Taking gifts when staying with friends

We have agreed with various friends to end the exchange of gifts when staying. But we always take our hosts out to dinner one night and they do the same when staying with us.

Nanna8, never heard anything so mean, to host a family for 2 weeks and not contribute is disgraceful. I would never have them again. If they had been to a hotel it would have cost thousands, did they ever consider all the extra work for you apart from money? If they ask again say I found it too much last time but suggest they get an air b and b and stick to it. If they get uppity do you really want such tight, mean spirited, selfish guests? I never visit without taking something and my friends the same.
Pippa you sound the perfect guest. I don’t enjoy having people to stay for more than a couple of nights though.

crazyH

Pippa000 - you have an open invitation to visit me 😂

You said it , Pippa000
😊😊😊😊😊

I’ve encountered that too nanna8 guests who seem to think their hosts (ie us) pay for everything except on the “return” visit where we would take our hosts out for dinner or lunch or both, because you do, don’t you?

Many thanks for all your suggestions. I have taken Welsh Cheese, as I live in Wales which we all enjoyed. My friend is, unfortunately a marvels baker, and her scones, and cakes are to die for. We have known each other for over 40 years and my late husband and I used to host her and hubby in Cyprus several times a year, so they are more like family I suppose. But I will certainly take all your suggestions on board. Thank you for the many interesting ideas.

Just as an aside, my husband’s brother, wife and 2 sons stayed with us for 2 weeks. We paid for everything including meals out which we did not mind. When they left they didn’t give us so much as a bar of chocolate which I thought was pretty mean. Especially because when we stayed with them for a couple of nights we paid our way and also gave them a lovely potted plant and chocs as a thank you. Some folks are just mean as muck as my Mum would have said.

The thought of anybody staying as long as 8 days fills me with horror. I always accept the wisdom that guests like fish go off after 3 (or maybe 4) days.
I would appreciate being taken out for a couple of meals, as hosting for any length of time involves more a lot cooking than when you’re on your own and of course shopping - and that can be expensive as you rarely give guests an easy scrambled egg on toast meal like you might make for yourself. Breakfast too- becomes a proper sit down meal instead of a cup of coffee on the hoof.
However, considerate guests especially if they are staying more than a couple of days, will allow their hostess some breathing space by taking themselves off now and then, being self sufficient and “ self-entertaining “
My heart sinks at the sight of a box of chocolates as all my good intentions go out of the window.
A while back I had the young AC children of a German friend which I was slightly dreading as life was a bit fraught but they endeared themselves to me by saying “Tonight we cook for you” and did the whole caboodle from the shopping to the washing up. Now that was really appreciated.

The Moulton Brown handsoap is a lovely commercial present. Also a homemade cake in a pretty tin is a personal touch.

You can get afternoon tea boxes delivered or cream teas perhaps to accompany a nice cold bottle of Prosecco

Find an experience near your friend. Sour dour baking or a paint and Prosecco evening.

Pippa000 - you have an open invitation to visit me 😂

I wish there was a LIKE button on Gransnet as I would press the button on most of the above.
Molton Brown hand wash is quite pricey to treat yourself with but it’s a nice present to receive. Happened to me only once. Good luck with choosing the right thing but I’d be happy with any of your previous choices being repeated. You are a very thoughtful guest.

My DS sent me an M&S breakfast in bed box for Mother’s Day which was lovely. It came with bagels, cream cheese, smoked salmon, tea bag’s& filter coffee. My DD dog finished off the smoked salmon as DH doesn’t eat it. Perhaps getting that sent to arrive after you leave could be a nice treat. Oh there was some lovely granola and Greek yogurt as well.

I would make up a box of food, (with food prices going up) different nibbles (nearly put nipples), nice tea & coffee, nice wine. Ask the local florist if they could wrap in cellophane with a nice bow.

Was sent a Betty's afternoon tea box for my birthday last month. Recommended. Top quality chocolate cake etc. - all very much enjoyed by my friends when we got together. Now very tempted to order another such for self alone so can have more than one slice next time...

Allira A nice Welsh whisky then ?

How about a bottle of good liqueur for your friends (and you) to enjoy after dinner? Some people like to pour it over ice-cream for dessert. Or you could take a home-made cake in a nice tin. An apple cake or a chocolate cake might be a nice treat with a mug of tea, after you've all been walking along the Dorset coast.

YorkLady

A Bettys afternoon tea gift box can be delivered whilst you are there. High quality and very enjoyable 😊

Lovely idea

JamesandJon33

Do you live in an area with a special food or wine? . For example I, living in Wales, could take Welsh cakes, laver bread, cockles etc. I think nearly every part of the U K produces something special. It should not be difficult

You can pop in any time JamesandJon but please don't bring me laverbread! 😁 Nor cockles
Welsh cakes, bara broth, Welsh cheese, Welsh wine, even some leeks but not that seaweed stuff.

Wow, you are generous! It would never occur to me to take more than one of the three things you mention, but I would either pay for a meal out, or buy the entire ingredients and make it for my hosts one day while I was there.

If they are happy with what you bring, I don't think you need consider changing anything.

In all honesty.. you could NEVER bring me enough/too much cheese!!
You sound like a lovely houseguest! I am sure they enjoy your visits just because you are you.

Could you make her a cake?

Do you live in an area with a special food or wine? . For example I, living in Wales, could take Welsh cakes, laver bread, cockles etc. I think nearly every part of the U K produces something special. It should not be difficult

All garden centres have so many lovely gifts, go and have a browse.Biscuits in pretty tins, jams and chutneys, soaps and so on.How about a pretty solar light?

What about a tree, bush or rose for their garden to mark your visit/friendship. David Austin and others have named roses for various events/anniversaries.