House Clearance

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I have recently cleared my mother's house and it is not an easy task and I feel for you having to do it at a distance.

Firstly, I would remove everything you want to keep. I found this turned out to be a lot less than I expected and was basically paperwork and photos.

As for the large items, do check they were not supplied by the NHS. If they were you can arrange for them to be collected. I gave up on selling anything in the end although a couple of items went to members of the family. I bagged all the small stuff and then left the house clearance people to remove it with the larger ones. Then my daughter and I went in to clean through although there are companies that will do that too.

I'm afraid charities are, quite rightly, very picky about what they will take and when they will pick it up. Balancing that against the time I had available I'm afraid any items just went to clearance. If you are the only one available to clear you must do it to fit with the time - now less than four weeks - and energy you have available.

My brother died suddenly ten years ago and left me two thirds of his things. He owned a terraced house in a Northerner town which I eventually sold. It took two years! It took ages to close his bank accounts etc but that can be done at home. I gave some of his reasonable furniture to relatives. Clothes etc to charity shops then got a clearance firm, it was about £180 I think they probably made a big profit. I’m sorry for your loss and that you’ll have to rush to clear everything. I’m trying to streamline my house so that my children don’t have so much to do!

You can do this in 4wks. I was given 10 days by local council and both my siblings disappeared the day after our mother died and left it all to me. I had to fit it in around pt work but got there. Clothes went to charity shop, furniture was collected by local charity, some items went on fb, some items I sorted for siblings and I to keep, rest went to tip. My pil house was cleared by house clearance company but dh had more time to sort things as private house. It is daunting but definately doable x

Thanks everyone both for the advice and condolences. Lots of useful suggestions xx

Sorry for your loss. British Heart Foundation took all good quality clothing and we requested if it could be sent to another branch to be sold. They sent us a lovely letter telling us how much money it had made for charity. Older items were bagged up and taken to tip by car. Council had scheme whereby they took items like chest of drawers and gave to people leaving care. They took beds, wardrobes, chest of drawers, TV. One of my sisters wanted the 3 piece suite. We also found our Mum had still got a lot of our Dad's clothing and personal effects in wardrobes and he had died 20 years before. We found some old love letters my Dad had wrote to my Mum from war before they were married. We found my Mum;s wedding dress. It upset us but as none of us wanted to keep them we eventually decided to burn letters and throw dress away. If we had known about letters before Mum was buried we would have put them in coffin with her.

Personally I would get movers to put it into storage then deal with it in our own time. But that does cost money

So sorry for your loss... my mum was 92 when she died and lived in sheltered housing. We had just one week to clear her flat . My brothers who lived very near her were useless ,...my sister went on holiday “ because it’s booked”...and I was left having to do it all...I lived 100 miles away...still worked , as I’m youngest ( they didn’t)I had no car....an invalid husband to care for. I had to leave him for two days , in the spasmodic care of good freinds and neighbours looking in..., I moved into her flat while I hired a skip and anything that didn’t go to local charity shops , had to be dumped into it , I did all the heavy lifting myself , I kept a few bits for myself, I never saw anything of my brothers in that time. I also arranged funeral. After funeral my siblings were full of criticism for the way I’d handle her belongings.I couldn’t speak for the shear audacity of them all. I still ( 10 years later) cannot bring myself to forgive any off them for their negligence of my mother and of me at this awful time.So in your four weeks ,you have plenty of time to organise your dads bits and pieces ...take it slowly ...charity will take a lot of stuff of your hands, and be grateful for it! Card in local newsagent is old-fashioned, but effective way to sell smaller items... e-bay also good. As for yourself just keep a few keepsakes and photos..... and if you have any offer of help, please accept it., and please....don’t forget to take time out to start grieving for your beloved dad, that’s more important than stuff.

When this happened to me I couldn’t get anyone to give me anything for a mobility scooter in fantastic condition and used 3 times. Whatever you do keep using it and charging it up. If the batteries die they cost a couple of hundred pounds to replace. In the end I had to give it to a house clearance chap and he wanted to charge for collection but I did say no. Good Luck. It’s very emotional clearing away things to a tip or charity shop that someone once treasured.

