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LucyGransnet (GNHQ) Thu 19-Feb-15 15:34:17

Dog poo wars

Villem Saks contemplates the humble dog poo. Is it as much of a problem as it seems? Or are village dog poo <fanatics> prowlers fixing their beady eyes on the wrong problem? Villem considers...

Villem Saks

Dog poo wars

Posted on: Thu 19-Feb-15 15:34:17

(135 comments )

Lead photo

Villem's late canine companion, Rocky.

Poor old dogs, they get a bum deal. Horses produce manure and cats do their business, yet dogs 'foul' or produce 'mess'. Granted, getting the stuff on your shoes and walking it across a clean carpet isn’t fun, but that’s about as bad as it gets.

So why does it divide communities and why do some of us recoil in horror at the stuff? Let's start by choosing the right word for it. I'm sticking with turd. Sure it's a little coarse but it has impeccable heritage in that it comes from the Old Norse tordyfill meaning dung beetle. I reckon humans are repelled by dog turds because deep down, psychologically, they remind us of our own. There's no research to quote but maybe it's an evolutionary thing which maintains our perceived superiority over lesser mammals. The notion that our waste products look and often smell the same as dogs is an affront and might be upsetting for many people.
There is the big issue of kids going blind from Toxocariasis which is caused by roundworms in dog turds. If children eat them then there could be a risk of infection. However, according to the NHS there have only been 30 cases in England and Wales between 2000 and 2010. Cases that involve blindness are rare.

In many villages and towns there are ongoing crusades to wipe out dog turds from public places with the use of ruthless highly-trained Council Response Against Poo operatives who will stalk and fine anyone seen committing a turd offence.


Recent anti dog turd signage also blames domestic dogs as a major cause of the apocalyptic sounding Neosporosis which causes cattle to abort. However, according to many vets the science is not conclusive. Some maintain that it is mainly farm dogs which carry the cysts that infect cattle. And yet these diseases are touted as major health risks. In many villages and towns there are ongoing crusades to wipe out dog turds from public places with the use of ruthless highly-trained Council Response Against Poo operatives who will stalk and fine anyone seen committing a turd offence. They will liaise with curtain-twitching residents who, on orders from many local parish and town councils, will be expected to report their neighbours giving a description of the poor mutt and details of the errant deposition.

There is some rationale for implementing a program of information and enforcement in urban areas but is it a problem in the village environment? There's no doubt there are those who let their dogs deposit anywhere including the weird people who pick up nicely in a plastic bag and then toss it into a hedge where it hangs forlornly; presumably waiting for the Dog Turd Collection team from the local authority.

It’s really a matter of common sense. Pick up where it is plainly apparent that someone could step in it. Bagging a turd on a wind-swept hill or farmer's field seems like overkill. An agile flick of the boot which sends the offending lump into a hedge or stream is not going to cause an outbreak of bubonic plague.

The maximum fixed penalty for failing to pick up a dog turd is £1,000. In the UK each year about 2,400 children are killed or seriously injured on the road. Many of these accidents are caused by excessive speed. The maximum fine for speeding is also £1,000. There are speed gun patrols in some villages but when it comes to installing bumps or flashing signs, the Parish council bleats on about the cost and how it will impinge upon character of the village. Dog turds, it seems, are more of a problem.

Villem Saks is the author of How to survive the English Village: a guide for retirees, returning expats and folk not from these parts, available from Amazon.

By Villem Saks

Twitter: @Gransnet

Eloethan Fri 20-Feb-15 19:11:26

How can you possibly stop a cat pooing in other people's gardens? It's not very nice, admittedly, but really aren't things getting a bit out of proportion.

The animals that create the most havoc and pollution are human beings - given that we've destroyed the lives and habitats of many animals can't we be a little more lenient?

rosequartz Fri 20-Feb-15 19:23:53

Cats usually defecate in nice soft soil then bury it, so that if you have prepared soil for planting then go to plant you may find it. It's unpleasant but if you wear gardening gloves not too hazardous.

Dogs just poo on the grass where children may play.

By the way, I am a dog lover, not a cat lover, but I am realistic.

rosequartz Fri 20-Feb-15 19:24:54

given that we've destroyed the lives and habitats of many animals can't we be a little more lenient?

But it's not the dogs we are blaming, Eloethan, it's their irresponsible owners, presumably human!

NfkDumpling Fri 20-Feb-15 20:10:34

The cats don't bury it in our garden. (Well, one does and I generally find it when it's stuck to my gardening glove.) The others leave it all over the place. Garden beds, lawn, veggie patch. They sneak in at night and booby trap the place. I keep having to borrow the DC's dogs to discourage them. At least they stick to the lawn and we're looking out for it. There's no way of telling when a cat will strike!

Eloethan Fri 20-Feb-15 23:01:56

How can you blame the owner for a cat pooing in someone else's garden? It would mean that they would never be able to let their cat out of the house.

mrsmopp Fri 20-Feb-15 23:14:12

Cats bury their own poo. Show me a dog who can do that!

rosequartz Sat 21-Feb-15 10:58:19

Our last dog used to do a sort of ineffectual scratching of the lawn in a vain attempt to cover it up, mrsmopp
grin

grannyactivist Mon 23-Feb-15 14:24:24

Perhaps cat owners could train their cats to use a litter tray so that the cat owners have the bother of dealing with their mess perhaps? I am fed up of having to clear piles of cat mess off my lawn every week - and I've tried every method of deterrent, but still it appears. When I had a cat I trained it to use a litter tray, so I don't see why others don't. angry

merlotgran Mon 23-Feb-15 15:01:35

Maybe my memory is playing up but didn't we have a thread about surviving village life a year or so ago? I'm sure it was linked to somebody's book or blog. hmm

Same author?

