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Bereavement

Birthday today

(16 Posts)
Grandmadinosaur Wed 06-Oct-21 09:22:30

Today is my mums Birthday the first one since she died in February. I live a distance away from my dad but I sent a blank card with flowers on the front. I thought he would still want something to put on the mantelpiece in memory. I know he will also put flowers there too.
He has a hospital check up today. When they made it the nurse said do you want me to write the date down or will you remember it.
Not so much in her later years but previously to that I used to dread her birthday as she was so difficult to buy for and you could always tell if the gift was approved of.

GrannyGravy13 Wed 06-Oct-21 09:38:09

Grandmadinosaur we celebrate our Mums birthday every year, my sister, our C and GC.

This started on the first birthday after she died (7 months) it brings us comfort, we laugh at memories and of course there are tears.

Thinking of you 💐

Grandmadinosaur Wed 06-Oct-21 10:48:29

Thank you Granny Gravy

I take comfort in thinking she is somewhere out there now reunited with her large band of Aunts,cousins etc and my dear grandparents.
I have learnt that you deal with situations that feel right for you.

FannyCornforth Wed 06-Oct-21 11:01:52

It’s my Nan’s birthday today too.
The first one without her.
Thinking of you Grandmadinosaur
It’s sad isn’t itthanks

FannyCornforth Wed 06-Oct-21 11:06:10

How old would your Mum be today Grandmadinosaur?

My Nan would have been 97 today.
Like you, I like to think of my family being reunited.
My Nan with her darling husband, and my wonderful, amazing Mom, who died aged only 50 ♥️

FannyCornforth Wed 06-Oct-21 11:06:49

Is your Dad doing okay?

Grandmadinosaur Wed 06-Oct-21 11:24:43

Thank you Fanny thinking of you too today 💐.
My mum would have been 83.
My dad is doing brilliantly- he nursed mum so well at home. He has a large garden that he has spent a lot of time on and other interests. Has just been on a short break away with my brother. He has a good neighbour they’ve lived next to for 50 years and they look out for each other.
I only worry about the winter coming up dark days etc and also him keeping his health which is pretty good and he still can drive though only going short distances.

Incidentally he lives where you are!
Are you doing anything to mark the day today Fanny?

JaneJudge Wed 06-Oct-21 11:27:42

I'm sorry Grandmadinosaur [flower] I think sending your Dad flowers is a lovely idea.

I'm sorry about Nan too Fanny flowers

muse Wed 06-Oct-21 11:44:39

What a loving caring thought to do for your father Grandmadinosaur .💐 Sounds like he has the perfect neighbour.

I always think of my mum and dad on their birthdays and particular this year when mum would have been 100.

Germanshepherdsmum Wed 06-Oct-21 12:41:56

So sorry Grandmadinosaur and Fanny. I’m pleased your Dad is doing so well Grandma.
Anniversaries are always difficult, but we remember our loved ones every day don’t we? 21 years since I lost my parents, and my dear Granny died in 1966, but not a day passes when I don’t think of them, likewise pets I’ve lost. Only temporarily lost though, it sounds as though like me you believe we will meet again. In the meantime I feel they’re not far away.
Love to you both. x

Puzzled Fri 26-Nov-21 16:05:01

Tuesday would have ben nor son's 53rd Birthday.
We have treasured his memory for 30 years.
Yesterday, we attended the funeral of S i L. She had had a stroke and was in excruciating pain from scoliosis.
We are sad to have lost her and will keep memories of happy times together, but it is merciful that she is no longer in such pain.
We think of the privilege to have known and been with her.

Grammaretto Fri 26-Nov-21 16:16:15

That is so nice grandmadinosaur.
After mum died in 2008 we still remember her on her birthday and buy her favourite drink and nibbles and plant a rose or buy a bunch. Her bd was in June. Dad also in June and he gets a geranium!

Tomorrow will be the first anniversary of DH's death. I am dreading it a bit.
I have invited his mum and brother over for high tea and perhaps DS will come with his family. A moveable feast with some bubbly.

It could become a tradition.
FannyC flowers

Granny23 Fri 26-Nov-21 16:25:02

It would have been my Beloved Husband's 82nd Birthday today too. Second Birthday without him and it has been a very poignant day as we have finally finished emptying his Shed/Workshop prior to moving house next week. Doesn't get any easier does it?

Grandmadinosaur Sun 28-Nov-21 21:07:26

I’ve only just read this Grammaretto but I hope you got some comfort on the anniversary of your DH’s death.
💐

Grammaretto Sun 28-Nov-21 21:49:42

Oh Granny23 flowers and thankyou Grandmadinosaur
I survived and it felt nice to drink a toast to our beloved son, husband, father, brother, grandpa, friend.

JackyB Sun 28-Nov-21 21:52:05

My sister and I skype and simultaneously raise a glass with our mother's favourite tipple (gin and tonic) on the anniversary of her death. We intended to do the same on her birthday last week, but sis was very busy preparing her church Christmas market and wouldn't have been home all evening. We had a quick phone call instead.

Our mother would have been 102 this year.