Can you suggest a gift?

What about a portable fan? Sometimes hospitals can get rather warm, and you could perhaps put a few drops of essential oil on it.

shysal

4711 cool sticks and tissues are still available. They were always the gift chosen for hospital visits when I was a child.

I'd forgotten those.

They'd be lovely in hot weather or on journeys for anyone, too.

My mum always used solid 4711 on her forehead.
A hand or foot massage with hand cream is very relaxing. Favourite music helps too.

shysal

4711 cool sticks and tissues are still available. They were always the gift chosen for hospital visits when I was a child.

My grandmother always advocated these solid 4711 sticks whenever anyone was poorly. We used to buy them for her.
The other day among various photos I found a letter from her thanking us for her birthday present of a bottle of brandy. She was a very Victorian old lady and I smiled as I read that she had this when she “was feeling a little off”. And she wrote that I would be surprised as to how it helps. Not appropriate in your poor aunt’s case but think the 4711 is a good idea as easy to use.

What about taking some family photos? Something to talk to her about old times.
When DMiL was in hospital she was in quite a lot of pain but still enjoyed seeing familiar faces and listening to our chatter. She had boxes of fudge, untouched, on her side table.
I would think it's you she'd like to see and nothing more

4711 cool sticks and tissues are still available. They were always the gift chosen for hospital visits when I was a child.

Thank you all for your thoughtful and helpful suggestions.

Spending time with her, reading to her, talking to her, or, if she gets tired easily, just sitting with her. If she is up to it, asking her about her childhood and younger days.

Wipes are good - the 4711 ones are lovely, and she will probably be familiar with the fragrance. It is lovely to be able to wipe your hands clean or your face and neck and feel refreshed when you are in hospital. I am sorry she is so unwell.

re; crocheted blankets upthread...
Distinctive blankets/knee rugs are used in the hospital that cared for my MiL to help patients identify their own bed - one hospital bed looks very much like another after all.

Company is either appreciated greatly or not wanted. This can be a very underrated gift. Just that simple.

I would suggest you give her a hand massage with a beautifully scented relaxing cream.

Palliative care can still include treatment - so I think this is end-of-life care. My 'presents' were just holding hands and the loan of a battery radio with earphones (on low volume) - as I knew she enjoyed classical music. She was on oxygen and morphine, though, so seemed unaware that I was visiting. Therefore, don't expect too much - a conversation or recognition.

Could you take a manicure set and give her a mini manicure. It’s soothing and comforting to be touched in a non medical way. it’s surprising how grubby hands get in bed too.

A friend of mine took great delight in her well groomed hands towards the end.

The ward that my friend was in - the oncology ward was relaxed about most things. No flowers, had to do a Covid test every time I went in but otherwise quite happy to let us all get on with things as long as they didn’t upset anyone else.
All the patients were terminal and I think the attitude seemed to be that nothing could do their charges any more harm and anything that made them feel better was good.
Touch is very important even if it’s only holding a hand.

Hetty58

Please check with the hospital first. There's a long list of things not allowed on all (or some) wards/rooms - especially when people are seriously ill - including flowers, chocolates and anything scented.

I have to have my own room, laundry etc. as I'm highly allergic to so many things. On the few occasions I've been in hospital briefly, I've had to take high dose antihistamines anyway - as even a nurse wearing perfume would result in breathing difficulties.

No flowers allowed as they can harbour bacteria if the water is not changed and the nurses just don't have time to do that.

If the care is to be in a hospice will she have her own room?

I’ve recently taken some body cream with calming essential oils in it.
My friends legs were quite swollen so I gently massaged her feet and lower les with it..

Please check with the hospital first. There's a long list of things not allowed on all (or some) wards/rooms - especially when people are seriously ill - including flowers, chocolates and anything scented.

I have to have my own room, laundry etc. as I'm highly allergic to so many things. On the few occasions I've been in hospital briefly, I've had to take high dose antihistamines anyway - as even a nurse wearing perfume would result in breathing difficulties.

Good idea Primrose.

I remember seeing an old lady I loved in hospital before she went into a nursing home and she had a crochet blanket on her bed which comforted her - one she'd made herself.
She inspired me to start crocheting.

I crocheted my Mum a big throw for her bed in her favourite colours of pink, lavender, lilac etc. That wasn’t long before they said she was on end of life care. I cannot tell you how much comfort that blanket was to her. It was a talking point for her and the staff who all loved it and she was always touching it for comfort. I made sure she was wrapped in it when the funeral directors removed her and she was also buried in it.

A blanket like that takes a long time to make and crocheting may not be your thing but you can buy lovely ones at craft fairs or even on ebay (new).

I think a beautiful blanket or throw means you are cuddled in love for your final months or weeks.

Failing that a really lovely nightdress always appealed to my Mum.

My DMIL really appreciated lavender wipes and lip salve when she was receiving palliative care. Unfortunately they only need things to keep them comfortable at this stage.

Thank you so much for your replies and suggestions so far. She is too poorly to enjoy any of her interests which is why I'm finding it difficult. Reassuring that you think I'm on the right track and will take a look at Somerset lavender and our local health shop.

Does your Aunt like biscuits or maybe a bottle of fruit juice.

Sounds like you're very much already on the right track. Keep going and good luck.

I would suggest some lovely hand cream and body lotion, possibly her skin may become very dry.

Lavender is soothing and calming if she likes the scent of it.
Somerset Lavender make some lovely products.