Do you have to be "The Best"

Blimey. I spend my life just striving to be as good as everyone else!

I never need to get one up on anyone or boast about my achievement. I don't think that's anything to do with being a "boss"... certainly not a good one.

I am competitive but I don't mind losing in game situations

In life I've had to learn that not all tasks can be completed perfectly. I do struggle with this at times, especially if it is the materiels that stop me from doing a good job. I've had to learn that not everything can be perfect and sometimes it just needs to be done quickly but I don't feel good about it.

I am also very weird about rules, guidelines and training etc... I have to follow it to the letter... If I dont the anxiety is too much for me

I am definitely not a leader, I feel more comfortable with good direction

Oh dear, that's probably 50% of my personality lol

MerylStreep

I’m a Virgo. I can’t help being a perfectionist.

I know a Virgo who’s just the same 😬 not me btw it drives me crazy at times.
I like to do a good job but not at all competitive.

Surely if you are confident and feel respected as a person it would never cross your mind to get one up on someone.

I am not a perfectionist because I am dyspraxic and have ADHD, so perfection is physically and mentally beyond my capacity.

The mistake the OP is making is assuming that beng ambitious and want to make career progress means putting down other people. I do not think that in the whole of my career i ever put someone down or tried to do them out of anything.

If a job more senior or more interesting than the one I was in was advertised and I thought I could do it, then I applied for it. I like the intellectual challenge a new job offered and the expanded experience I got with every job.

As far as I know every job I had I did well, and received enough formal recommendations to be confident about that, but I thrive on work that is challenging and keeps me mentally on tiptoe.

This is entirely different to being competitive - and being competitive, is not the opposite to being satisfied with a job and notwanting to explore further.

tbh I've never thought in terms of being"the best" in anything I've done, just be "the best" I can and to have a balanced life. I did have a period in my life when I was very ambitious, had very rapid promotion and really wasn't very happy. I just decided there was more to life, took a job well within my capabilities and cruised. With the energy I had left I took up other interests and enriched my life. I could have "achieved" more in my work career but at what cost? I've been a good manager of people, people liked, respected and trusted me, I think because they knew I cared about them, they knew I would fight their corner if I thought they were right and equally that I'd be straight forward with them if I thought otherwise. I'm not a perfectionist that's the road to hell, but I have always had enough confidence in myself to ask for help if I have felt out of my depth and as I got older understood that the people I managed often had better ideas than I did!

grannysomerset The most useful lesson I have learned, far too late in life, is that for most things good enough will do.

I know this - but still don't believe it!

Life would be simpler if I could.

I’m a Virgo. I can’t help being a perfectionist.

I spent the best part of my life trying to be 'the best' daughter I could to my mother. I was very hard on myself, always trying to win her approval, until I finally realised that no matter what I did, it would never be good enough for her. So yes, I can be quite competitive in my own way and I still feel that I need to prove my worth. I also had a job where I had to get things absolutely right or run the risk of being sued, so there was that pressure too.

No, never have.

The most useful lesson I have learned, far too late in life, is that for most things good enough will do. Of course there are jobs where absolute precision is essential, and very stressful it can be, but I now feel that 80% perfect will do fine. Wish I had learned that earlier - I would have been easier to live with.

I'm a perfectionist as well. Unfortunately I know it stopped me reaching my potential.
I never wanted promotion at work even when it was offered to me. I knew I could not give my best because of family commitments and a DH whose job really was the focus of the house. I never wanted to be a member of the senior staff, but had to do my job to the best of my ability.
I don't think women Young women feel the same way today thank goodness.
Young staff came to me for help when they should have been asking senior staff. I appeared calm and in control at all times. and ended up with my GP diagnosing early retirement.

I’m a perfectionist too. That doesn’t mean getting one over on other people or boasting, but I lived with the knowledge that I would likely be sued if I made a mistake. Fear is a great driver, but it’s not a pleasant way to live your life. Unfortunately in my line nothing short of getting it absolutely right would do.
Like Joseann, I always appeared calm, but inside I was anything but. As she says, that is necessary if you’re the boss - panicking doesn’t help or inspire others or set a good example.

Once I've got the bit between my teeth I want to succeed. I'm not worried about being the best, but as a perfectionist I am driven to improve on my last performance.
I think I became a boss because I was able to jump in and face things without fear. I wasn't the best, but I guess I looked serene and capable! 😃

Not really competitive and don't really like the spotlight on me so happy to plod along doing the best I can. Will happily sit beneath someone else taking the glory actually. But I do put a lot of effort in, just in a quiet way.

This doesn't mean they are the best btw.

I'm boringly persistent until something is "just right".
This however means I'm slow.

I think the "boss" you describe is happy with "good enough" and so plows on forward.

I am not competitive at all and do not think I have anything or do anything to boast about.

I am also one of those people who if at first, I don't succeed, I give up.

Another here happy to do her best but not worried about being the best.
I always think my epitaph will be’She was good enough’.

I’m like you 62Granny, not ambitious ,not competitive at all, as long as something gets done to my best ability I’m happy, as for boasting, not really interested because I can’t imagine anyone else will be interested in my life.
I am a happy plodder .