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Words that have helped

(13 Posts)
Imperfect27 Mon 11-Jan-16 17:23:55

Just an invitation to post any meaningful words: poems, songs, letters etc. that may have helped you to grieve.

Imperfect27 Mon 11-Jan-16 17:29:22

Khalil Gibran's writings have been important to my family for many years. ~The following can be found in his book 'The Prophet' where he also writes beautifully on marriage and parenthood. We used this reading at Evie's funeral and I spoke of her, naturally, as our 'delight' in my eulogy. My son Joel has the first line tattooed over his heart in honour of her. It may be very hard - too hard - to think of any 'joy' in the early stages of grieving, but I think there is great truth in these words and I hope they can be helpful to some,

Janice x

On Joy and Sorrow
Kahlil Gibran

Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.
Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?
And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?
When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Some of you say, "Joy is greater thar sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater."
But I say unto you, they are inseparable.
Together they come, and when one sits, alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.

Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy.
Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced.
When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall

Evelyn Judith Arnold 23.11.1993 - 25.08.2006 Love you forever...

Regalo Mon 11-Jan-16 17:31:10

I have found this very helpful:

Death is nothing at all,
I have only slipped away into the next room,
I am I, and you are you,
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still,
Call me by my old familiar name,
Speak to me in the same easy way which you always did,
Put no difference into your tone;
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without effect, without the shadow of a ghost on it.
Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was; there is absolutely unbroken continuity,
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am just waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner.
All is well.

Henry Scott Holland

Imperfect27 Mon 11-Jan-16 17:36:35

Beautiful Regalo, thank you. I have not heard that for many years, but because time has slipped by, it is all the more meaningful.

Harr1s Fri 15-Apr-16 18:54:36

I had this for my husband. It's by Joyce Grenfell.
If I should go before the rest of you,
Break not a flower, nor inscribe a stone.
Nor, when I'm gone, speak in a Sunday voice,
But be the usual selves that I have known.
Weep if you must, parting is hell,
But life goes on, so sing as well.

Imperfect27 Fri 15-Apr-16 19:39:50

Harri1s flowers and [[[hugs}}}.
I like that very much - over time I have learned to 'sing as well' and I am sure my daughter would be glad. xxx

Daisyanswerdo Sat 16-Apr-16 16:33:14

Harr1s, that's lovely. I'm sure my daughter, who I lost just over a year ago, would have loved it too. I will make sure it's put with my letter of wishes. Thank you. Lovely Joyce Grenfell. I met her once, at a book signing.

nigglynellie Sat 16-Apr-16 17:36:46

I found this on the back of a photograph of my late father. It was written by my mother after he had been killed in Dec 1942, five weeks before I was born:-

Life is eternal, and love is immortal,
and death is only a horizon,
and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight.

A bit like your poem Regalo, and strangely comforting.

Imperfect27 Sat 16-Apr-16 19:46:23

How beautiful nigglynellie.

Imperfect27 Sat 16-Apr-16 19:49:04

Daisyanswerdo, I am sorry for your loss - my daughter died nine years ago - nearer ten now. It is a long journey back to equilibrium. PM if ever you want to. xx

baubles Sat 16-Apr-16 19:50:20

I posted this on another thread earlier this week. There is some doubt as to the origin apparantly but I found it comforting.

'Say not in grief 'he is no more' but live in thankfulness that he was'

baubles Sat 16-Apr-16 19:52:38

I also like this.

Love is Immortal - Author unknown

Love is pure energy and
No matter how hard you try,
You can never kill love
Because pure energy can't die
The feeling of love can fade,
And the body can cease to give,
But the energy created by love
Is immortal and continues
To live.

nigglynellie Sat 16-Apr-16 20:03:41

I just want to say how sorry I am for everyone's loss on this thread, and how lovely the verbal contributions