We have cleared 4 houses in the past 7 years. The first being my late brothers home. When my aunt moved from a 3 bed rented house to a 1 bed bungalow, we had less than a week to empty 30 years worth of 'stuff' and move her into the smaller property. It was a nightmare as she didn't want to part with anything!
As others have said, local charities offering free collection were a godsend. Go through clothing etc and donate or recycle wherever possible. I also sold some items on Shpok and Facebook too.
Do make sure you check the pockets when going through the clothes. My aunt had taken to hiding stuff, some of it was quite important.
Good luck.

GrandmaKT, I had to deal with a similar situation about 2 years ago when my dear Mum died. She was also in rented accommodation and I had a similar time to clear the house. My eldest brother lives in NY and the youngest has a very young family so I resigned myself to dealing with it on my own. I went through all the clothes first sending any good ones to the local charity shop and all the others to the dump to be recycled. I then went through all her ‘treasures’ and jewellery and allocated pieces between myself and my brothers for keepsakes. Everything else I donated to our local Florence Nightingale Hospice, who have a charity shop and they sent a large van and took everything away, including white goods, furniture and contents of kitchen. I was then given regular updates of the amount of money they had made for the charity from the contents of my Mums home, which gave me enormous pleasure. I’m sure there would be a local charity near you who would offer to do the same. I do wish you well and hope you manage to clear the house in time.

Never heard of the name pop or mom in the UK before.

First my condolences for the loss of your dad.

There are many good suggestions on this thread. I would like to add as a back up and in the interest of time, that you relocate (all or some) of the items to a rented, temporary storage unit, especially if you can't readily decide what to do with.

Sorry for your loss. A difficult time. Do make sure you go through everything before discarding . My MiL lived hand to mouth yet when she died we found stashes of money hidden all over the house adding up to a substantial amount. There was even money in the fridge. She must have been saving for years as some of it was pre decimal. Our first reaction was to get house clearance in as like you we only had 4weeks. So glad we didn’t.

I would not rely on BHF taking furniture as they are very fussy and do refuse quite a lot of things. Their attitude is not helpful but I assume it varies in other areas.

GrandmaKT I am so sorry for your very recent loss. I hope that you are looking after yourself and taking one day at a time.
When my friend's elderly mother died a couple of years ago, my friend was stunned to find that items of personal value and a very large amount of cash had been concealed in odd places in the flat. For example - under the faux coals of the elecctric fire...stuffed into new toilet roll carboard centres, taped to the back of drawers, under the foil in the grill pan...all sorts of weird and wonderful hiding places her dear old mum had found to 'save' both cash and things of personal value. So if you do use a house clearance service, double check not just the obvious, but a few other places as well, just in case pop has put things in places for safe keeping. I hope that you will find some help for the task ahead= a neighbour here died last year and we helped her sister who lived elsewhere, to do the clear out. She was comforted and on a practical note, kept 'on task' as we only had two weeks to clear the flat. Things were designated to bags labelled 'family' 'charity shop' or tip. The three of us shared out the cleaning materials, loo rolls and etc. The local charities did well with furniture and clothes. Our neighbours sister was glad of the help and we were glad to be able to do something practical. Maybe one of your pop's neighbours can help you, too. People like to feel useful at times like this. Thinking of you and wishing you well.x

Condolences GrandmaKT and all others - I too went through this twice in 6 months, first my father although I had my brother and sister to help and it was his house - then a close friend whose sons weren't much help and he lived in a Gwalia (housing association) flat. I did get an extension on the time although rent had to be paid and they knew my own circumstances (not long had one hip replacement and was waiting for the other). In the end, because it was surprising how much was in a 1 bedroom flat!, I couldn't do any more and arranged for them to clear the rest free of charge for donating the big furniture and possibly leaving the rest for the next tenant when I sent the keys back. Apart from a slight problem when they said the keys weren't in the envelope (which they were and I had sent it recorded delivery so told them to ask whoever signed for it after giving the name) I never heard anything from them.