I don't remember dog poo being mentioned though.

Anya Mon 23-Feb-15 16:43:24

MrsMopp it's really NOT an advantage if a cat buries its poo. I would rather see it where I can deal with it than meet up below the surace when I'm planting bulbs etc shock

Anya Mon 23-Feb-15 16:43:48

..meet it...

Ana Mon 23-Feb-15 16:46:35

grannyactivist, I've had several cats over the years and all were trained to use a litter tray - in the house.

I don't think a cat could be trained to only use a litter tray, especially when it's out and about sometimes far from home!

hildajenniJ Mon 23-Feb-15 17:23:16

I take a bag everywhere I go, when I have the dog with me. I clean up after her wherever we are. I used to have a cat when I was a child. My Dad hated planting in the garden, as he was never sure where the cat had been! My dog's poo is usually quite solid and picks up easily, the cat poo remained quite liquid, eugh!

Hymnbook Wed 25-Feb-15 19:15:58

My neighbour has a dog He leaves it alone all night whilst at work Every morning when he arrives home from work it is let out off the lead & it goes straight onto my grass no fence He used to pick the pooh up but no longer does this I am sick of having to clear up after his dog. I dread the warmer weather. I like to sit in my garden & I have grandddaughters who come to play there. Can any one suggest a deterrent I can buy to put on the grass ?

loopylou Wed 25-Feb-15 19:28:48

Do hope no one else is reading this whilst eating their supper (me)....... One way of reducing how much you eat I guess!
It's an offence not to clear up after your dog in public places, shouldn't it apply to other people's lawns too Hymnbook?

rosequartz Wed 25-Feb-15 19:49:04

Have pmd you with a suggestion, Hymnbook

axlefoley Wed 25-Feb-15 23:37:29

Yes I agree more notices put up on walks etc I think would help with the problem and would not cost to much.

Iam64 Thu 26-Feb-15 08:44:58

Hymnbook - the only deterrent I can think of is a large fence. I'm taking it as a given that you have asked your neighbour not to allow his dog to do this?
There is also the alternative option - become a very unpleasant snooper and photograph this man and his dog, over the course of several days. Present the "evidence" to your local dog warden and community police person. This course of action won't endear you to your neighbour and you'd need to consider the possible longer term consequences. Good luck

Mishap Thu 26-Feb-15 09:05:18

I have posted this suggestion before, but maybe Hymnbook has not seen it.

Pick up the offending poo and place is in a large paper bag. Place said bag upon neighbour's doorstep - light the paper bag at the same time as ringing their doorbell. Neighbour will emerge from front door, see the burning bag and proceed to try and stamp out the flames - you then have to hope he gets the hint!

Anya Thu 26-Feb-15 12:55:01

Hymnbook a land mine should do the trick.

Braganza Thu 26-Feb-15 14:44:47

I live in London, and dog fouling is a huge problem. Apart from the obvious disgusting mess - the residue from bagged poo, may not be easy to spot, particularly at night.
I am saddened by the fact that when I take my grandchildren out, instead of encouraging their curiosity and delight in nature and architecture, and running around the park without a care,our eyes have to be on the pavement (or grass) all the time. The thing is, once a dog poo has already been stepped on once, it is harder to identify it before it's too late! Our enjoyment is so often ruined by the selfish behaviour of dog-owners.

sussexpoet Thu 26-Feb-15 15:12:09

I lived in London for many years, and grew more and disgusted by the state of pavements, grass verges, parks, etc. Personally, I think there are far too many dogs in the UK generally and in London particularly. I would urge any future government to reinstate dog licences, at a realistic figure for today, say £20 renewable annually (with obvious allowances for guide dogs, OAPs' dogs, etc). All dogs to be fitted with a microchip at birth, which would record whether the licence fee for the year had been paid or not. All non-licenced and stray dogs to be culled. The British have had for many years a reputation throughout Europe for liking their dogs more than their children - and I'm afraid it's justified.

annemac101 Thu 26-Feb-15 17:31:47

I've moved temporary to a smallish village. Plenty of dog walks around and most people have multiple dogs. I have never seen a stray or any dog on it's on and yet the pavements are covered in dog pooh. It's the worst I have ever seen. My friend came to visit and parked her car on the road outside my house when she was going home she had to step over dog mess to open her car door. I myself have a German Shepherd and he poohs in the garden before we go out but I always take bags to clean up after him. Something has to be done it's disgusting.

Elegran Thu 26-Feb-15 18:08:31

There was a time twenty or more years ago when our street was persistently fouled by a couple of dogs, neither of which was ever seen without a lead on. One day I was looking out of the front window when one man allowed his dog to poo a lead's length up my drive, in the very centre, while he stood and watched it. When he saw me looking he hauled on the lead so that the poor thing had to stagger across the pavement, pooing as it went - more mess.

I started taking out a watering-can of strong disinfectant every day and pouring it over the pavement, in the hope that the smell might put the dogs off, and the wet patch give a broad hint to the owners. One woman led her doggie out into the road to that his delicate paws would not be comtaminated by it, so perhaps it had some effect (She saw me watering and remarked "You should get a good crop" to which I answered "I should do, it has had plenty of fertilizer" )

It stopped when the man owning the first dog died - they like to poo where others have marked the spot, and when the worst offender had gone, the others did not persist.

ojeezus Thu 26-Feb-15 18:32:04

I live in a small village and the dog poo issue often causes apoplectic rumbles amongst the residents. The pros and cons have been well considered here but there is one bizarre activity that we have experienced: someone has been out and spray painted said turds in bright blue. I'm not sure whether this has been done by a dog-owner - to assist walkers and stop them treading in it or by an anti-poo campaigner to make a point. Has anyone else come across this phenomenon?