Why can't I wear this to a wedding?

Show your DGD if you can , try it on for her and ask her if she approves, your DD is being a bit precious tbh , as you say no one attending will have seen it, and who on earth remembers what the bride's grandmother wore to a wedding. You like it , You feel good and comfortable in it . That should be all that matters.

Wear what you like and tell your lovely DD just to worry about what she and her DD are wearing!

You have to be comfy and feel good in whatever you wear and it sounds lovely

How things have changed over the years. When I got married we picked our own dress and usually the bridesmaids (I chose not to have bridesmaids) and that was it. Guests just wore whatever they liked as long as it was dressy.

I remember my Mum wearing a navy suit with white piping and a smallish navy hat. I didn’t for a minute think to tell her or my MIL what to wear. Incidentally she wore a dress in various shades of blue.

stillawipp

I can't believe that some are seriously telling you to do what you want & ignore your daughter's wishes on her big day, OP. Maybe just head over to the Estrangement threads & see how that generally works out for people....please don't be one of them for the sake of a dress...

But it's not the daughter's big day, presumably she had hers years ago.

What is the Mother of the Bride wearing?
Will it be chilly, so could you get away with wearing the coffee lace outfit with a jacket, Sarnia?

Lathyrus3

I’m really quite sad about the picture if Granny in the corner that nobody notices.

It would be top table, front of the church, entrance after guests are seated and right there in the photos, especially the three generations of women one. Girl power👏

No-one puts Granny in the corner!

Wasn't it so much more simple when photos were all in black and white.

Totally agree it’s the bride and grooms day.

I just love those generation photographs. The grooms as well as the brides.

Three, four sometimes even five generations of women. And the same line up of men. The men look gorgeous in their matching suits.

More difficult for women to get the co-ordinated look.

Lathyrus3

I’m really quite sad about the picture if Granny in the corner that nobody notices.

It would be top table, front of the church, entrance after guests are seated and right there in the photos, especially the three generations of women one. Girl power👏

I don't equate it with not being noticed.
To me its the natural order of things.
I'm sure granny will be noticed, and admired, but it isn't her day, for want of a better phrase.

And its certainly not the mother's day, either.
They had theirs, and are invited along to take part in the bride's special day

I just wonder how much the GD will actually care about what her Gran wears, unless she's one of those brides-to-be who are hyper-fixated on matching this-that-and-the-other because, to her, it's an important part of the ceremony?

Won't she simply be happy with wedding photo's that show a smiling, happy Gran looking confident (because she's comfortable) in a suitable outfit that fits her?

Maybe her focus will be more on the flowers, other decorations, the cake - and her future husband, rather than on what Gran has decided to wear?

I don't know, I could be wrong, I'm just offering an additional view.

Plenty of those shades and lace on here

share.google/dyKIxBZF4jd9Sl1DL

I remember Prince Alice (well I don't, but on TV) at the Royal Wedding (Elizabeth & Phillip) wearing her Nun's habit.
She was mother of the groom & that was possibly the first wedding on the planet to be televised.

What does the bride to be think?
I wore my Mother of the Groom dress to another family wedding recently, and my lovely DDil said that it made her happy to recall such a wonderful day.

It sounds lovely Sarnia and, as discussed on another thread, all these shades of coffee, taupe, brown etc are very on trend right now as is lace.

There is nothing worse than feeling uncomfortable or unhappy with your choice of outfit for a special occasion. You say it fits beautifully and you feel good in it so just wear it!

Would your daughter like it if you told her what she could and could not wear? We mature ladies still have our marbles and are perfectly capable of making decisions. If you were saying you would be wearing a fluorescent green mini dress with thigh high boots then I could understand it! 🤣🤣🤣

Don't think either of my grans (I was lucky they were both there) bought anything new for my wedding. They wore their "best clothes".
Mind you, if they'd bought anything new it would have been "new but the same" as they always wore the same styles & colours to go out.

I’m really quite sad about the picture if Granny in the corner that nobody notices.

It would be top table, front of the church, entrance after guests are seated and right there in the photos, especially the three generations of women one. Girl power👏

Maybe the daughter is the messenger?

WHY are so many people bothered about the daughter?

As M0nica and I both say, this is the granddaughter's wedding.

Please ask HER.

stillawipp

I can't believe that some are seriously telling you to do what you want & ignore your daughter's wishes on her big day, OP. Maybe just head over to the Estrangement threads & see how that generally works out for people....please don't be one of them for the sake of a dress...

It is her granddaughter's big day, not her daughter's so she will not be the centre of attention. Just the granny in the corner who everyone has a quick word with and moves on.

I doubt what the OP daughter wants her to wearwants to wear will be any different from anything new she buys. I also think half of all family estrangements are caused by people who believe in the tyranny of children and that parents should always acquiesce to their children's every demand.

Personally I think when parents and children are all adult they should all be capable of talking things through and reaching decisions that are mutualy acceptable. For example, in this case, hiring an outfit for the day and returning it afterwards.

I can't believe that some are seriously telling you to do what you want & ignore your daughter's wishes on her big day, OP. Maybe just head over to the Estrangement threads & see how that generally works out for people....please don't be one of them for the sake of a dress...

Firstly, I couldn't manage two hours, let alone 'a day shopping' so that would be out if it was me.
Secondly, I can never find anything I like or which suits me now.

Wear what you want to wear and ignore your daughter. To my son's wedding, as mother of the groom, wore a silk suit that I had worn twice before, once for my graduation ceremony and once to a wedding, I looked for something else, but could not find anything I liked.

I jazzed it up with some braid and got a new slip top, shoes and bag. I also did not wear a hat but had some flowers in my hair.

I cleared this with DDil and her mother, but only as a courtesy.

Buying a garment for one wear only is an environmental crime.

I have just had an idea, why not hire a dress for the day. There are companies around who hire out bridal wear, and that includes mother/grandmother of the btide outfits. Why not hire an outfit and then hire it back.

Members f the Royal family wear their outfits again and again for different events.princess Anne keeps resurrecting outfita she wore decades ago. If it is good enough for them, it should be good enough for your daughter!!!

Maybe ask if there is a colour theme they’d like you to fit into? If not, no reason you can’t wear what you’ve got. New bag and shoes? Maybe new modern necklace/earings/fascinator?
Show daughter your outfit- if she thinks it’s not right suggest you spend a day shopping for a new outfit. Why not if you can afford it?

Me too.
I was bought up to be told that - not a woe is me thing, just a sensible fact, to my mind.

I'd be thinking that they'd all be looking at her, not me.

Well, it's the bride's big day, in my opinion, so if I had been told nicely by her that my outfit was a bit dated, I'd probably take notice.
I'd rather know what exactly the objection is.

I've worn lace yo family weddings twice - a sort of pale teal/ light denim colour and a lilac one.

Lots of Ann Balon outfits out there specifically marketed at Mother of the bride/groom...

I would speak to your granddaughter.
It's her wedding.
...AND she will tell you straight if she doesn't like it!

If it's the colour, can you have it dyed?