Precocious or just confident?

I can't help observing that outgoing, articulate boys are more commonly seen than outgoing, articulate girls. I think this is partly to do with the fact that the girls are more likely to be squashed if they behave like this. For some reason it is still seen as more acceptable for boys to be overtly self confident.

I would have,said precocious, until I read everyone else's replies.
I'm still of the "children should be seen but not heard" school of thought.

kircubbin2000

He is very much into drama and music so I think that has made him like this.

I agree. He is a confident young man.

Too often people gathering at funerals don't know others and disperse after paying their respects so what a very thoughtful move by your GS who I'm sure will have made and left a lasting positive memory for them and a GS to be proud of.

I have also witnessed the precocious children in school, they are not well liked!
I agree with that statement in some ways. Precocious children aren't taught to be so, its just how they are, and often they show greater emotional depth and sensitivity. Maybe this is what happened at the funeral.
In my experience, precocious young children don't always enjoy playing with their peers, but prefer to seek out adult company, say in the playground or at break times. I've known a few prefer to stay indoors chatting to library staff about some quite intellectual stuff, or helping teachers mount wall displays etc.

One of my GCs, age nine, is like that. They have two siblings who are nothing like that so I don't think it is their upbringing. Neither parent is like that either.

I don't think it is a sign of precociousness and I would far rather see my GCs being self confident than being wracked with self doubt and low self esteem.

SpinDriftCoastal

He sounds delightful. It is not precocious, it is called having social graces. Precocious is boasting and having a big ego. I once taught a boy of 11 who wore a signet ring and wore aftershave. He went far in life.

I agree - it doesn't sound precocious to me.

What a brilliant job his parents have done giving him developing his self confidence, politeness, interest in others. Presumably it is considered "precocious" because he is 11 years old? I think its brilliant and setting him up for life

He sounds delightful. It is not precocious, it is called having social graces. Precocious is boasting and having a big ego. I once taught a boy of 11 who wore a signet ring and wore aftershave. He went far in life.

I have to disagree with most comments here. This sounds like a child who is very attention seeking. I have come across this before. A child of 6 at a family wedding who, encouraged by the mother, stood on a chair to deliver an unscheduled speech. An 8 year old (not a relative) at a an elderly person’s birthday party who decided to conduct the guests in a rendition of Happy Birthday. I have also witnessed the precocious children in school, they are not well liked!

Greenfinch

It is certainly unusual behaviour for a child of that age but I wouldn’t label it precocious. Everyone is different and it is lovely that a child felt confident enough to do this. It should be encouraged.

I agree.
It sounds similar to a boy I know with Aspergers.

My Son would do this from about 10 years old, with confidence, he was happy to chat to ladies on the supermarket tills. Even younger about 8 he saw a Wasp in a Car he then knocked on the drivers window, saying "Excuse me, you have a Wasp in your car" the lady flew out of the car thanking him.

He sounds a very confident young man and you should be proud of him.
Being at a funeral often means being amongst people who you don’t know well, how lovely that this child struck up conversation with everyone some of whom might have felt a bit isolated.

He sounds like a lovely confident, polite young lad.

That’s really lovely and shows he is very confident.
I have a 11 year old GS too, but I can’t see him doing that - he is a shy boy , not painfully shy, but shy.

He sounds lovely - and yes, it could be the drama classes which have helped him feel confident in himself. Mind you, my GS would probably do something similar - he's 'not backwards at coming forwards' as we say around here!

What lovely manners! Very grown-up for his age, in a positive way.

I imagine is not the way many 11 year olds would behave but all children, like adults, are different, my old mum would have said ‘he has an old head on young shoulders’, which is a compliment.

It is unusual behaviour I think he’s a very confident young man, I would have hid in the corner hoping no one noticed me at that age Perhaps his drama group has given him more confidence than most
None of my children or grandchildren would have approached adults in this way, they would answer or chat if approached but they wouldn’t initiate it

I would have been proud to have a son like that. Sounds like he’s a credit to you 😊

I think it sounds ok, especially if it were to older family members who didn’t have a clue who he was.

“Hello, my name’s John, I’m Mary’s son, she was the niece of Auntie Flo whose funeral this is” or words to that effect.

If that were me, I would be thinking “Oh, so this is Mary’s son”…

Polite boy. I would have felt proud of him.

kircubbin2000

He is very much into drama and music so I think that has made him like this.

When my 16 year old GS, obsessed with music and drama, went in for his interview at the Brits, before he sat down he went along the line of people on the interview panel and shook hands with each one.
He is autistic, not suggesting your GS is, but rarely have I found autistic youngsters to be ill mannered.

It is certainly unusual behaviour for a child of that age but I wouldn’t label it precocious. Everyone is different and it is lovely that a child felt confident enough to do this. It should be encouraged.

I think I would be impressed as long as he did it in a kind considerate way,
your other son sounds a touch jealous/ envious.