All you need is a good man

Respect to your son in law Greatnan that's a horrible stretch of water.

Galen - he is a captain on the Interislander, the huge ferry that connects North and South Islands. He gave up deep sea trips when he met my daughter!

How breathtakingly sensible ps I couldn't agree more. As an adult, I have never been dependent on another person to provide for me, male or female. I have never believed in stereotyping and am happy to pitch in, whatever needs doing. I am more than happy to accept that there are things which a male can do better than me - equally there are things I can do better than my partner. I really don't understand either the feminist or alpha male perspective, what you describe as unadulterated drivel, either. We're all people with often complimentary strengths. Get over it and get on with it and stop whingeing .

Greatnan as a ships captain does he ever come to Avonmouth or Portbury?

I like your post , PS

However, don"t think many will , ho hum

I am both surprised and a little dissapointed in the reactions posted here. Whilst I agree no one, whether female or male, should be dominant or submissive in any relationship I would have thought that one based on mutual respect, love, trust and caring would negate any thoughts of anyone taking advantage or seeing their partner burdened with either domestic chores or financial obligations. I don't think it is a case of "looking after a man" or woman for that matter. Surely it is a case of doing what each of us can for our partners because we want to. If we don't want to then perhaps there is something lacking in the relationship.
I can only speak for myself but if I thought any partner of mine was being burdened by any domestic chores or financial matters I would consider myself at fault and guilty of either not helping enough or providing accordingly. As it is I can wash, Iron, use a dishwasher, vacuum etc. I am slowly learning to shop efficiently and would willingly share all domestic chores. I would like to think however that chivalry is not dead and as much as pseudo feminists or alpha male stereotypes keep feeding the rest of us mere mortals unadulterated drivel we must resist their preachings and live our lives in a way that is acceptible to both parties without any advantage or otherwise being taken and have enough respect for our partners to ensure they can live and enjoy their lives without feeling they are burdened. How very sad for those that do not, in my humble opinion.

I have Read the article. What she should be addressing seriously is her desire at all costs for publicity. On the same page in the DM is an article about weekly shopping around the world. Much much more interesting.

You may be right, anxiousgran, and I was certainly glad that I had a good career when I wanted to divorce my husband.
My son-in-law is indeed an exceptional man. My daughter had a well paid job in England, but since they emigrated to New Zealand she does not go out to work, but she does keep pigs and chickens and grows almost all their fruit and veg. His salary as a ship's captain is enough to support them in some comfort and he loves having her at home - he works week on, week off, so they are able to enjoy the outdoor lifestyle together when he is home - the whole family loves walking, cycling, kayaking and camping.
Two of their six children are still at home, at 15 and 14, and of course they love coming home to find her there, usually cooking. She feels that it is just as important for them now as it was when they were younger.
She spends a lot of her time schooling and riding her horse and also volunteers at Riding for the Disabled, as do the two children.
She has been offered a job in New Zealand similar to the one she had in England, in Drug and Alcohol Services, and possibly when the last child has left home she may consider returning to work, although she will then be in her mid fifties.

Her three girls have been brought up to believe that a woman should be able to support herself because no matter how good a relationship you think you have, tragedy in the form of death , illness or unemployment can strike any family.

Never get yourself willing into financial dependence on a man.
Through bad health reasons I stopped earning my own money after 35 years of working, (with breaks to have children). I am now in what I feel is a very precarious position living off my husband's income, and I hate it.
I think it would take a special type of man not to take some sort of advantage of this situation.
My DIL is expecting her and my DS's 1st baby soon and she is intending to return to full time work after 12 months. I haven't influenced her decision at all, but I am quite relieved, even though the man involved is my loving and reliable son, brought up to respect women. Luckily I am in a position to help with child care.

Sheer bliss eh, Noodles .

Nonu Yes, and yes again. (())

ANA , ^ I know ^ x

Nonu

I am also of the opinion that these retirement years with DH are the bestest ever .

Sansgran; I agree with you; I was alone for years, but not with a career, but with three children to bring up.All that, and working made me into a thoroughly independant minded person.Then I met the man who is now my husband.28 years on, and I have seen both sides of the argument.I can now say that looking back, I am glad that I was able to experience all of it.But now, in retirement, I believe that these years with my husband are the very best of all.

Married mine on the understanding that his mother never lived with us!

DH and I got married on (his) stipulation that I didn't become a domestic slave. He had had a girlfriend who he described as being lively and interesting until they became engaged when she went into full domestic slave mode and it frightened him stiff. The engagement didn't last long.

As I had already determined I would never ever be anything of the kind it was good to know I was marrying somebody who wasn't going to expect it of me.

A pathetic woman? Or one with a book to sell?

To be honest, who wants to be with the kind of pathetic man who wants his wife to be a domestic slave?

It is pretty obvious that she meant the blog to cause discussion. If you can't stand the heat, don't blog about your kitchen!

Like your style when

D'you think the posts were deleted just because she's a GN Guest Blogger? Perhaps she reported them!

Just wondering.......what about asking for the blog itself to be deleted for offending US? No? Worth askin'......

Bags I thought your deleted comments were quite kind, rather than insulting. A bit like being told what a daft ha'porth you are. Wouldn't boher me a jot!

Bags - You are a little minx sometimes, but I like you!