I did this last year for my father also aged 90 plus - so sorry for your loss its a shock at any age.
I also had to get everything cleared in a limited time. In the end I used an Auction house it worked out cheaper and I got some money back into the estate.
House clearance wanted cash to do it upfront and facebook /ebay takes to long. Good luck with it all. he Auction people were very good. The other thing they said was 'do not throw anything away' - sound advice as we never know what could be lurking after 90 years.

Sorry for the long post. Once I had started talking about my mom, I couldn't stop. Apologies.

I was in the same situation in that my mom lived in assisted housing and required 4 weeks notice. She was in hospital for 2 months before she passed away during which time we stayed in her place with the agreement of the housing manager. She was quite ill and it was decided she would need 24 hour help so we agreed she would come to live with us by the sea, unfortunately as I said, she passed away whilst in hospital. Each member of the family were asked if there was anything they wanted before we disposed of the rest. As my mom was going to be living with us, we had taken quite a lot of the things she wanted to keep to ours so she would have some of her own things around her. After relatives had taken what they wanted, we called a charity and they came and took everything else so the place was left empty. Most of what we had taken to ours was taken to the charity shop except for a few thing that I wanted to keep. Charities are usually very helpful in arranging or advising on getting help with clearances.

Sincere condolences on the death of your dear "Pop" GrandmaKT

When my grandma died a couple of years ago (aged 99) I was left with the task of emptying her LA rented bungalow. Had 1 week to do this or I personally would have to pay full rent . They are all heart these people aren't they? It was a bit of a mammoth task and in the end I had to give in and pay rent for one week .

I started by asking every family member if they wanted anything which got rid of her 2 TV's, radio, DVD player etc. I then hired a skip which we put at the front door. I then made a large poster and attached it to the skip saying "anyone interested in the following items to ring this number" I attached a list of items (wardrobes, drawers etc. and my mobile number) within minutes I had requests for almost all of the big stuff. Over the next few days me and my cousins husband emptied the rest of the stuff into the skip and most of it was coming out at the same rate as it was going in. All of her personal items (clothes, books etc) went to charity shops and my mum took all of her personal items which following my mums death, my dad still has (much to my annoyance) and won't give up.

It was like a small military operation and all in all it took just over 2 weeks and very little was thrown away.

It is a very sad task emptying a loved ones home. I still pass her little bungalow every day and get this kind of wrench in my tummy and a lump in my throat.

Hello GrandmaKT
My ex elderly boss died couple of years ago up in the North East which was quite a journey from where I live. He left his belongings to me. I went up to the rented elderly persons complex where he lived and asked other elderly residents to come to his apartment and take whatever they wanted. Before long I had got rid of a lot of items. I bagged up his clothes and took them to a charity shop. I then contacted a disabled persons charity and was told about a warehouse where they would take virtually anything. They were delighted. Items that I couldn’t find use or good home for were discarded at the tip. It wasn’t easy and it took me a few days but determination to get it sorted motivated me. I’m currently in the process here in my own home of sorting out things I took several boxes of DVDs to the charity shop a few days ago which they will sell in their shops or possibly on eBay. My thinking behind this is as I’m getting a little older it’s far easier now to become minimalist while I’m able too rather than leave it till I’m unable too. I wish you good luck and sure you will sort it

So sorry for your loss an all that it entails. We offered my DD electric chair to a local care home for anyone who couldn’t afford to buy one for themselves - it was snapped up and I get a certain amount of comfort knowing it is being appreciated by someone who wouldn’t otherwise have had that assistance. You might be able to do the same with the mobility scooter, or some mobility / aid shops will take and sell on for you.

Sorry to hear you've lost your dad and that you and your siblings are a distance away.
Please give siblings a date or two when they can collect momentoes. I was a long way away compared to siblings, and offered on several occasions to help clear the house, but...
I didn't want anything of value, but was hurt, and quite resented being excluded when I realised what was happening.
Good luck x

A wors of warning to go through and remove anything you might want before a clearance company come in.

An elderly lady I knew moved in with family and basically abandoned her stuff. When she eventually got a clearance company in she told them to sort out photos, jewellery and a few other things she wanted to keep as they cleared. Of course that didnt happen and stuff she wanted disappeared...