Sons/Daughters birthdays

Ours have all had their 30th and 40th birthdays.
We took them, and their own family, on a holiday of their choosing.

Whether we'll be able to afford this by the time they're 50 remains to be seen 🤷

I imagine a great deal will depend on how many AC someone has. An only ‘child’ isn’t going to work out as costly as someone having several AC and also personal circumstance and expectations from those AC.

Both mine didn’t want grand expensive gestures so both had an ‘extra special gift’ (cash matching their ages) and help with catering for their celebrations. We would prefer memories made from family events than events for just one person.

What a lovely daughter you have! I'm afraid I would have given her a whopping cheque just for saying that! I tend to 'reward' kind, thoughtful, or good behaviour more than birthdays etc.

My son has just had his 60th. He's planning a road trip to Italy to celebrate so I've given him a PO money card loaded with 100Euròs
Normally I wouldn't spend that much but I thought it's a special occasion for both of us!

I give everyone money 7 Adults and 6 GC ( the parents know what the little ones want and buy it for them.) - £200 each. I know it seems a lot. The fact is , I am divorced, my friends are all unable to travel, so I can’t spend my money on holidays, my needs aren’t much, and above all, I can’t take the money with me.
I’m trying to make sure that when I go, they won’t have to pay much, if possible , NIL inheritance tax.

Sorry, 7 Adults (2 of the GC are young adults ) and 4 little GC

Probably better fir them to have now, whilst your still here crazyH.

We use birthdays and Christmas to pass any spare money on to our children. I know not everyone is but for those of us who are, I think it's better to give money away when it's needed. We keep comprehensive records of our yearly expenditure and pass on the cash we don't spend, so it is not subject to IHT even if we drop dead the next day.

I’ve only got 2 daughters, so I’ve given substantial gifts every big birthday from their 21st. DD1 will be 50 in a couple of years time and has ‘her order in’ for a Mulberry Bayswater (it’s a handbag) in a bright colour!

I might add, I have twice helped my son to get a new family car but not as a birthday or Christmas present.
My daughter is extremely financially secure and though I do buy her a lot of presents for Christmas etc she has specified she does not want me to give her money for birthdays or Christmas.
However I do have a bond maturity coming up (not a fortune by any means) in the not too distant future so I plan to give them both a decent sum, as I pointed out to her they would be getting it anyway eventually, I would get pleasure out of gifting it while I'm still around. So she said if that's what I really wanted and had planned that would be lovely. I was just curious as to what other people gifted as special birthday presents.

DD had her 50th eighteen months ago, DS has his coming up this summer.

We gave DD a goodish sum which she used to buy a piece of furniture she wanted.

We shall give DS the same amount.

I plan on giving both them and the GC (five in total) more money than we used to. They can probably make more use if it now than later.

Just have to keep enough to pay for nursing home fees, operations, extra help at home etc if ever we need to. I hope we don’t.

[sigh]

We just spent a bit more than usual and tried to get a few more gifts or small experience type gifts.

My younger son was 50 last Sunday. He dislikes any birthday so did not want to celebrate or receive any gifts. We insisted on seeing him as his birthday was important to us and we gave him two bottles of good wine.

crazyH

I give everyone money 7 Adults and 6 GC ( the parents know what the little ones want and buy it for them.) - £200 each. I know it seems a lot. The fact is , I am divorced, my friends are all unable to travel, so I can’t spend my money on holidays, my needs aren’t much, and above all, I can’t take the money with me.
I’m trying to make sure that when I go, they won’t have to pay much, if possible , NIL inheritance tax.

I had a Nan like that. She would give us money Willy Nilly for the same reason you do.

After an inheritance I’m giving both my children £1,000 each for their birthdays. We do secret Santa for Christmas with a modest amount spent. Im not sure what to do for my only grand child. A trust, junior ISA or just pay for what they need.

I suppose all this is subjective as we all have differing amounts of disposable income so 🤷‍♀️

I did indulge my DD on her 40th a little, planning a surprise escape room event for the family which she loved.

With my son he doesn't care much about birthdays and all he wanted was a water tank for his allotment.

Fair enough.

We are in the fortunate position that we can either give a monetary gift, in an attempt to reduce IHT. Or buy something they’ve been saving for, or pay for a holiday. They certainly appreciate it.

Think my income might be different to yours. Couldn’t afford holidays or large sums of money but give what I can afford.

We have five AC, only two have reached 40, we gave our son £400 and I took my Step-daughter on a two night spa break.

The others are way off 40, so tend to get £100 each birthday and £50 Christmas plus small gifts.

FriedGreenTomatoes2

I suppose all this is subjective as we all have differing amounts of disposable income so 🤷‍♀️

Absolutely FGT.

We took dd, her husband and their two teens away for a cottage holiday in the Lakes for her 50th which turned out quite expensive but we felt lucky we could do this as she is a hard working teacher who has been the sole provider for her family for more than 20 years. She never complains even though work/homelife can be stressful so it was a pleasure to be able to do this. We also gave her a special necklace which she loves and chose herself as something more personal.

We loved the time together and I wish we could do it more often.

Usual money. Always two zeros and at Christmas, three…if we can afford it. Although we do save throughout the year to do so.