by it's very nature sucks the joy out of the things we have in life that should bring us joy, and seems to encourage us to want more regardless of what we already have.

You haven't lost your AC or GC, they're still an intrinsic part of your life and like you, they'll have interesting days out, hobbies, holidays etc and good friends that will take up much of their time.

Would it help to talk to your GP and/or seek counselling that could enable you to enjoy the life you have because the old people (who) seem really happy are probably just making the most of what they have, as many of us do.

I hope this will pass .