And her book's called, "Lifelines. Words to help you through"!

Oh, you reckon you can sort out all the problems these people haven't really got?!

Oh, I love journos.

The paranoia is driven by the media and technology that enables the communication of information 24 hours a day. 30 years ago mobile phones for all didn't exist, computers were not in every home. The world is a small place these days and back in the day, what we didn't know about didn't hurt us.

"Young women take offence and get angry if a man pays a compliment and the fuss goes on for weeks."

I think she was probably referring to the lawyer in the Linkedin furore, Charlotte Proudman who made such a fuss.

I'm sure Bel Mooney didn't have any objection to being 'letched over'!

'after'

wilmaknickersfit I agree with you my kids look everything up on Google and jump to the worst case scenarios. by the way I was pretty upset when my kids went to uni

I was taught that pride goes before a fall but these days everyone has to be proud.....of yourself, your kids, your cat, your latest car, the meal you've just managed to cook. Facebook could be renamed Boastbook but if anything goes pearshaped it's an earth shattering experience which has to be shared with one and all so the sympathy can flood in.

It always makes me chuckle when somebody wails that their washing machine has flooded the whole kitchen and they get at least 35 'likes'.

I am frequently moved to tears at the sight of cruelty to animals or children suffering life limiting conditions on the TV but I'm usually shouting, 'Get a grip' at all the crocodile tears being shed by spineless wimps.

I shut down my Facebook account because I got sick of the keeping up with the Jones attitudes, although I prefer the Boastbook nickname. I do have a Facebook account now but it is completely private and just used on the odd occasion I need an account to take part in something.

Why? I don't get it about people being 'upset' or 'howling for days' when their kids go to uni. What is there to be upset about? Mind you, that has brought back a memory... My parents, I learned later, were worried that I'd be homesick during my first term at uni. If I'd known about ROFL back then that's what I'd have done. Homesick? Nope. Not for a second. I was a young adult ready to spread my wings.

So I remembered that when my kids went off on their early adult adventures (one still to go). Either you've brought them up to become independent of you and have been expecting it for years, or you haven't.

Surely?

Well, it was a hell of a wrench for me. It felt really life changing. It was life changing. I still get mini versions of the saying goodbye trauma when they come to visit and go home again.

Different strokes for different folks I suppose. Either that or I'm a bit nutty.

Children leaving home is one of life's losses and it is natural to mourn, I think, even when you have known from the moment they were born that the moment would come, and even if you would be worried if they showed no inclination to leave!

Of course if you are a grownup yourself you accept this loss in the knowledge that you will be compensated with the satisfaction of knowing that you have brought up your child to be competent to stand on his or her own feet!

merlot the one that gets me is the "feeling emotional" tag ... when the Facebook post that accompanies it is something like "cake flopped..."

I read a column somewhere - I think it was in the Metro - calling for "Let's have a Human Interaction Only Day" where all technological interaction is off limits for the whole day. It really made me stop and think ... it will come have to come to that, declaring an official day, because soon entire generations won't know what that was like.

I agree with Bel. There's much ado about nothing a lot of the time.

I was excited for my DSs when they cut the apron strings - though they'd been fairly loose anyway. I could remember when I did it and if it was good for me it would be even better for them. And there were plenty of things for me to get my teeth into with them out of the way.

I don't know any parents (but especially the Mums) who didn't have mixed emotions when each of their children went off to university, etc.,. A mixture of loss, end of something and pride. Sounds perfectly reasonable to me.

Playing devil's advocate -

Do some of you unknowingly resent your children raising your grandchildren differently to how you raised them?

How many of you will admit to disciplining your children by smacking them?

How many of you went out to work when your children were young, so child care was a problem if a child was ill and needed to stay off school?

Do you really resent how much your children praise and encourage their own children, instead of telling them when they need to do better?

Don't you think your children are trying to do their best for their own children?

Do you think you were better parents than your children are?

Do you think your grandchildren are generally well adjusted children who are kind and caring - or something else?

Just asking.

Wilma I rather resent posts which are a long list of intrusive questions to other posters, so I'm not going to answer any of them.

If you think or suspect some of us smacked our children, resent the way our DCs bring up our DGCs, went out to work when our children were little, why don't you just say so?

My apologies if you didn't like my post. I don't agree the questions are intrusive, but no one is obliged to reply. I was just trying to think of things that the next generation of parents would want to do differently and make posters think about the reasons they agree with Bel.

I don't care what the answers are, although I think it would make interesting reading, mainly because of the wide age range on here. What is considered normal changes all the time.

I think know my DD is a better mum than I was. She is so laid back around them for one thing. And she has always left them to do up their own buttons, put shoes on for themselves etc. I always took the shortcut of doing it for them. Not good. She is excellent in many ways, but I often used to feel just a few more rules might be good.

I have only worked outside the home for six years in my whole life, before kids.

Sometimes I smacked. Wish now I hadn't.

Oh - and I am the one who praises my GS,s to high heaven. Much more than their mum and dad do.

They are both kind and caring. (underneath the granny-bashing)

I don't quite understand where those questions have got us in relation to the Bel Mooney 'blog'.

It's not physical granny-bashing btw. I do not need Social Services.

I'll shut up now.

Wilma
If it's unknowingly, how would I know?
I wouldn't admit to it, because I didn't do it
I did
Not applicable, as they have the sense not to praise bad behaviour
Yes
No
Yes, for 2 year olds

And what is your learned conclusion?

It's relevant to Bel's blog because she's talking about the younger generations - younger than us that is - and thinks they fuss about the slightest things. Some posters have agreed with what she's written basically saying children will never learn to stand on their own two feet and be able to face the rough and tumble of life. She's talking about our children and grandchildren, so I was asking what is it that makes posters agree with her.

Maggiemaybe it's not a test. As I said I was playing devil's advocate to make people think about why the younger generations are different. Thinking about something might change the 'unknowingly' to something else. Sarcasm isn't very pleasant to read BTW. It feels like you are sneering at me.

Sneering ? No. Poking a little fun at the assumption that anyone who disagrees with you hasn't thought about it.

I suppose it's one of the drawbacks of having continual contact with all ones acquaintances via ones smart phone that, for example, when the sponge cake is dropped on the floor one has a good rant on FB instead of just blaspheming privately at the oven.

Perhaps if we'd have had such 'luxuries' we'd have been the same?

What was normal for us - the cold, the leering old men, the being turfed out to play in all weathers, the office fumblers - isn't normal now. I wouldn't really want to go back. I watch the mums walk past here taking their kids to school and they don't really seem so very different to (from?!) us.

I wonder how this 'blogs' thing on Gransnet works. I mean, when the so-called 'blog' is just a way of advertising a book. Does the 'blogger' have to pay a fee to GN? Or do they get a their advert free, just for writing a few words about any old subject.

Just thinking aloud really.